Correction
by BensonFan711
Summary: Could you change your nature? Even if it meant your life? Or the life of someone you love? For Alex and Olivia, these are questions that will have to be answered.
1. Chapter 1

**Correction**

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

**Chapter 1**

"_Good morning, New York. It's a beautiful day out there with a high of 45 dipping down to a low of 37 this evening. Right now, it's 42 degrees…"_ the radio said. A.D.A. Alexandra Cabot reached over and hit the clock a few times before silencing the voice.

"Mmmm…nooo, don't wanna…" came the groggy voice of Detective Olivia Benson. Alex remembered her coming in last night around 4:30am, after working all day and most of the night on a particularly grueling case.

"You sleep, Liv, but I have to go to work," Alex whispered to the sleeping form beside her. Olivia looked so cute in her black cami, laying on her side with an arm wrapped around the attorney's waist. Alex started to slide out of bed, causing the detective to wrap her powerful arm around her tighter.

"Stay…" she mumbled.

"You know I can't. Sleep, love, I'll be home early today." Alex gently lifted her arm, causing another string of mumbles from Olivia. She slid out of the bed and pushed her pillow into Olivia's arms. The detective took it and hugged it to her body, sighing contentedly.

"Smells like you…" she said as she drifted back to sleep. Alex took a minute to admire the peaceful sleeping form of her lover before heading for the bathroom and stepping into the shower. She lingered for a while, enjoying the feel of the warm water on her body. She stepped out, blow-dried her hair, and slipping into a beige suit. She finished her make up. When she stepped back into the bedroom, Olivia was still curled on her side, snoring softly, nuzzled in Alex's pillow, with her brown hair covering her face. Alex wished she could crawl back into bed with her, but instead, she picked up her briefcase, and headed out the door.

XxXxX

Olivia opened her eyes and blinked until the clock came into focus. 1:05. She needed to wake up now, or she would never get back to sleep tonight. She sat up and yawned as she stretched.

_Coffee,_ she thought, _I need coffee._

She slipped out of bed and padded her way down to the kitchen. Alex had set up the coffee pot for her before she left, so there was already a filter, coffee, and water there. All Olivia had to do was flip the switch.

Olivia smiled as she waited for the coffee to brew, reflecting on how their relationship had come to be. It had all started with Babs Duffy, believe it or not. Babs was type of ball-busting lesbian who believed everyone was persecuting her and her fellow lesbians. After she had hit on Olivia, Olivia had insisted she was straight, but she didn't mention that there had been a question mark surrounding that issue for her for quite some time. Her relationships with men had been far and few between, and she never seemed to have any chemistry with any of them.

And then there was Alex. She and Alex had been friends ever since the A.D.A. was initially assigned to the unit. Years later, Olivia realized that their close friendship was something deeper. Olivia never would have acted on these feelings until Alex had left SVU again. Now she was working with a specialized task force, but she was still based in New York with trips to Africa and the Netherlands when required. Olivia poured herself a cup of coffee and curled up in her favorite chair, thinking about their first date.

_Alex, I need to talk to you,_ she had begun. Through the course of the evening, she had spilled out her realization that she was attracted to women. She knew from previous experiences that Alex was gay, but she kept it out of her professional life. And not only had the blonde been incredibly supportive and nurturing, she had also revealed that she had had a secret crush on the detective for years. One thing had led to another, and now, Olivia could barely remember the last time she had actually slept in her own apartment.

She placed the empty mug in the dishwasher. Cragen had sent both her and Elliot home, with orders to take the day off, which she was glad to do after the case they had just wrapped up. They had just collared a rapist who was attacking lesbians in an effort to "correct" them. The very thought sent shudders through Olivia, merely because it was hitting close to home for her. But, that was over. He was going to jail, and the streets were safe once again.

"Hi, honey," Alex said, walking in the door. She set her briefcase on the counter and slipped her arms around the brunette's waist. "I told you I'd be home early today. What time did you wake up?"

"Mmm…around 1:00. That last case really drained me," Olivia answered.

"Well, I thought that maybe we could go for a walk, and grab a bite to eat. We've both been working crazy hours, and I'd really like to spend some time with you," Alex suggested.

"That sounds wonderful. Let me go grab a quick shower and change," Olivia said.

"Aww…but you look so cute in a cami and pajama pants," Alex said. Olivia swatted her lightly before flashing a smile and heading off to the bathroom. Alex took the opportunity to step out of her work clothes in favor of jeans and a simple cotton button down.

XxXxX

Alex and Olivia strolled through the park, hand in hand. They stopped and sat at a bench near a playground that was full of children. A familiar ache settled in Olivia's heart.

"Did you ever think of having children, Alex?" she asked. Alex turned and studied her.

"I hadn't given the matter much thought, but I'm not opposed to the idea," she answered. Olivia chuckled.

"Well, that's quite the lawyer answer," Olivia said.

"What do you mean by that?" Alex asked.

"It wasn't a yes or a no. I feel like you're trying to pull information out of me," Olivia answered.

"All right, yes, I have considered having children, but I never met anyone I wanted to have them with," Alex answered.

"Not even me?" Olivia asked.

"Olivia, out with it. Are you saying you want to have a baby? With me?" Alex asked.

"Well, maybe not right now, but eventually, yes, I think I would," Olivia said. Alex leaned over and kissed her on the cheek.

"Why don't we go, before you run over there and snatch someone's child," Alex said jokingly.

"Great, there's a story. 'Cop arrested for kidnapping,'" Olivia responded. The two women stood up and headed down the path. They stopped at a cozy Italian restaurant that they both loved, and shared a plate of pasta, followed by drinks. Over drinks, the conversation turned back towards work.

"This guy actually thought he could turn lesbians straight by raping them?" Alex asked.

"Yeah, crazy isn't it?" Olivia responded. "I mean, I can't think of a worse way to make a woman hate men."

"Well, it's more than that, and you know it," Alex said.

"No, of course I know that," she said, "If you like guys, you like guys. If you like girls, you like girls. Nothing can change that."

"Even if it takes you forever to admit it?" Alex said, raising an eyebrow.

"Even then," Olivia said, smiling. "But sometimes, when it takes a long time, you find a beautiful person who was waiting for you all along." Olivia put her hands over Alex's. The touch sent electric currents running through Alex.

"Olivia, let's go home," Alex said.

XxXxX

The two women fell onto the bed in a tangle of limbs and clothes. They kissed each other hungrily. Olivia rolled Alex onto her back and gazed at her with a predatory look. Alex melted under Olivia's stare. She loved when the detective staked her claim on her. It was so powerful and so sexy. Olivia slipped a hand under Alex's panties grinned. The blonde was dripping. Olivia leaned over and nipped at the blonde's neck, marking her as her own.

"I have wanted to taste you all day," Olivia said, as she continued to lick and suck at Alex's neck. Alex threw her head back in ecstasy. Olivia's hands were everywhere, teasing, exciting, driving her up, until she would bring her crashing down. Alex was nearly a puddle underneath her, clawing at the sheets around her. Olivia kissed her way down Alex's body, zeroing in on her hot, wet, core. She flattened her tongue and licked along Alex's slit, eliciting a shudder from the blonde. She used her fingers and her tongue to work Alex up to the point of total ecstasy, until she cried out Olivia's name, shuddering from pleasure. She collapsed back on the pillow. Olivia climbed back up and laid down next to Alex.

"You're amazing," Alex said.

"Mmm…so you've mentioned," Olivia replied. "Sleep well, Alex."

"But you didn't…" Alex started.

"It's ok…you can make it up to me in the morning," Olivia said. She watched Alex, stroking her blonde hair as Alex drifted off to sleep. Alex curled an arm around Olivia's waist and pulled her close. The women fell asleep, wrapped in each other's arms.

XxXxX

Alex woke suddenly. She heard sounds coming from the front of the apartment.

"Olivia, wake up," she whispered, nudging the brunette.

"Mmm…sleeping…" Olivia mumbled.

"Seriously, wake up! I think someone broke in," she said. Olivia's eyes shot open as her cop reflexes kicked into gear.

"Stay here," she said, grabbing her gun off the nightstand and heading out into the living room.

_**Remember, this is just the first chapter. I have great plans for this story, so stay tuned for an update, and please, tell me what you honestly think.**_


	2. Chapter 2

**Correction**

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

**Chapter 2**

Olivia placed her left hand on the doorknob, readying her gun in her right hand. She opened the door a crack before taking a quick glance outside. Alex was sitting straight up in bed, barely able to hear anything over the sounds of her own heartbeat.

_Olivia is a cop, _she told herself. _She knows how to take care of herself._

Olivia's glance had revealed a dark figure in the living room. She needed to make move.

"Don't move," she said, throwing the door open. The figure in front of her put his hands in the air, stopping suddenly.

Alex reached for her cell phone after hearing Olivia's voice. Someone was definitely in their apartment. She wasn't sure if the burglar knew she was there or not, and she didn't want to risk alerting him to her presence, so she flipped open the phone and pulled up Elliot's number.

_Help. Apartment broken into. Olivia needs back up. Alex. _She pushed the send button, hoping and praying that Elliot would get the message. She continued to clutch the phone like a lifeline, straining to hear clues from the living room as to whether or not Olivia was ok.

Olivia did a quick sweep of the apartment, keeping her weapon trained on the man in the living room. She saw nothing.

"Against the wall," she commanded. She wrenched his hands behind his back.

"Alex! I need my cuffs!" she called into the bedroom. Alex climbed out of bed and grabbed Olivia's cuffs from the dresser where she always kept them. She hurried out into the living room and handed them to Olivia. The intruder laughed cynically.

"I knew you were just another dyke, trying to be a man," he sneered.

"You have the right to keep your mouth shut," she said, snapping the first of the cuffs on his wrist.

"Alex, I need you to call for…" Olivia turned towards Alex. Another figure had stepped out from the closet behind the blonde and was moving towards her. "Alex, move!" Olivia yelled. The figure wrapped his arms around her, pinning her arms to her sides. He brought a gun to Alex's head. The blondes blue eyes widened behind her black rimmed glasses.

"Olivia, please…" she said, panicked.

"Ok, let's just calm down, here. I need you to let her go," Olivia said.

"Not until you let my partner go," he growled back.

"Easy…I can't do that, but if you let her go, the D.A. will take it easy on you," Olivia said. He pushed the gun harder into Alex's temple, breaking the skin. Alex squeezed her eyes shut, and a whimper slipped past her lips. Olivia still had one hand on the wrists of the first intruder, while her gun was trained on the second. She had been in situations like this before, and they always scared the hell out of her, not knowing who would fire first, if anyone would fire. Would she walk out alive? Would Alex?

Olivia wanted to get a shot off. She had every legal reason to fire, but as long as he was holding Alex as a shield, she couldn't. It was a stand off. One of them would break first, and Olivia was determined that it not be her.

"What's the matter, scared, Dyke? Afraid of losing your precious little blonde number over here? Although, I must say, she is an attractive little piece of ass," he said, sneering at Alex. Now Olivia wanted to kill him. She longed to squeeze the trigger and watch the life drain from his body, but she still couldn't get a clear shot. They stood again, in silence.

"Let him go," the man holding Alex demanded.

"I already told you, I can't do that," Olivia said.

"Then you're going to watch your girlfriend die," he said. "I'm giving you 5 seconds to change your mind before you watch this execution. 5…"

Olivia's palms were sweating. Her hand was shaking, and she was sure he could see that. Alex's eyes were on her, begging, pleading with her for help.

"4…"

Alex's heart was pounding. She knew Olivia too well. Her strong detective would never give in to the demands of someone who had forcefully broken in. She had 4 seconds to prepare herself for death.

"3…"

Olivia needed a plan, and she needed one fast. She tried to push the thought of her girlfriend's brains splattered all over the living room carpet out of her mind. It hadn't happened yet, and she would do absolutely anything to prevent it from happening.

"2…"

He was pushing Alex down to her knees, still using her as a shield. _Stand up_, Olivia thought. If he stood while she was kneeling, she could get a good shot in. _Oh, please, stand up. Let me kill you._

"1..."

At that moment, four separate events took place. Alex's phone vibrated from the other room, breaking the silence. The gunman with Alex twisted his head in response to the noise. In doing so, he gave Olivia the perfect opportunity for a shot, which she gladly took. He was dead before he hit the ground. Alex let out a blood-curdling scream at the sound of the shot, followed by sounds of shock and surprise as she realized she was still alive. The intruder that Olivia had pinned against the wall seized the opportunity to elbow Olivia, throwing her off balance and knocking the gun from her hand.

Olivia grunted as she fell to the floor. She raced for her gun, but she felt powerful arms wrap around her waist, pulling her back. She twisted around in his grasp and brought the heel of her hand squarely into his chin before bringing her knee up into his groin.

"Run, Alex!" she yelled. The intruder doubled over in pain, but somehow still maintained a grip on Olivia. He only had her by the ankle, and she was twisting and stretching for her fallen weapon.

"Go, Alex. I'm right behind you!" she yelled. Alex didn't want to leave Olivia to fight for her life. She stood up and looked at Olivia, too frightened and stunned to do much more than that.

"Get the hell out of here, Alex! Now!" Olivia yelled again. Alex went for the door, but couldn't make herself go through it.

"You'd better be right behind me, Olivia," she said, as she saw Olivia break free of the intruder's grasp. Olivia started to run, grabbing her gun as she did, and standing after the first couple of steps.

"Go, Alex, go!" Confident that Olivia would be safe, Alex threw open the door and ran out into the night. All she could feel was the concrete underneath her feet as she ran for her life. Glass from discarded bottles was tearing up her feet, but she barely noticed the pain in the cool night. She ran with her usual grace, her movements using up all of the energy the extra adrenaline in her system was providing. She just knew she had to go, in spite of the fact that she was in her pajamas and afraid for her life. She knew Olivia was behind her. There was no way she hadn't left. She started to feel the pain in her feet, and blood was trickling down the right side of her face from the gash the gun pressed to her head made. After 2 blocks, Alex finally slowed down and turned behind her, expecting to see Olivia running behind her. Instead, she saw no one. She twisted her head, looking everywhere for the brunette.

"Liv? Olivia?" she called.

_**Oooo…evil BensonFan711 and her cliffhangers! Stay tuned to see what's in store for Alex and Olivia, and what happened to Olivia.**_


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

_**I'm so happy to see so many of my Lioness readers following this story! And, to my new AO readers, welcome! I'm glad that all of you are enjoying the story so far, but I wanted to share a review with you first. This one comes from Angel's Beebo:**_

"_**Clearly we're going to have to set some ground rules for our new relationship.**_

_**Rule #1: Cliffhangers are bad. Very, very, ranked up there with root canals**_

_**bad. Rule #2: Awesome writing and quick updated. Very, very, winning the**_

_**lottery good."**_

_**Well, here's the deal. I really, really like cliffhangers, so I can't promise there won't be more, but, I do update quickly, so I won't leave you hanging for long!**_

Olivia grimaced as consciousness slowly returned to her. She tried to sit up, but lifting her head a fraction of an inch caused pain to rip through her forehead and pierce her eyes. She felt groggy and disoriented. She was lying on a table or a bed of some sort, and her wrists and ankles were tightly bound. She remembered the struggle in Alex's apartment She had killed one of the intruders, and there had been a struggle with the second. She had told Alex to run. Had she? Olivia couldn't remember. Olivia had been free. She was on her way out the door, but as she struggled to gain her balance, the intruder had once again grabbed her by the ankle, causing her to stumble forward again. He had pulled on her ankle and pinned her arms behind her back, and then nothing. Nothing, until she woke up here. She hoped Alex had gotten to safety, but the worst part of everything, worse than the excruciating pain she felt was not knowing what had happened to Alex. She tried to talk, but an incoherent moan was all that slipped past her lips.

"Well, well, well…look who's awake," an unknown male voice said.

"Who are you? What am I doing here?" Olivia asked, terrified.

"Shhh, don't be afraid Olivia. Everything is going to be alright." The man walked over to her and gently place two fingers on her forehead. He bowed his head and closed his eyes. "Heavenly Father, you have sent us your child, Olivia, to be called back to a life of grace. Be with her, and with those trying to help her, as she rediscovers what her nature and duties are as a woman. In the name of your son, Jesus Christ, this we pray. Amen."

"What…" Olivia started.

"It's ok, Olivia. God has sent you to us to reform your evil ways," he said.

"My…evil ways?" she asked.

"Yes. You are in violation of God's most sacred laws every time you lie in bed with another woman. But, you can learn your place as a woman, and we will teach you," he replied.

"Thanks, but no thanks. If I'm living in sin, then I choose to continue that, so untie me and let me leave," Olivia said.

"I'm sorry. You feel that way now, but we have a divine charge to carry out here. Matthew, Chapter 28 tells us 'Then Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you,' and Olivia, you have violated His commandment that a man will be with a woman and vice versa," he said. Olivia's stomach was churning. What on earth did he mean by 'teaching' her? "You can be corrected, Olivia. You'll see."

Olivia struggled against the restraints holding her down. She wanted to get out of there, and back home to Alex. _Alex,_ she thought. She hoped that Alex had gotten away and that she wasn't lying in another room like this. The room had institutional white walls, and there was a huge crucifix hanging on one wall. She could never figure out what was so inspiring about seeing a man, who had clearly been tortured and killed in an excruciating manner, hanging on a wall. Wouldn't it be more inspirational to see a happy Jesus, or a wise Jesus, or a pensive Jesus? Right now, all it did was creep her out.

"Ok, Olivia, I need to give you this, and then we'll get you settled into a room," the man said, holding a syringe over her. Her eyes widened and she squirmed, trying to avoid the needle.

"No!" she yelled as she felt the needle prick her skin. There was a slight burning sensation in her arm as the drug entered her body. Almost instantly, she felt relaxed. Her ability to fight was nearly non-existent. She felt the bonds on her limbs coming undone. She was helped up by the man with her and led out of the room.

XxXxX

"Alex, have a seat," Captain Cragen said. Alex sat in the chair next to Elliot Stabler's desk. Elliot had also been called in for this case. It was his partner that was missing, and it was better than he hear from Alex what happened rather than find out in the rumor mill in the morning.

"Ok, Alex, take us through what happened," Cragen said.

"Yeah, ok…" she said, still shaking.

"Take your time," Elliot said. She swallowed, hard.

"I heard a noise that sounded like it was coming from the living room," she began, "and Olivia is always the one who handles things like that. She had the guy. She was in the process of arresting him."

"What went wrong?" Elliot asked.

"There was a second intruder. He grabbed me, and she…she…" The tears fell from her eyes. She slumped forward in the chair, crying into her hands. Captain Cragen put a hand on her back. He had seen numerous women cry in his office, but seeing the strong attorney break down like this provoked an emotional attachment he wasn't used to. Not to mention the woman she was crying over was Olivia Benson. The SVU squad was unique, and the Captain felt responsible for all of them, and he had grown fond of each one of them as people.

"I know it's hard Alex, but what did she do?" Elliot asked.

"The other man held a gun to my head, and there was a standoff. She waited for her opportunity, and she shot him. His body is still on the floor of my apartment as far as I know. The other one took the opportunity to fight against Olivia, and she struggled with him. She told me to run. I saw her get away. She was right behind me. I swear, she was, but then, I turned around, and she was gone. Oh God, where is she?" Alex said, tears continuing to streak her face.

"We'll find her, Alex," Cragen said. "First, we need to get you checked out, and we'll send CSU over to your apartment. We'll get her back, Alex."

XxXxX

Olivia stood up. She felt groggy and disoriented from the drug. She could move, but her desire to fight was literally gone. She allowed herself to be led down the hall after she had been fitted with a set of prison restraints. She was indeed in a hospital of some sort. She as led to a room with two other men where she was told to strip and shower. As she shed her clothes, the eyes of the men on her burned into her. She felt like piece of meat. They gathered her clothing and placed it in a bag. The whole process felt like intake at a prison. They searched her body, probing every orifice. The touching was not completely professional, as it would be in an actual prison. Some if it was overtly sexual. She just wanted to sleep.

She got into the grimy shower and washed herself as best as she could with the soap provided. The water was lukewarm, which suited her just fine, because the slight chill was helping her stay awake. When she dried her self off, she was handed a set of clothes in the most obnoxious shade of pink she had ever seen. There was a blouse, bra, panties, and a skirt. A pair of matching pink heels completed the ensemble. Olivia had never in her life worn anything remotely resembling this.

"This is your uniform. For the duration of your stay, you will wear this. Clean ones will be provided as needed. We'll show you to your room now," one of the men said. They slapped the prison restraints back on her and led her down a different hallway. The corridor was lined with door with tiny windows, about the size of a mailbox slot, near the tops of the doors. Her escort stopped at one of them and opened the door using a key from the ring set on his belt. He pushed her inside and slammed the door behind her. She turned back into the room. There was another man there, but this one was dressed in a bright blue button down and matching pants.

"Hi, I'm Josh," he said, introducing himself.

"Olivia," she said. "What is this place?"

"Let me guess, you're a lesbian," he said bluntly.

"Um, yeah…" she said.

"It's fine. I'm gay," he said. "And these whackos think that we can be turned straight."

"Yeah, I was getting that impression," Olivia responded. "But you can't change someone's orientation."

"You know that, and I know that, but we're dealing with religious zealots who think they can change us," he told her. Olivia started examining the room, trying to determine if there was any way she could escape. Josh chuckled at her.

"Don't bother," he said. "This place is an old psychiatric hospital. There's no way out. Look, you might as well try to get some sleep. You'll need it for tomorrow." Olivia looked at the furniture in the room. There was one queen sized bed.

"Are we supposed to…" she asked.

"Yeah. They think that by rooming men with women in a room with one bed will encourage us to have sex with each other, which is the ultimate goal of all of this." Olivia's eyes widened. "Don't worry," Josh said quickly. "You're cute, for a girl, but I'm completely turned off by females, no offense." Olivia relaxed.

"None taken. Just so you know, I pretty much feel the same way about guys," she said.

"Then look, I'll stay on my side of the bed, and you stay on yours. And we sleep. Just sleep," he said, emphasizing the word 'sleep.' Olivia cautiously crawled into the bed. She was absolutely exhausted and wanted to sleep more than anything. Josh's presence made her more than a little uncomfortable, but the powerful effects of the drug were quickly taking over, and she felt her body slip into a state of a blissful, dreamless sleep.

_**Thank you for reading, and a special thanks to those of you who review. I always appreciate hearing what you think, and the reviews inspire me to update even faster. So, go on, click that blue button and tell me what you think!**_


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**I got the following review from SVUBensonFan111, and there have been others like it:**_

"_**I a not a lesbian, but I know lesbians. You can't just change who they like. Poor Liv:( and Alex:((( so good, update soon:)"**_

_**I know many gays and lesbians, including myself, so I am very familiar with how it works. If you are in any way concerned about where this is leading, please refer to Chapter 1, when Liv and Alex are talking about the last case Liv was on. That should clear a few things up. And I say this because I encourage you all to keep reading.**_

Olivia woke the next morning to the door of her room being flung open. The door landed with a bang as it hit the wall, causing both Olivia and Josh to bolt up right. In the doorway stood a man and a woman, both clad from head to toe in black. They looked down on Josh and Olivia with an air of authority, and each was holding a collar. Josh immediately scrambled to his feet and rushed towards the woman, kneeling at her feet. He kissed her high heeled boots.

"Good morning, Mistress," he said, as she fitted the collar around his neck. She clipped a leash to him and led him out of the room. Olivia was still in bed, pulling the covers up around her, paralyzed by what she had just seen. The man approached her bed. She continued to scurry away as best as she could.

"It's ok, Olivia, I'm not going to hurt you, but you have been assigned to me. It's your first day here, so we'll mostly be going over the rules and what is expected of you during your stay here. First things first, you will call me Master, and you will obey my commands without question. Failure to do so will earn you punishments," he said, studying her every move. "Now, come here and kneel, just as you saw Josh do." Olivia's mind raced. She saw the open door, and all she could think about was escape. She leapt from the bed, threw her elbow against the man who claimed to be her Master and barreled out into the hallway. Instantly, two stronger men grabbed each of her arms and held her in place. She struggled and tried every move she knew to shake them off of her, but their grip was too tight.

"Take her to the Orientation Room," the Master said, reaching out to stroke her face. She turned her head away from his touch, but his voice wasn't harsh. It was more…sympathetic?

Olivia was dragged down the corridor and led into a padded room with a single wooden chair in the center. The two men forced her into it and secured her wrists and elbows. There was another strap at the top of the chair for her neck, but they left that one undone. Once she was restrained, they turned and left the room. Olivia pulled at the straps, testing their strength. After what seemed like hours to her, the Master entered the room. He silently walked behind her and slipped the white leather collar around her neck, sweeping aside her hair. He inserted a small padlock into the tiny ring on the buckle and locked it into place.

"I don't want to hurt you, Olivia. I just want to teach you. Now, I'll forgive your earlier transgression, but only because you are new. Next time, I won't be quite so forgiving," he said. He reached out to stroke her hair again. "You are quite beautiful, and I don't want to do anything to mar that lovely skin of yours."

"I already said last night that I don't want to be here. If I'm living in sin, then I choose to continue to do so," she said. He chuckled.

"I'm afraid that isn't how it works here. Isaiah is the only one who can determine whether or not a release is warranted, and right now, you are not ready to be released," he said. "So, I'm going to explain our program to you, so that you will be aware of what is expected of you.

"We'll start slow. In the beginning, we focus on oral training. Your mouth was designed to provide pleasure just as much as any other orifice, and you will learn how to properly use it on a man. After that, you'll graduate to vaginal training. Women lack the proper equipment to seek and gain pleasure from the vagina, but we can teach you how it is properly used. Then, you'll graduate to anal training. Some men enjoy anal sex, while others don't, but you should know how to do it properly for your future male mate." Olivia's eyes widened at that last part. She didn't like anything back there. Alex had tried, once, to use her finger on Olivia in that way, and Olivia had had no interest in it. Because Alex loved her, she had never tried it again, and both women were perfectly content with their sex lives the way it was. A single tear slid down Olivia's face.

"Don't cry, pet. I know it seems terrifying right now, but you'll be eased into everything that's expected of you." He gently reached over to her face to wipe away the lone tear from her cheek.

"Now, I'm going to undo your bonds. I want you to kneel on the floor in front of me. If you fail to do so, we're going to have to take a trip over to the punishment room, where you will receive your lashes. The number and type will be determined by how long it takes you to comply," the Master said. He studied her face. She was going to run. He could see it in her eyes. This was one who would not learn her lessons the easy way. Sure enough, the minute her last bond was undone, Olivia threw herself to the door, trying to wrench it open, but found it locked securely.

"Olivia," the Master said calmly. "On your knees, pet." She looked back at him. He hadn't made a move towards her. Instead, he simply stayed in his place, passively observing her actions. She struggled harder at the door and banged on it as loud as she could, screaming for help. The Master checked his watch. She had been flying around like a caged animal for seven minutes now. She was examining the cracks between the door and the door frame to see if she could pry it open, but the heavy door was as secure as anything she had seen. She turned and slumped against the wall, curling herself into a ball. The Master walked over to her and towered over her.

"Kneel," he repeated. It was an act of defiance for her. Whatever happened, she would not kneel at anyone's feet. She absolutely refused.

"Fine," the Master said. He hauled her to her feet and flipped her against the wall. He cuffed her hands behind her back. "Have it your way," he whispered into her ear. He threw her over his shoulder and carried her out of the room. She continued to kick and squirm, but they way he held her prevented her from actually striking him. He took her to the room across the hall. He undid her cuffs and strapped her to a set of restraints against the wall. Her feet were pinned apart as far as he could stretch them and her arms were pinned in a similar manner, leaving her entire back exposed.

"How is everything, Luke?" another male voice asked.

"She's a fighter," the Master replied, "but you know I like a challenge. Especially one so pretty." The other voice chuckled.

"She is gorgeous. The men are going to be falling over themselves trying to get to her once we're finished here. Listen, is there anything you need?" he asked.

"She's going to need a new uniform," Master Luke replied.

"No problem. I'll make sure we have one sent down. Carry on," he said, turning to leave.

XxXxX

The emergency room doctor had bandaged the gash on Alex's head and sent her home with a clean bill of health. They had also scrubbed the incisions on her foot, making sure that no broken glass remained and swabbed them with disinfectant. Elliot had waited for her in the waiting room and was now driving her back to her apartment.

"You did everything right," he said, trying to break the deafening silence in the car.

"If I did everything right, then why is Olivia missing? Why didn't she get away too?" Alex asked. Elliot didn't want to tell her that Olivia _had_ made a mistake. If she had swept the room thoroughly, she would have seen the second intruder before he had the chance to grab Alex.

"Sometimes, these things just happen. There's nothing we can do to control or change them," he said.

"How can you be so calm?" she asked.

"Alex, I'm worried sick about her. She's been my partner for over 12 years. There's very little she doesn't know about me and that I don't know about her. Yes, I want her back, but getting worked up about it now isn't going to accomplish anything," he replied. This was so unlike Elliot. He couldn't figure out where this sense of serenity was coming from when Olivia, _his_ Olivia, was out there somewhere, at the mercy of God knows who. But, Alex was here now, and he needed to make sure she was taken care of because when Olivia came back, she was going to need Alex desperately. If she came back.

Elliot walked Alex up to her apartment. The place still had crime scene tape over the front door. Elliot lifted the tape for Alex and led her inside. Alex had been to many crime scenes and knew what to expect, but knowing and seeing are two very different things. Fingerprint dust littered almost every surface in her home, and yellow numbered tags sat next to blood spatters and disturbances. Photographs were still being taken. Alex made her way to the bedroom, careful not to disturb any of the evidence. She saw a set of small fingerprints on the wall. _Olivia's, _she thought. They had to be. She swallowed the lump in her throat and continued on. She was only here to collect a few clothes and necessities until they lifted the crime scene status from the apartment.

She pulled a small suitcase out of the closet and placed a few suits for work, jeans, comfortable tops, and underwear into it. She went to the bathroom and took her toothbrush, hair brush, make up kit, and other toiletries. She paused at the bathroom sink. Olivia's toothbrush was sitting in the lost next to where Alex's had been. She grabbed the handle and took it to Elliot.

"I hope you don't need this, but…" she started, handing him the toothbrush.

"Olivia's?" he asked, searching her eyes. She nodded. "Thanks, Alex. I log it in, and we'll have it on file if we need it." Elliot really didn't need the toothbrush. Olivia's DNA was already on file from when she had her DNA tested in order to find out if she had any family members. The search had ultimately led to her finding Simon Marsden. Still, he knew that Alex needed to feel useful, so he accepted it anyway.

"Are you ready to leave, Alex?" he asked.

"Just about," she replied, returning to the bedroom. She quickly glance around, making sure she had grabbed everything she would need. Her eyes fell on Olivia's pillow, still rumpled on the bed from where she had left it when she went to investigate. Alex picked up the pillow and sniffed it. Olivia had this thing with Alex's pillow. She swore it had a special scent, and when Alex couldn't personally be in bed with her, she insisted on using Alex's pillow. Alex understood now. Olivia's pillow smelled like Olivia. She tucked the pillow under her arm and took it with her as she dragged the suitcase into the living room.

"All set," Alex said. Elliot escorted her out of the apartment. Before she closed the door, she looked around the apartment that she had seemed so lonely when she moved in. And then, Olivia had come in, and now, it felt like home.

_Please come back to me,_ Alex thought as she pulled the door closed behind her, following Elliot into the night.

_**Had to go back and play with Alex for a little while. We'll find out what's going on with Olivia soon enough. Now, go ahead, click the little blue button and tell me what you think. I love hearing from you, and it makes me want to continue writing!**_


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**I realize that this story isn't going to appeal to everyone; however, this is the type of stories that I write. My long-time readers know that Liv tends to have a pretty rough time in my stories, but it's the healing process that I love to write about. For my new readers, I hope you'll stick around for the rest of the story, because there will be much more to come.**_

**Chapter 5**

Olivia cringed as she remained strapped to the wall. She knew that she had made a mistake, and now she would pay for it. Although, if she had to do it all over again, she wouldn't have changed a thing. No matter how far she twisted her head, she couldn't see what was happening behind her. She heard Luke approach her from behind. She felt cold metal on her back, followed by a cool breeze. The unique crunching sound indicated that her clothing was being cut off of her with a pair of shears. When he reached her collar, he turned the shears and angled them to cut up her left sleeve. She felt the garment slip away, clinging to her by the right sleeve only, which he proceeded to cut off in the same manner. The shredded fabric billowed to the floor. Then he took the shears and started at the bottom of her skirt, and cut until that, too, fell away from her body. Two more snips, and her bra fell to the ground when he undid the clasp, and two more at each of her hips left her completely naked and exposed in front of Luke.

Olivia was biting her lips and squeezing her eyes shut as tightly as possible. Her body was tense from anticipation of what was to come. Luke walked over to the wall where whipping instruments of various sizes and shapes were displayed. He didn't want to tear up her back, just cause her pain and discomfort. After pondering his options for a moment, he chose a wide whip, made from doeskin, which would make a nasty crack against her back, but wouldn't break the skin. He removed the implement and walked over to where she was, placing his body flush against hers. He caressed her arm with his free hand and whispered into her ear.

"I don't want to hurt you, Olivia," he whispered to her.

"Then don't," she replied softly.

"I have to. You have to be taught how to be a proper wife, and Ephesians 5:22-24 says 'Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.' You have failed to submit, so you must be punished accordingly," he said. "Now, you fought for 9 minutes, so you have earned 9 lashes."

He backed away from her slightly and tested the weight of the weapon in his hand. He took his stance and let the first blow fall against her back. As expected, a satisfying crack resounded through the room. She jumped as the whip connected with her skin and cried out. A bright red line already lit up her back. He pulled the whip back and let another blow fly across her back, creating a lopsided X pattern. Another red line popped up. He followed with a third, fourth, and fifth blow in rapid succession. The first few lashes were already starting to turn purple. None of the skin had broken, but she was going to be uncomfortable, and the bruises from that particular whip could be pretty painful. After a brief pause, he continued with the sixth, catching her off guard. He let the seventh, eighth, and ninth fall about a second apart. He placed the whip in the used bin, where the cleaners would take it to be sterilized.

"Now, we're going to try this again," he said, undoing her bonds. "Kneel." Olivia shielded her nude form with her hands, but remained standing.

"Olivia, look around. I have the freedom to use anything in this room on you in anyway I choose. Kneel," he stated again. Olivia looked around the room. She saw the display of whips of various shapes and sizes, from wide and soft to narrow and form. They were accompanied by floggers, paddles, and canes. A series of shelves on the opposite wall held dildos, vibrators, and anal plugs of all sizes, as well as a wide selection of nipple clamps. There were also a few devices that she didn't recognize immediately, even with her vast sex crimes experience, and she was sure she didn't want to know what they did.

She was breaking. Luke could see it in her eyes as she studied her surroundings. He wouldn't kill her, but she didn't know that.

"No," she said almost inaudibly. Luke nodded his head.

"I didn't want to do this, Olivia, but you won't incur the punishment for disobedience this time," he said. Olivia was confused. She had been mentally preparing herself to take another beating in exchange for her refusal.

"What?" she asked, confused.

"She will," he said, pulling out a cell phone and showing her the picture displayed on the screen. Alex. "She just arrived, and from what I understand, you two know each other." Olivia's mouth fell open. She was so sure Alex had gotten away. Were they trying to manipulate her? Or did they really have Alex? And did she want to take that chance?

"Ok, fine. When I'm beating her, I'll tell her it's your fault, and I will leave marks on her," Luke said, turning towards the door.

"Wait," she said, her voice choking. She could endure whatever was thrown at her, but Alex shouldn't have to pay the price for her rebellion. She wouldn't be able to live with herself if Alex suffered any pain at all because of her.

"Change of heart?" he asked, turning back towards her. She lowered her right knee to the ground, followed by the left one, covering herself as much as she could, defeated.

"Well done," Luke said, stroking her hair. "I'm so proud of you." Olivia wanted to throw up all over his shoes. "Now, do you think we can keep this up?" he asked. She nodded slowly. "Alex will be pleased to hear that." Her ears burned at the sound of Alex's name. He picked up the pile of fresh pink clothes and handed them to her. She took the clothes from him and dressed herself.

"Come on," he said, taking her gently by the arm. He fitted the prison restraints to her body once again and led her to another part of the ward. She was led to a room where she was greeted by a male nurse.

"Andrew, Olivia just earned her first punishment. Will you make sure she's ok?" Luke said. Andrew nodded.

"I'll be back when your finished," Luke said.

"Where were you hit?" Andrew asked.

"My back," she answered.

"Ok, take off your blouse and lie down on your stomach." Olivia was too tired to fight, so she did exactly what she was told.

"Well, he used one of the gentler whips on you," Andrew commented as he began to cool her back. The coldness felt wonderful and took some of the sting away. "You're only bruised. I've seen some of their work. They can leave nasty welts. My advice to you is that you just do what they tell you to do. Otherwise, that beautiful body of yours is going to experience a hell of a lot more pain."

XxXxX

"Here we are, Alex," Elliot said, opening the door to the hotel room she would be staying in until her apartment was ready. Alex dropped her suitcase and the pillow on the bed.

"Thanks," she said.

"Do you want me to stay?" he asked.

"No, no. I think I'm just going to soak in the tub and try to grab some sleep," she said.

"Ok, well, make sure you keep your phone handy in case Olivia tries to call," he said. She nodded. She was choking up, but she didn't want to cry in front of Elliot. It would only make him want to stay, and she just wanted to be alone. Elliot studied her face. He could see the pain etched on it. Olivia did the same thing; she always insisted she was fine when all she wanted was to be alone.

"If you need anything, call. I mean that, Alex. Day or night," he said. She nodded again. Elliot left the room, off to start doing what he could to find Olivia.

Alex ran a bath as she slipped out of the grimy clothes she had been in all night. It was nearly dawn, and she had barely slept. She lowered herself into the tub and sighed as the warm water permeated her pores. She could feel all of tension slipping out of her body into the water. The tough façade she had been trying to keep up all night long was dissolving. Sobs echoed off the tile walls of the small room as her grief overwhelmed her. She didn't even try to hold back anymore. Her small frame shook with every sob, sloshing the water over the side of the tub, drenching the bathmat. She cried until there was nothing left to cry, and a sense of serenity came over her. Her heart still ached for Olivia, but she had needed the emotional release. It was then that she noticed the water had gone cold. She emptied the tub, and stepped onto the bathmat, wrapping a terrycloth robe around her body. She padded into the bedroom and opened the suitcase. She had a set of pajamas in there, but her eyes fell onto items thrown in almost as an after thought. She donned the T-shirt that swam on her and cinched the drawstring on the pants that hung loosely over her hips. She always thought she and Olivia were roughly the same size, but being in Olivia's pajamas reminded her that the detective had a fuller body than she did. She stowed the suitcase in the closet and turned down the bed, placing Olivia pillow at the head. She grabbed her cell phone and set it on the other side of the bed, nestling her cheek into Olivia's pillow. The scent was there, but she missed the woman it had come from. She stared at the phone, willing it to ring, until her eyelids grew heavy, and she drifted off to sleep.

_**Loved it? Hated it? Let me know! I do take reviews into account when I'm writing because I want to make sure I have answered all of your questions within the story. Personally, I hate when authors leave me hanging with open storylines, so I try not to do it to my readers. As always, feel free to follow me on Twitter as BensonFan711.**_


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**I have a review to share with you from sidle13. Welcome back! I recognize the name from your Lioness reviews!**_

"_**Those who still believe that women are submissive to men are monsters and**_

_**completely crazy !**_

_**More ! :)"**_

_**I agree with you. **____** And I'm using this perspective to emphasize how misguided this cult or whatever we're going to call it is.**_

**Chapter 6**

"How is she?" Luke asked, entering the infirmary, just as Olivia was buttoning her blouse.

"She's fine. We soothed her back a little, but she's going to be in some pain for a while. None of her skin was broken, so there's no risk of infection," Andrew answered.

"Is she all set, then?" Luke asked.

"Absolutely. You can take her anytime," Andrew said. Luke walked over to Olivia an placed her back in the prison restraints.

"It's almost noon. You must be starving," he said, stroking her hair. Olivia wished he wouldn't do that. There were only two people in the world she permitted to touch her in that way. Alex, of course, but there was also something about the bond that she and Elliot shared that made it ok for him, too. Of course, when Elliot touched her like that, it was generally right after she had narrowly cheated death.

Olivia contemplated her options. She was absolutely starving, considering the last time she ate was when she and Alex had dinner early the night before. Had it really been less than a day? She wanted to say yes, but maybe that was what they wanted. Maybe they were looking for something else to hold over her.

"Um, no. I'm good," she said. Luke shrugged.

"Suit yourself," he said. He took her gently by the arm again and led her back to the room they had just left. As they were walking, Olivia caught a glimpse of a thin, blonde woman from behind. Her stomach dropped. They really did have Alex. She recognized her anywhere.

"Kneel," Luke said, after closing the door behind him. Olivia hesitated. Luke raised an eyebrow and sighed. "Don't think I won't haul that cute little blonde's ass in here and beat her senseless." Olivia wouldn't dare risk the safety of Alex, and Luke knew that. Again, she slowly dropped to her knees.

"Good girl," Luke said. Olivia hung her head so that her brown hair covered her face. Luke walked over to her and turned her chin up so she was looking up at him. He gently ran his thumb over her lips before hooking it to her bottom lip, forcing it into her mouth. She resisted the urge to clamp her teeth on him as hard as she could.

"Suck," Luke said. She did what he asked, causing a grin to seek its way across Luke's face. She was going to be fantastic. There was already raw talent running through her little body. He withdrew his thumb from her mouth. Luke walked around the room, selecting various pieced of equipment. Olivia didn't want to even try to guess what he was up to. She had seen too much in her career, and she didn't want to let her imagination run away with her.

Again, he took her by the arm and led her down the hall to a room she hadn't been in yet. Inside was a large television and a chair that actually looked comfortable. Luke placed the equipment he had brought with him on the small table in the room. He picked up the gag. It had a small, 4" dildo attached to it. Luke took it by the base and walked over to Olivia.

"Open," he commanded, holding it to her mouth. She clamped her mouth closed. Luke pinched her nose with his free hand and even though she struggled, he maintained his grip. Finally, she opened her mouth to breath and she took the opportunity to shove the device in. He pulled the straps behind her head and secured them in place with a small padlock. He struggled again with her, and eventually managed to bend her over the table. With his hand on her back, he was able to effectively prevent her from standing. He lifted her skirt and pushed her panties aside, testing her wetness. She was dry.

He picked up the tube of lubricant and expertly flicked off the cap with one hand. He placed a small amount on her and massaged it until she was slick enough for what he wanted to do. He picked up the small device shaped like an egg and inserted it into her, pulling her panties back over it.

He took her over to the chair and had her sit. Again she struggled, but he overpowered her. He undid her wrists one at a time and secured them to the straps on the arms of the chair. She looked so good trussed up like a Christmas turkey, and he wasn't done yet. He turned on the TV, and heterosexual porn images flooded the screen.

"I'm going to leave you to watch this. Considering it a learning opportunity. Watch what the girls on the screen do, and practice on that fake cock between your lips. Consider this your first official lesson. Oh, and to make sure you don't fall asleep, you'll also be dealing with this." Luke flicked the switch on the small remote in his hand. Olivia jumped as the small device inside her started to vibrate, hard, against the spot that Alex loved to caress. "Feel free to come," Luke said. "You don't have to control that until later in your training."

Luke pulled the door closed behind him, leaving a squirming Olivia in the chair. He went into another room where he could see everything she was doing from a closed circuit camera. Already she was experiencing discomfort. The images on the screen were doing their job, as he could see her face flush and twist with desire. He wasn't quite sure if it was the hetero images on the movie or if she was picturing being with the hot girl on the screen, but right now it didn't matter. She would be desensitized to seeing women sexually soon enough.

She was twisting her hips, trying to adjust the vibrations to where she needed them. She was incredibly turned on and her primal instincts were taking over her body, in spite of her disciplined mind trying to stay in her head instead of between her legs. Even still, she couldn't resist letting her tongue play along the device wedged between her lips. She thought of Alex. Her smooth porcelain skin and how she had the skill to make it crinkle with goosebumps or flush bright red or turn purple from love bites. Alex's voice, which nearly made Olivia come simply from moaning alone, especially when it was coaxed from deep in her throat, telling Olivia that she loved every movement the detective made.

Olivia wanted the blonde's head between her legs, teasing her, licking her, drawing orgasm from her the way only Alex could. But most of all, she wanted to feel safe and be with a partner she trusted. Her guard was still up, as much as she could keep it. She wasn't sure what would happen next. These guys wanted to keep her off guard. They were permitting her pleasure now, but who knew what lay in store for the near future? Who know if…no, not if…when they would hurt her again? But for now, all she could do was enjoy the delicious sensations that were encompassing her body, centered on the vibrations between her legs.

XxXxX

Alex reached for Olivia in her semi-conscious stated and met nothing by cold sheets. She opened her eyes and noticed her cell phone where Olivia would have been sleeping, exactly where she had left it before she fell asleep. She picked up the phone and checked for messages. Nothing. Olivia hadn't managed to get to a phone yet. What had happened to her? Had the men who broke into their home kidnapped her? If that was the case, where did they take her? Alex turned onto her back and sighed. She felt helpless. She wanted to find Olivia, but she didn't even know where to start. She knew that Elliot would do everything he could to find her, and he was better equipped to do so, but she still wanted to help in some way.

She jumped at the sound of her phone, not sure how long she had been laying there daydreaming.

"Liv?" she asked, hoping that she would hear the detective's voice on the other end of the line.

"Sorry, Alex. It's Elliot. I was just calling to see how you were doing," he said.

"Oh, um, thanks. I'm doing ok," she said, unconvincingly. "Have there been any leads?"

"We're still looking," Elliot replied. Alex knew that was cop speak for no. She closed her eyes and tried not to imagine the worst. "Did you get any sleep?"

"Yeah, a little," she replied.

"Look, I have a lunch break coming up. I thought I might pick up some sandwiches and bring you lunch," he said. He really was sweet. Alex was starting to understand why Olivia liked Elliot so much, and just how great of a friend he could be.

"I'd like that, but what about Liv?" she said.

"Don't worry about the case. There are plenty of people working it. Alex, I just want to make sure you're ok," he said. He heard her sigh in relief. "I'll be over in about an hour. How does that sound?"

"That sounds great. I'll see you then," she answered, hanging up the phone. She wavered back and forth between wanting company and wanting to be alone, and honestly, Elliot was the only person who had even a hint of the amount of pain she was experiencing from the loss of Olivia.

_Where are you?_ Alex thought.

_**Poor Elliot. Poor Alex. They both miss their Benson. The case is still stone cold on their end though, so how is this going to be resolved? Keep reading to find out! Oh, and please take a minute to review. Thanks!**_


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**And today's review comes from MHFan11794, who I also recognize as a Lioness reader. Thanks for staying with this!**_

"_**Hmmm...now where did I leave my pitchfork...*looks around* OH! Here it is! Be careful, BensonFan711, as much as I want this to be impaled in Luke, it may end up in your chest if you don't update soon!"**_

_**Is this soon enough for you?**_

**Chapter 7**

Elliot was all the way at the counter of the sandwich shop before he realized he didn't know what Alex liked. He knew all of Olivia's preferences by heart, but it occurred to him that he knew almost nothing about Alex. Time for him to put his detective skills to work. Olivia would have gone for something hearty and delicious, and then covered it up with vegetables in a vain attempt to convince herself that she was eating properly. She spent enough time running after perps and working out in the precinct gym that it really didn't matter what she ate, but Alex was a different story. Elliot knew from conversations with Olivia that the two of them had very opposite tastes. He grinned, knowing exactly what to order her.

XxXxX

"Elliot, hi," Alex said, swinging the door open. She had thrown on a pair of jeans, but she was still wearing Olivia's T-shirt. For some reason, she hadn't been able to bring herself to take it off. Her hair was swept half-heartedly off of her face. There was a disheveled look to her. Elliot had only seen her as the composed attorney, and he had to admit that it disturbed him to see her this way.

"What did you bring?" Alex asked, peering into the bag. She could smell meatballs.

"Meatball for me, and veggie for you," he replied. A smile flew across her face. That's exactly what Olivia would have picked up for her if she had been the one to make the run. The smile disappeared from her face as quickly as it had appeared.

"What's wrong?" Elliot asked.

"Nothing," she replied.

"No, really, what is it?" he asked.

"It's just…that's the exact order Olivia would have placed, only she would be the one scarfing down the meatball sandwich," she answered. Oh. Of course he knew that. When they ordered out for the precinct, he always got two of those. He didn't know how to convey it to Alex, but he missed Olivia almost as much as she did.

"Alex, we're going to find her. You have to believe that," he said, reaching out to touch her hand.

"I know. It's just so hard without her here. I mean, if she were in the hospital because of some work related thing, I think that would be easier because at least I would know where she was, but this…" she trailed off.

"Look, Alex, she could be fine. You don't know that she's been hurt. You have to stay positive. You know that's what she would want you to do," he said.

"I know, I know. I keep telling myself that over and over again, hoping that eventually I'll start to believe it," she said. She wiped a tear away from her cheek. "Well, don't just stand there, this food isn't going to eat itself." Elliot sat down in the chair across from her and began to eat. He just wanted to turn the clock back 48 hour to when he and Olivia were chasing down their latest perp, side by side. She had gone home to Alex, and him to Kathy after finally closing the case. If she had been on duty that night…no, he couldn't let himself go there. She had saved Alex, and now he would save her.

XxXxX

Luke was really enjoying watching Olivia squirm. Her face was flushed, and she was clearly reaching a state of ecstasy. She was exactly his type, too. Tall, brunette, brown-eyed, with a killer hourglass figure to match. He desperately wanted to throw her onto the table and show her what a real man can do, but that would have to wait. She wasn't quite up to that yet. He knew he shouldn't enjoy working with his clients as much as he enjoyed this. Detachment was important, but she turned him on so easily. Even her feistiness was appealing to him. It was too boring if they rolled over and played dead too quickly.

He heard her moaning through the gag, and he could see her body twisting, seeking some kind of touch, some kind of release. She was teetering on the edge, but she could quite seem to get herself over that cliff. Of course not. She would need additional touch to achieve that, and he was happy to oblige.

"Olivia," he said, entering the room again. Her eyes fluttered open. Her body was incredibly tense, and she tried to calm herself down, but he had seen her keyed up. "It's ok," he said, releasing the ankle chains from her.

"Spread you legs, hon," he told her. She hesitated. She didn't want this man near her, but at the same time, her head was ready to explode from the lack of release. She wasn't sure how long she had been trying to achieve orgasm, but it seemed like it had been far too long. She spread her legs as wide as her position would allow.

Luke slipped his hand up her skirt and under her panties, never taking his eyes away from hers. God, she looked good, especially with that gag in her mouth. He hated when women made too much noise. He found her clit and began rubbing small circles around it. Her eyes drifted closed as another moan tried to slip past the gag. Her head fell back, and her eyes closed as she surrendered to the sensations radiating throughout her body, centered between her legs. Her breath was quickening, and Luke knew that she was putty in his hands. He could stop now and bring her back down without giving her what she craved, or he could continue, and watch her melt into a puddle. He chose the latter.

He adjusted his hand and pressed harder and more vigorously on her clit. At the same time, he switched the vibrator to its highest setting. Her body was tightening. She was almost there. Even if she wanted to back down now, she couldn't. Her hips were thrusting, seeking. Her thrusts had gone from rhythmic to erratic. Luke continued his ministrations, and she could hold out no longer. Her body tightened and her back arched as waves of pleasure rolled over her. The gag muffled the scream that wanted to rip past her lips. Luke continued to stroke her through her aftershocks. Her back arched a few more times, each less intense that the one before as she came down from her high. Finally, she stilled, head back and panting. Luke removed his fingers from her body.

"Ah, so you're a screamer," he commented. He undid her bonds and her limbs remained limply where they were. He tipped her head forward and undid the gag, pulling it gently from her mouth. He notices strong bite marks on the dildo, which alarmed him. He wasn't sure if she was trying to bite it off or if it had been a reflex to her orgasm. He didn't want to take any chances. His best bet was to implement a change in plans. Her eyes fluttered open and she was watching his movements, but she was too spent to move or fight. He reached between her legs next.

"Push," he said. She still felt like all of her nerves were firing at different times. All she had to do was give a gentle push, and the egg-shaped device inside her slipped out into Luke's hand. He place all of the items into another bin for them to be cleaned and washed his own hands.

"Don't fall asleep on me, Olivia. You're not even close to being done yet," he said. He hauled her to her feet and took her to another room. There was a bed inside this one.

"There's been a change of plans. You aren't ready for oral training yet. I think you'd probably castrate me with that feisty little mouth of yours," he said, laying her gently on the bed. He started to peel the clothes from her body. Olivia was regaining her senses after having a few minutes to calm down. She realized he already had her blouse off her body, so she twisted and tried to push him off of her, in spite of the face that he was now straddling her.

"Whoa! Look who decided to join the party," he said. "Easy now, lay back. Everything's going to be ok." She continued to twist, fighting harder to force him off of her body. He yanked at her bra, throwing it on the floor next to her blouse. He grabbed both of her wrists, pinning them above her head. He was leaning over her, and she could feel his hot breath on her face.

"No!" she said.

"Hush, Olivia. This isn't going to hurt," Luke said. "Don't make things harder on yourself." He used his free hand to bunch up her skirt. He managed to drag her panties off of her. She tried to twist and contort her legs to keep them on, but Luke was able to easily complete his task. He wasn't going to get the skirt, but it didn't matter. They were designed to be wide enough that they could be easily managed. He freed his erection from the constraints of his pants.

"I know, I know you're scared, hon, but this is how God intended for it to be between a man and a woman. I don't want to hurt you, but you're ready to learn this," Luke said, maneuvering himself into position. He pushed up against her entrance. He could feel that she was still soaked from her orgasm minutes before. She was ready for him.

"Please, don't," Olivia whimpered as a tear slipped down her cheek. He wiped the tear away.

"Shhh…it's ok," he said, giving a slight thrust, pushing into her. She arched her neck and squeezed her eyes shut. Tears were falling from both of her eyes now. Luke pushed farther into her, keeping her arms pinned above her. Luke continued to push into her, pulling back and sinking in a little deeper every time. She was so slick and ready for him. He genuinely didn't want to hurt her, but he had to have her. And she felt wonderful, so hot and slick. He bent down and started sucking on her neck. Her body was betraying her and another moan slipped past her lips.

"That's it, Olivia, let go and enjoy yourself," Luke said against her neck. He was picking up his pace. He brought his free hand to her side and caressed the outside swell of her breast. He massaged it and was delighted to see her nipple stiffen. He continued to work his way inward, keeping up the rhythmic thrusting below. She tasted wonderful. The slight saltiness from her excited body mingled with the sweetness of her perfume. She was so soft and feminine, unlike so many of the women that passed through these doors.

Olivia just wanted him to finish. She had given up on the thought of getting through this without him finishing. And yet, what seemed like hours later, he was still sweating over her. His free hand finished with her breast and slithered farther down her body, searching for her clit once again. She was still sensitive from her first orgasm, and she knew that if he managed to make contact, she would surely explode again.

He found what he was seeking and started to expertly work her flesh. Olivia's breathing quickened. She felt as if electric jolts were firing through her body. It was a mixture of pain and pleasure. Her flesh was sensitive, but ready to go again. _No, _she thought. She didn't want to come under him. Her mouth fell open, and her voice took on a life of its own. She knew she'd never be able to keep herself quiet. She had tried many times, unsuccessfully. Damn, her body.

"That's it, Olivia. It feels good, doesn't it? Let yourself go," Luke said, continuing his assault on her clit. He started kissing her neck again, and by pure accident, he found the spot near her ear that drove her crazy. Another scream ripped through the room as her mind disconnected with her body. Her back arched violently off the bed, and she clenched down hard on Luke. He watched her in the throes of her orgasm, thinking that she just might be the most magnificent creature he had ever encountered.

"Good girl, Olivia," Luke said as she continued her screams and spasms. Her second orgasm was much more powerful than the first one. She held him in a vice grip. Her spasms slowly subsided, and once again she went limp. Luke was close. He thrust a few more times before emptying himself into her. He pulled out and released her hands. Her eyes were closed, and her breathing slowed. Her poor body had expended too much energy. She needed rest.

Luke picked up a blanket and covered her body. She had earned some rest. He gazed at her once more before locking her into the room. She had been absolutely exquisite. If he could tame her, he just might consider taking her for his wife. Not if, when.

_**I know, I'm mean and evil. Leaving all of my readers in suspense. Don't worry…there's more coming, and probably very soon. Reviews make me happy, so please be sure to leave on! You know you want to…**___


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**I'd like to address a review I received from Bella002:**_

"_**Umm, wow! I know Luke's raping Liv and that when raped, your body sometimes reacts, well it does, but she enjoyed it? I thought she was in love with Alex. And he came inside her, uh oh! I hope she doesn't get pregnant from this! I hope Elliot and Alex find her soon!"**_

_**No, Bella, she didn't enjoy it. The point of that is that it's still rape, in spite of the way her body reacted. **_

**Chapter 8**

"_I knew you'd come back. We were always meant to be together," Alex said._

"_I love you so much…" Olivia said._

"_Shhh…I know, honey. I know." The blue eyes communicated volumes to her. There was unconditional love, acceptance, and a connection beyond space and time. Alex was everything to her, and she to Alex._

Olivia stirred. She could feel the wetness between her legs, remnants of what had transpired with Luke. She felt dirty. She felt the small drafts creep across her skin. She was still naked, except for the skirt, and yet she was too exhausted to dress herself. She wrapped the blanket around her tightly, wondering how much more she would have to endure. The dream of Alex had seemed so real, and Olivia would swear that she could have felt Alex's body and spirit right beside her. Now she felt cold, empty, alone.

The door opened and she jumped, pulling the blanket to cover her nakedness. Luke's silhouette loomed in the doorframe, holding a folder.

"Did you sleep well?" Luke asked. She sat frozen like a deer in headlights. He walked over and sat next to her on the bed. She recoiled and curled herself into the farthest corner away from him.

"Relax, I'm just here to talk. I've been going through your file, and I think I may have figured out why you turn to women instead of men," he said.

"I can already tell you why I'm attracted to women. I was born this way," she spat.

"No, Olivia. You are choosing to live this way. Now, it says here that your mother was raped, and you were the product of that coupling, is that right?" He spoke casually, but her blood ran cold. How could he possibly know that? That was a piece of her history that she kept well hidden from everyone except those she was extremely close to. "So your mother hated men, raised you by herself, and taught you to hate them in the process, but you can learn," he said. He had leaned over her and his face was hovering inches over hers.

XxXxX

"What happened here, Judy?" Elliot said, lifting the crime scene tape in front of Alex's apartment. Flashes from cameras were going off in the apartment as marked evidence was photographed for the file.

"You're perp forced his way in the front door," Judy began, showing Elliot the scratches on the lock and door.

"Captain!" one of Judy Siper's techs called.

"Excuse me," she said, going to see what he was showing her.

"Thanks," Elliot said, heading over to the other person he wanted to talk to in the room.

"Melinda?" he asked the woman over the fallen body in the apartment.

"Single gunshot wound. The bullet completely severed aorta. He bled to death in seconds," Warner informed him. "The bullet is consistent with a standard issue NYPD service weapon."

"Olivia killed him," Elliot said.

"It looks that way," Warner replied.

"Then what went wrong?" Elliot asked, looking around the room.

"Elliot," Judy said, motioning for him to join her. "We found several prints on this wall. Olivia pinned your perp here while she tried to make her arrest. There are scuff marks on the floor, indicating a struggle took place. Olivia's fingerprints are also on the floor."

"What were her hands doing down there?" Elliot asked.

"She was crawling," Judy said. "She tried to get out, but he was quicker than she was. She was going for this." Judy handed Elliot a white box. He knew what was inside without even looking. It was Olivia's weapon. He tried to stay in cop mode.

"Ok, Olivia, tell me where you are," Elliot said so softly, it only sounded like a mumble to the other is the room.

"What was that?" Judy asked.

"Nothing," he said.

"Any idea who our mystery body is?" Elliot asked Warner.

"No ID. Just this," Warner said. She handed him a piece of cardstock roughly the size of a playing card. On one side was a picture of a crucifix, elaborately illustrated. The other side had a Bible quote. Psalm 31:5 "Into thine hand I commit my spirit: thou hast redeemed me, O Lord God of truth."

"He knew he was going to die," Elliot said. Elliot thought back to the case that he and Olivia had just closed, with the rapist trying to "correct" lesbian. He had also been carrying a similar card with a different verse. The one he had had was from Isaiah. Something about fear.

"Who knew he was going to die?" came a voice from behind him.

"Alex, you shouldn't be here," Elliot said to the blonde standing behind him.

"It's my apartment, and she's my girlfriend. I have every right to be here," she said.

"Alex, come on, I'll take you back to the hotel," he said, taking her by the elbow.

"No, Elliot! What are you hiding from me? Is she…did they kill her?" Alex asked.

"No, no, don't think that. As far as we know, Olivia's still alive. Alex, this is going to sound weird, but have either of you received any anti-gay messages or threats recently?" Elliot asked.

"What? No. I mean, this is New York. There are always your neighborhood crazies ranting on about some sort of evil in the Bible, but nothing personally," she answered. "Why?"

"It may be nothing, Alex, but I have a hunch," Elliot said.

XxXxX

Olivia wasn't sure what made her do it, but she brought the heel of her hand square against his nose. He fell back, shocked, blood pouring from his face. She grabbed the blouse from the floor as she ran out the open door, holding it to her chest. She made turn after turn, hoping she could find an exit somewhere.

Luke pulled himself up from the bed. He underestimated her again. She was going to pay for that one. He tore off after her, pressing an alarm as he went. The klaxons blared, and Olivia's heart began to pound even harder. The entire staff would be alerted to her escape attempt. She turned a corner, and a man stood in front of her, ready to grab her. She turned and headed in the opposite direction before he could get close enough. Now a woman was in front of her. They had her pinned. She sized both of them up. The man was 6'5" tall and had a good 75-100 pounds of solid muscle on her. The woman was smaller, about Olivia's height and closer to her weight. She could take her. She lunged for the woman to fight her way passed her. Before she could land a blow, huge arms grabbed her by the forearms. The man had her in a vice grip, and the more she struggled, the tighter he gripped her.

"Are you ok, Veronica?" Luke asked, coming around the corner, taking a minute to check on the female Olivia had lunged for.

"I'm fine. That's one little spitfire you've got there, Luke," she said. "She should be fine." Veronica gave Olivia a sneer and headed in the opposite direction.

"Where do you want her?" came the gruff voice of the man holding her.

"Take her to Punishment Room 3. It should be free right now," Luke said. Olivia kicked and fought, trying to free herself, but the man holding her easily lifted her and threw her over his shoulder. He carried her back to the punishment room.

"Suspension cuffs," Luke said, indicated to an area on the right side of the room. Olivia never gave up fighting, even though it was a useless battle as her arms were wrestled above her head and locked into place. Luke turned a wheel on the wall, and she felt her arms pulled over her head. He kept turning and her body was stretched farther and farther upward. He stopped when her toes were barely scraping the floor. Luke walked over and backhanded her face.

"You little bitch," he said.

"Now you're going to understand what real punishment is."

_**Oooo...another evil BensonFan711 cliffhanger. I heard "Bully" isn't that great, which airs tonight, so I wanted to give you, my readers, some good SVU if TPTB won't. **____** Oh, and please leave a review. **____** Thanks!**_


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**This review from Arron008 caught my attention:**_

"_**LOL Didn't we already discuss the whole cliff hanger thing?**_

_**Thank you for the quick updates but Him Hurting Liv sucks."**_

_**Yes, we did discuss the cliffhanger thing, but I don't follow rules very well! I will say this, though. I follow several stories on , and at least I update quickly. So, here's your answer to the cliffhanger.**_

**Chapter 9**

Elliot was driving Alex back to her hotel when the call came in over the police scanner. They were calling for homicide detectives. A body had washed up in the East River. Caucasian female, 40-50 years old, brunette. There was no sign of sexual assault, which is why SVU hadn't been notified.

"Elliot," Alex said. Even though the call had come through completely in police code, Alex had spent enough time around cops to decipher the meaning of the call.

"It's not her, Alex," Elliot said, even though he was thinking the same thing she was.

"Please, can we go down there? I have to know," she said. He should have said no. Every instinct in him told him not to take Alex down there. If it wasn't Olivia, then they still had to find her, and if it was, well, Alex shouldn't have to see the woman she loved like that.

"I can't," Elliot said.

"If your wife was missing, would you want to go?" Alex asked. Elliot gave her a quick glance before turning the wheel to head to the crime scene.

When they arrived, teams had already gathered, including the medical examiner's team. One of Dr. Warner's assistants was handling this particular case, and a white sheet already covered the body.

"Elliot Stabler, SVU," Elliot said, flashing his badge with Alex following two steps behind. "Let me see the body," he said, approaching the white sheet. Alex took a deep breath, bracing herself to face her worst nightmare. The doctor pulled back the sheet. Alex let out a strangled cry and collapsed into Elliot's arms as sobs overtook her.

"It's not her, Alex. It's not her," he said, stroking the blonde's back. Relief mixed with fear swept over her. There was still hope. Olivia might still be alive.

XxXxX

Olivia braced herself to be flayed alive. Maybe she would bleed to death. Maybe one of her wounds would get infected with something that would kill her. Maybe she would pass out quickly from the pain. There had to be a way out, whether it was through a door or death. She only hoped she wouldn't feel too much pain. Luke was working behind her back.

"I'm sorry," she said. "It was a mistake. I shouldn't have tried to run." Maybe if she could apologize and win his trust, she could escape the brunt of her punishment.

"I'm pleased to hear you say that, Olivia, but you still need to be punished," he said, eerily calmly. She felt him walk behind her. He lifted her right foot and held it firmly. An animalistic scream tore from her throat as she felt the entire bottom of her foot being burned. Luke had heated an iron and was now holding it to her foot, causing the flesh to hiss as it was scalded. He rocked the iron, making sure to catch every square inch of her foot.

When he was satisfied with his work, he repeated the process on her left foot. Olivia continued to scream and she tried to pull her foot away, but his grip was too strong for her. It was over in minutes, but it felt like hours to Olivia. Luke returned the iron to its previous home and went back to lower Olivia. As her feet bore more and more of her weight, the pain shot through her. Her feet still felt like they were on fire. Luke released the cuffs and she fell to the floor to try to relieve horrid pain in her feet.

Luke walked over to Olivia and cradled her in his arms. She couldn't stop the tears coming from her. The burning in her feet was more pain than she thought she could bear.

"I know it hurts," he said, stroking her hair. "But that's what happens when you try to run." He scooped her into his arms and carried her back to the infirmary for the second time that day. The nurse cooled her feet, which had pretty nasty second degree burns. She had them in a bath of cool water to try to stop the burning in her skin. Blisters were already beginning to form on the bottom of both of her feet. No matter what she did, she couldn't relieve the pain. The nurse dried her feet and placed a soothing ointment on them before wrapping them both in clean, dry bandages.

"You'll have to bring her back in here at least twice a day for a bandage change, and we need to keep an eye on her feet to make sure they don't get infected," the nurse told Luke. "And she should stay off of her feet as much as possible." Luke pulled Olivia into his arms and returned her to her room. He set her down on her bed and called for a tray to be delivered. It had been well over 24 hours since she had eaten, and her stomach was rumbling, and she had the headache that went along with lack of food. Another nurse delivered a tray with a simple meal, and as much as Olivia wanted to eat, she refused.

"Olivia, you're going to have to eat to keep your strength up," Luke said. Again, she refused. "If you think you can starve yourself, think again. I can have you restrained and force fed, if necessary. Although, I did notice you're carrying a few extra pounds on your stomach, and I like my women with flat tummies." He left the tray and walked out of the room, leaving Olivia alone with her own thoughts. There was a barred window in her room. Night had fallen.

Josh returned shortly after Luke left. He took one look at Olivia's feet and gave a small chuckle.

"You tried to run, didn't you?" he asked.

"Um, yeah. It didn't work out too well," she said. Josh showed her to bottom of his own feet, which still bore the imprint of the bottom of the iron.

"I did, too. My first day," he confided in her. "Trust me, it's a lot easier if you just do what they tell you to do. Go along with it, as horrible and disgusting as it is."

"Is that what you do? Just roll over and let them do whatever they want to you?" she asked.

"After I spent the first 10 days being punished more than anything else, yeah. At least it doesn't hurt as much as being whipped, or burned, or waterboarded, or whatever else they can dream up," he told her. "You'll want to die. You'll be in more pain than you ever thought possible, but they won't kill you. They just let you suffer."

"How do you get out of here?" she asked.

"All I know is that's up to Isaiah. Supposedly, when we're 'straight,' they'll let us integrate back into society," he explained.

"Ok, so how do you prove to them you're straight?" she asked.

"Good question. I've tried everything I can think of, but they still won't let me out. Listen, Olivia, you seem like a really nice person. I don't want to see them hurt you. I'm telling you, for your own sake, just suck it up and do what they ask," he said, climbing into bed. Olivia rolled over, her mind filled with the words Josh had just spoken.

XxXxX

Elliot prowled through the evidence locker until he found what he was looking for. He located the box marked "Jacob Glasgow" and opened it. All that it contained were his clothes and the single prayer card, virtually identical to the one they found on the dead body in Alex's apartment. The image was different and the Bible verse was different, but he was sure the paper was the same. Only the crime lab would be able to tell him for sure.

Jacob's card did indeed contain a verse from Isaiah. Isaiah 41:10, to be exact. "Fear thou not; for I am thy God; I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness." Elliot compared this card to the one from Alex's apartment. Both contained verses from the King James version of the Bible. He needed the results from the crime lab comparing these two cards, but first, he had a visit to make.

XxXxX

Alex paced the hotel room. Elliot had dropped her off hours ago. She had tried watching TV, a hot bath, a walk, anything she could think of to relax herself, and yet, she couldn't. She picked up Olivia's pillow and held it close, inhaling the scent deeply. The scent was starting to fade, but for now, she could still faintly smell the detective on the fabric. What would she do if the smell faded before Olivia was found? And what if Olivia was found dead? These were the thoughts that plagued her as she drifted off into a fitful sleep.

_**I had to give everyone an update after that piece of garbage that was "Bully." I had hope to have this update done yesterday, but my migraine had other ideas. So, here it is, as quickly as I could get it to you. More to come, and please, remember to review. **___


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**I'd like to dedicate this chapter to someone I consider a dear friend and loyal reader on Twitter, AssyMcBigPantss. I admire you for your courage and bravery, and I'm glad to see you back on Twitter!**_

**Chapter 10**

Olivia placed one foot in front of the other, hissing in pain. She was still gripping the side of the bed for support. She had slept, somewhat, but if she was going to have any chance at winning the upper hand, she was going to have to be able to walk. She let go of the bed and stumbled as the pain ripped through her entire body, starting at her foot. Josh rolled over sleepily to see her stumbling around the room.

"What exactly are you doing?" he asked.

"Trying to figure out how to walk," she said without breaking her concentration. She swore as she fell again.

"They won't make you walk anywhere with your feet torn up. Just wait for them to heal," he said, sitting up.

"There has to be a way out of here," she said. "And I'm going to find it."

"Olivia, it's not worth it. Trust me on this. If you try to run again, they'll break your feet." Olivia glanced at him to see if he was kidding, but his face was deathly serious.

"Is that what they did to you?" she asked.

"Yeah, and they never healed quite right. Listen to me, there is a way out of here, and we can find it if we work together, but they aren't going to trust either of us if you keep fighting them." He was pleading with her with his eyes. Olivia was considering his words as Luke and the woman she had seen the previous morning entered the room. Josh once again knelt at the woman's feet and kissed them. Luke eyed Olivia as Josh was led out of the room.

"Kneel," he said. Olivia swallowed hard, Josh's words still ringing in her ears. Slowly, so as not to hurt her burned feet, she lowered herself to her knees. A slay smile crept across Luke's face.

"Good girl," he said. "I see yesterday wasn't a complete waste of time." Luke picked her up and threw her over his shoulder, carrying her back to the bedroom she had been in the day before. He gently laid her on the bed and batted her hands away she tried to stop him from removing her clothes.

"Please don't do this again, please…" Olivia pleaded.

"Shh, Olivia, it's ok. I'll take care of you," Luke said as he started laying kisses on her face and neck. Olivia felt her body responding, and it disgusted her. Luke's tongue played at the spot behind her ear that sent electrical currents of pleasure shooting through her. She wanted to fight him, but she was afraid of what the consequences would be. This man had had no problems holding a hot iron to her feet, and she didn't want to know what he would do if she fought him again.

"Spread your legs, Olivia," Luke whispered in her ear.

"Please don't…" she begged again. She felt his knee wedge between her legs in response. She didn't fight him, but she certainly didn't move of her own accord, either. She felt him penetrate her again, and a fresh set of tears washed over her face. She knew it was ridiculous, but she felt like she was cheating on Alex. No, this wasn't cheating, but Luke was certainly ruining her for Alex. How could she ever share the same bed with her again?

XxXxX

"I need you to explain this to me," Elliot said to Jacob Glasgow, pushing the prayer card towards him.

"What's to explain? It's a Bible quote," he answered.

"But why this particular quote? Are you afraid of something?" Elliot asked.

"I'm not afraid of anything, Detective, because I know the Lord will protect me," Jacob answered.

"So why carry this around in your pocket?" Elliot asked.

"I don't have to say anything to you, Detective," Jacob said, retaining his calm, "and if you would like to continue this conversation, I'd like to have my lawyer present."

"Then call him, because we need to finish this conversation," Elliot said, but first, he would need to talk to the D.A.

XxXxX

Luke pulled out of Olivia again. He watched her as she dressed again, which was awkward for her as she tried to avoid using her feet.

"Come on," Luke said, lifting her up after she had dressed.

"Where are we going?" she asked.

"It's time for you to start working with the other groups. Now, if you misbehave, I will be notified, and you will be punished. Do you understand?" Luke said. Olivia nodded. He took her into a room where a group of chairs were arranged in a circle. He set her gently in one, and propped her feet up in another.

"Welcome, Olivia," a petite woman said. "I'm Ruth. The other should be along shortly." within the next 10 minutes, another seven women were brought into the room. All of them could walk, but some bore lacerations, burn marks, and abrasions. Most looked old, but a few looked fresh. No one looked at her bandaged feet oddly.

"Welcome, welcome, everyone. As you can see, we have a new member today. I'd like to start by going around the room and sharing names," Ruth began by looking at the woman to her right.

"Jenna."

"Denise."

"Andrea."

"Kate."

"Nancy."

"Karen."

"Nicole."

"And I'm Olivia," she answered when her turn came.

"Good. Now that we're all acquainted, let's move on. The purpose of this group is to educate you on the proper role of women. All of you are here because your natural instincts have been disturbed, and you need to be taught what your place is," Ruth explained.

"Now, Olivia, I understand you are a cop?" Ruth said. Olivia nodded.

"Who can explain what the problem is here?" Ruth asked the group. "Karen?" The petite blonde woman spoke.

"A cop is a masculine career. It involves physical activity unbecoming of a woman, and should therefore be left to a man. It also requires a dominant personality, and women should be submissive to men," she said, as if she had rehearsed this speech a thousand times.

"Very good, Karen," Ruth said. "Now, Olivia, what made you decide that you wanted to be a cop?"

"I wanted to do some good in the world. Being a cop was the best way to use my talents to do that," Olivia answered.

"So, this had nothing to do with your mother being raped," Ruth prodded. Olivia glared at her. How on earth did these people know that?

"No," she answered coldly.

"Well, then, there's nothing wrong with wanting to help people. Who can tell us what Olivia should have done?" Ruth asked. "Nicole?" This time a redhead spoke.

"You could have been a nurse or a teacher," she said softly.

"Exactly," Ruth answered. "Or, preferably, you could have married a cop, and done everything you could to take care of his every need. That's how women make a difference, Olivia. Titus 2:5 tells us that the duties of a woman are 'To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.'"

"This is ridiculous," Olivia muttered under her breath.

"What was that, Olivia?" Ruth asked.

"I said, this is ridiculous," she repeated.

"You think that living your life violating God's Holy Word is ridiculous? You can still have everlasting life, Olivia. All you need to do is repent and change your ways," Ruth replied.

"Look, I've never been very religious, and I don't intend to start now." The fire had returned to Olivia's eyes.

"I think I tend to agree with what Olivia said," came Jenna's soft voice. "Shouldn't it be our choice whether we want to repent or not?" Jenna looked directly at Olivia, and there was something about her stare that made Olivia uncomfortable. Ruth stood and walked over to the phone.

"Luke, we're having a bit of a situation. Could you come for Olivia?" She said. She paused before hanging up the phone. The situation continued to escalate with more and more of the women asking questions by the time Luke got to the room. He stood in front of Olivia.

"Did you start this?" he asked. Her eyes met his and flashed with anger.

"Yes," she said proudly, steeling herself for whatever would come next. He took her elbow and dragged her out of the room. Every time her injured feet hit the floor, a cry escaped from her lips.

XxXxX

Alex opened a file from her briefcase, trying to concentrate on the latest case in front of her. She always found it hard to work outside of her home or office, but she would have to make do in the hotel room she was currently in. Besides, anything was better than sitting around worrying about Olivia.

She absently ran her hand through her hair. She had read the same sentence five times and was no closer to understanding it that she had been when she first sat down. She knew that worrying would do her absolutely no good, but every time her eyes fell on the phone, she was praying for it to ring before she could catch herself.

Alex wasn't what anyone would consider extremely religious, but she was facing her worst fear right now. This was worse than anything else. Even if they found Olivia's body, which Alex didn't want to think about, at least then she would know that it was really over. But for now, she was in limbo. Was Olivia safe? If not, how badly had she been hurt? Would she ever see Olivia again? How long would it be before everyone, including her gave up? She didn't want to let her brain take her to those places she wasn't yet ready to face. Needing support from somewhere, she opened the beside drawer, took out the complementary Bible, and began to read.

_**Thank you for your patience. I seem to have come down with a slight case of writer's block. I know I haven't been up to my usual updating speed, but I'm in a bit of a slump. You guys all make my day with all of your wonderful reviews! **___


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**I want to apologize for taking so long to update this story. I didn't forget about you all! I was recently hospitalized with pneumonia, and I have had zero energy until recently. But, it looks like the antibiotics have worked their magic, and I feel great now! Ok, maybe it was the combination of the antibiotics and all of the SVU I watched. Or maybe it was the SVU…because Mariska makes everything better!**_

**Chapter 11**

"Luke, please…" Olivia begged as he continued to haul her down the corridor. He said nothing as she continued to beg and cry out in pain. He dragged her into one of the TV rooms and threw her against the wall. Her burned feet seared from having all of her weight on them. He pushed himself against her, gripping her by the forearms.

"You're a little spitfire. It's one of the things I love about you, but it also gets you into far too much trouble," he said next to her ear. The feel of his hot breath on her caused her stomach to roll.

"I'm sorry," she said.

"Sorry for what you did, or sorry that you got caught?" he asked. She said nothing. "That's what I thought." He released her and led her over to the chair. "Have a seat. Your feet must hurt." As she lowered herself into the chair, he flicked on the TV. Some of the blisters on her feet had burst, causing her even more pain. On the TV, was what looked like a still shot of one of the punishment rooms. Luke fitted the chair restraints around her limbs. She braced herself for more pain, but instead, she heard Luke call over the intercom, "she's ready."

Olivia saw a tall blonde being led into the room on the screen. _Alex,_ she thought. Though she never saw the woman's face, she knew it had to be Alex.

"Luke, wait…what's going on?" she asked, trying to pull her wrists free.

"Well, you seem to have very little regard for your own safety, so someone else is going to bear your punishment," Luke said calmly.

"No, please, no…do whatever you want to me, but leave her alone," Olivia begged. As she pleaded, the guard with the blonde hung her in the suspension cuffs. Luke leaned against the wall, studying her every reaction. Olivia's brown eyes went wide as she saw the clothes ripped from the blonde's body. There was no sound, but the imagery was too much for Olivia.

"Luke, please, I'm begging you…don't let them hurt her," she said.

"Olivia, this is _your_ punishment, not hers. Perhaps you will learn something from all of this," Luke replied in the same calm voice he had before. The man on the screen selected his first implement from the wall.

"Cat o' nine tails. Nice choice," Luke commented. "It warms up the skin, increasing sensitivity, and the longer it's used, the more of a sting it leaves." Olivia watched as the blows fell on the blonde's back. Little by little, her back was reddening, and her body movements indicated that the pain level is increasing. After 20 or so blows, the cat o' nine tails was discarded. He picked up a bullwhip next.

"The bullwhip, another good choice. It's a vicious thing. Cuts through the skin. Leaves deep, beautiful welts. You don't ever forget having a bullwhip on your skin…or in your hand for that matter," Luke said, as the blonde took even more blows with the bullwhip. Angry welts popped up all over her back, buttocks and thighs. Blood dribbled from a few of them. Her lithe body was twisting in pain, trying desperately to avoid the blows that just continued to fall. Olivia could only imagine the sounds coming from the girl's mouth as she writhed in agony. It went on for an eternity. Finally, the blonde's head fell forward, and she was still.

"Is she…" Olivia was afraid to finish that sentence.

"Dead? No," Luke laughed. "She just passed out from the intense pain. Pain, I might add, that you caused her." He walked over and released her bonds. "Kneel, Olivia," he said. Her eyes were still fixed on the screen. Every ounce of her being wanted to resist him, fight him, but she now knew what he was capable of. She couldn't risk Alex's life. After considering her options, she slowly lowered herself to the floor.

XxXxX

"Alex! It's so good to see you again! How have you been?" Alex embraced Rev. Marcus McMillan.

"I'm fine," she said, as he showed her into his office. She took a seat in one of the comfortable armchairs as he sat across from her.

"Alexandra, I haven't seen you in over ten years, and then I get a call from you out of the blue, asking to talk. What's going on?" he asked.

"Well, I…I'm not exactly sure where to start," she began.

"Take your time," he said.

"I left the church because…because I had to figure some things out, and to be quite honest, I wasn't sure if I would be accepted here anymore," she began.

"You are a Child of God. Nothing can ever change that. But why would you think we wouldn't accept you?" Alex gazed into the eyes of a man who she had known for as long as she could remember. He had taught her about Jesus' love and compassion, guided her through confirmation, and been at the helm of the Presbyterian church she was raised in.

"Reverend…Marc…I fell in love," she said, simply.

"That's wonderful, Alex!" he exclaimed, but it wasn't a smile on her face. It was a look of regret.

"Her name is Olivia," Alex finished. Alex braced herself for what was to come. She expected to be admonished and told how immoral and ungodly it was for her to be with a woman. Instead, she saw love in the eyes of her minister.

"I'm happy for you, and I'd like to meet her someday. When and if you feel comfortable," came his response. Alex felt a familiar warmth she had felt when she was a child. No matter what happened, she always felt safe and loved within these walls. Now, over a decade since she left, she still felt the same way. It was still home.

"I…I don't know what to say…" she said.

"Alex, Jesus taught us not to judge. I have counseled many, many people, and I don't believe you choose to be gay anymore than the rest of us choose to be straight. If God has brought someone into your life that makes you feel whole and complete and loved, and you love and complete her in return, who am I to question that? I am but a mere human. I don't question God's ways, only thank him for his many blessings. And, I promise you, that if you were to seek a spiritual home within these walls again, you would find the congregation to be just as accepting as I am," he said. Alex felt more and more at peace with every word he spoke.

"Olivia is actually the reason I'm here, Marc. My apartment was broken into a couple of nights ago. We were attacked. I got away, but Olivia…Olivia is still missing," she said, hearing her voice crack.

"Oh, Alex, I am so sorry. Are there any leads to her whereabouts?" he asked.

"None that I know of. She's a detective with the NYPD, so her disappearance is top priority…that whole thin blue line thing…but…"

"You're scared," he finished for her.

"Terrified," she said, sighing. "The day she disappeared, we were talking about marriage and children…I think she's the one, Marc, I really do, but what if I never see her again?"

"Alex, it's all in God's hands. Trust in Him, and believe in Him. He will guide you through this tragedy. You have to believe that He is with Olivia, too." He paused for a moment. "I'd like to invite you to join us tomorrow morning, if you'd like. It may help to be around familiar faces."

"Thank you, Marc. I'll think about it," she said. The two shared a prayer for Alex's healing and Olivia's safety before Alex left the church. As she walked back to the hotel, she felt a sense of peace that she hadn't felt since before Olivia disappeared. _Olivia's alive,_ she thought, and she knew she was right.

XxXxX

"Good girl, Olivia," Luke said, unfastening his pants. He was already semi-hard. There was something about her exotic beauty that turned him on just by looking at her. "Now, open your mouth." She looked up at him, her eyes wide with fear.

"Open," he said again after a few seconds. "Or we can arrange another punishment." She parted her lips slightly. Luke hooked his thumb around her jaw and pulled it down farther. He took his cock in his other hand and fed it into her mouth.

"Don't you dare bite," he said. "Now, use your tongue and gently massage it. Ohhh…" he grunted. Her mouth felt like heaven around him. He hardened inside her, springing to life.

"Good girl, Olivia, good girl…" he panted. "Now, suck." She added suction to what she was doing as he slid his cock in and out of her mouth. He placed he hands on the back of her head, twisting them into her hair. He guided her up and down his shaft.

"Lick the underside of the head," he gasped, groaning as she swirled her tongue. She felt wonderful, but he had only gone about halfway in.

"Ok, baby, listen to me, because I don't want you to hurt yourself. Straighten your neck as much as you can. You're going to take the whole thing," he said. He felt her shift under him. He pushed farther into her, feeling the back of her throat. She gagged around him, and still he pushed, sliding into her throat, feeling her hot mouth around every inch of him. He held it there, giving small, short thrusts as her eyes started to water, and her gagging continued. Finally, he pulled back and out of her completely. She used her hands to support her as her head fell forward. She gasped for breath. He loved the sight over her on all fours in front of him.

"Don't move," he said as he circled behind her. He lifted her skirt and ripped her panties from her. He inserted a finger, testing her wetness. She wasn't soaked, but she wasn't bone dry either. It would do. He pushed against her entrance. She cried out. He pushed farther into her, loosening her up. Her body yielded to him after his coaxing, and he thrust into her. After having her mouth on him, he was close to finishing. He thrust a few more times before spilling into her. He rubbed her back softly as he pulled out of her.

"So good…" he said. "I'll never let you go."

_**I hope you enjoyed this chapter! I promise, I won't take so long to update again. Being sick really did me in, though. Thank you all for your patience and understanding, and I look forward to all of your reviews! ~BensonFan711**_

_**Also, someone apparently started a fan page for me on Facebook…feel free to "Like" it. I'll be posting from time to time, answering questions, commenting, and whatever else I can think of.**_


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**Ok, so I lied. I had hoped to get a video done, but it was easier for me to write this out than get the video done. I guess I got over my writer's block quicker than my director's block, but this still took longer than usual to write. Hope you enjoy it!**_

**Chapter 12**

Olivia curled into a ball on the floor where Luke had left her. Her body had not been prepared for his onslaught, and she was experiencing the discomfort that followed as a result. She longed to be home with Alex. How long had she been here? It seemed like it had been an eternity, but she knew that it could only be a couple of days at the most. He sat next to her and stroked her hair once again.

"You are so incredibly beautiful, Olivia. No other woman has ever turned me on as much as you do," Luke said to her. Olivia hated the way he touched her, spoke to her, looked at her. She wished he would find some other woman to torment, but he only seemed to have eyes for her. "You're still thinking about your girlfriend, aren't you?" he asked.

"Please, let me see her," Olivia asked in a voice that was barely audible.

"Oh, Olivia, I wish I could, but I can't do that," he answered. Tears began to fall freely from her eyes.

"Please…just for a minute," she begged.

"It's late. I'll take you back to your room," Luke said, gathering her into his arms. He returned her to her room, locked her inside, and walked away as the sound of her sobs echoed through the hallway.

XxXxX

Alex sat in the coffee shop eyeing the church across the street through the storefront window. She needed comfort from somewhere, and Rev. McMillan had made her feel perfectly at home the day before. She knew many of the long-time parishioners from her childhood, and she understood that their hearts were genuine, kind, and pure. They were humble people, who tried to spread Christ's love every way they knew how, and they were quick to leave the role of moral judge to God. Still, the idea of walking into the building, alone, after so many years made her anxious. Perhaps if Olivia were with her, she would feel more comfortable. Then again, if Olivia had been with her, she would not have reached this state of spiritual crisis that caused her to reach out to God in the first place. Still, she wasn't sure she could bring herself to go inside. She exited the coffee shop and headed back towards the hotel.

"Alex? Alexandra Cabot, is that you?" she hear a familiar voice call to her. She turned.

"Joan! It's good to see you again," she admitted. Joan Robinson was about 25 years older than Alex, but she had always been a good friend to her. Alex and her own mother mixed like oil and water, but Joan had stepped in and been the older woman Alex had confided in when she was a teenager. Joan put her arm around Alex's shoulders.

"Are you coming to worship this morning?" she asked.

"I…no, I don't think so…" Alex said. Joan studied her face. She notice the haunted look in Alex's clear blue eyes that had been present since the night Olivia disappeared.

"You look like you could use some guidance, honey. Come, let's go, and then I want to take you to lunch. I haven't heard from you in years, and I want to hear all about what you've been up to," Joan insisted, steering them both towards the door of the church. Alex felt more comfortable having someone with her. It couldn't hurt…services would only last for an hour or so, and it would be good to catch up with people again.

XxXxX

"You owe me for this one, Elliot," Captain Judy Siper quipped in the lab. "But you were right. I analyzed both the prayer card from Alex's apartment and the one found on Jacob Glasgow at the time of his arrest. They're virtually identical."

"Thanks, Judy, and you're right, I do owe you. Any idea where they came from?" he asked.

"They were custom printed at a print shot downtown, Pages & Binding, Ink," she answered.

"You're sure?" he asked.

"Yes, come over here," she said. "I checked the cards for some sort of watermark or identifying information on the cards. I didn't find anything until I hit it with the UV light." She flipped a few switches, and there was the logo, plain as day.

"Judy, you're a genius," he said, turning to leave.

"Elliot, do me a favor, will you?" she asked.

"Anything," he answered.

"Nail the bastard that kidnapped Olivia," she said. Elliot smiled and strode out of the lab on his way to check out the printing shop.

XxXxX

"Olivia, is everything alright?" Josh asked when she woke the next morning. Her eyes looked different. The last time he had seen her, she had life, fire in them. Now, they looked dead.

"No," she said, rolling back over.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked.

"Can I ask you something?" she replied.

"Sure, anything," he answered.

"When you were brought here, did they kidnap your boyfriend, too?" she asked.

"No, but it was dumb luck that they didn't. He was out of town on a business trip the night they broke into our home. But, that was so long ago, he's probably moved on with his life by now. Why do you ask?"

"Because they have my girlfriend," she answered softly. "And yesterday, they beat her senseless."

"Oh my God, Olivia. How do you know all of this?" Josh asked.

"Because they did it in front of me, because of me," she answered.

"I've heard of this happening. They think that you care more about your significant other than yourself, so they'll use that against you. Olivia, listen to me, do what they tell you to do. Otherwise, it's not just your life you're playing with, it's Alex's too," he said, seriousness etched across his face.

"Maybe you're right…" she said.

"Maybe? Honey, I know I'm right! If you really love her, you have to protect her, and unfortunately, that means doing every twisted, perverted thing they want you to do." Olivia listened to his words. She had studied human behavior enough to know that Luke and the others were certainly capable of everything Josh said they were. "Here, put this on," Josh said, tossing her a dress in the same obnoxious pink color as the rest of her clothes. This one seemed a bit more formal than her daily wear, and she was confused.

"Why? What's this?" she asked.

"It's Sunday," he answered.

"So?" she asked, slipping the dress on.

"So, we're going to church this morning," he answered, slipping into his own slightly more formal clothing.

"Pass," she said.

"Um, it not really optional…" Josh said, as the door opened revealing Luke.

"You're already dressed, good. I was coming to tell you that Sundays are a little different. I take it Josh already informed you that we have church services every week?" he asked Olivia. She nodded. He fitted the restraints around her and escorted her out of the room. He took her in an unfamiliar direction towards what used to be the hospital chapel. Without warning, he ducked into a room, tugging her with him by the elbow. He threw against the wall, knocking the wind out of her as she was caught off guard. Luke reached around to cup her breasts through her clothes, pressing his body flush against her back.

"I woke up so hard thinking of you this morning," he whispered in his ear. She closed her eyes. _Not again_, she thought. He started to kiss at her neck while squeezing at her breasts. He moaned next to her ear. She felt his hard length in the small of her back.

"Please don't, Luke. Please don't…" she whispered.

"I can't wait for you to be cured, Olivia. I want you to enjoy this as much as I do," he said, kissing at her again.

"But I don't enjoy it now. Stop, please!" she said again.

"You'll learn to. This is how you learn," he said as his hand slipped under her skirt and tugged her panties off. He kicked her bandaged feet apart and unzipped his pants, freeing his erection.

"We don't have very long, Olivia," he whispered in her ear. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pushed into her entrance. He started thrusting harder and faster into her. Olivia screwed her eyes shut and waited for him to finish. Mercifully, he was quick about it. He helped her put her panties back on, and then he continued to escort her down the hall to the chapel.

Several others had arrived before them. Luke ushered her towards a pew and sat her down. She noticed metal rings on the back of the pew as she took her seat. Luke extracted another chain from his pocket and fitted one end to her restraints and the other to the metal ring in front of her. He draped an arm around her and pulled her to him, as more and more people filed in.

Olivia wanted no part of this at all. She wasn't raised in a religious home, nor did she ever feel any sort of burning desire to seek out religion. As far as she was concerned, she wanted nothing to do with it, and now some form of it was controlling every aspect of her life. She knew Elliot went to church every chance he had. The only reason he was ever not in mass on Sunday mornings was if he was still at the precinct on a case. It helped him deal with the horrors they saw every day, and for that she was grateful. She was eternally thankful that Alex shared her own agnostic views. The hum in the room quieted as a dark haired man stepped to the front of the room and the services began.

_**I know, I know…have Elliot and Alex find Liv….I'm getting there. It's a process though. Things need to happen before I can have her rescued. **____** Please let me know what you think by reviewing! Thanks.**_


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**My brain was in rare form today. I hope you enjoy this chapter…my muse has been working overtime, but won't stay focused on one project!**_

**Chapter 13**

"Friends, I'd like to begin our services this morning with an announcement. Unfortunately, the news I have to share with you is not the kind of news I like to bring into this room. I am sorry to report that our brother, Caleb, was murdered four days ago, carrying out God's will. His murderess is sitting here in this room, among us today. Our sister, Olivia, shot him out of fear when he went to bring her here so that we could help her. We suspected that this would happen when he was charged with the task of bringing her here, but we had prayed for his safe return. Do not weep, my friends, for he is safe in the arms of our Heavenly Father. Even though Olivia has committed a grave sin, I ask each of you to exercise forgiveness towards her and understand that has not yet come to know the beauty of God's love…" Olivia's ears burned. The way he spoke, he made it sound like she had gunned down an innocent man, when he had, in fact, broken into Alex's apartment and kidnapped them. She couldn't listen to this; she didn't want to listen to this.

The preacher droned on and on about the sanctity of love between a man and a woman, and how with enough prayer and training, every single one of them could learn how to live a "godly" life. Olivia looked around as much as she dared, hoping to catch a glimpse of Alex. So far, she hadn't seen the blonde in the chapel, and she feared that Alex had been injured more severely than anyone had though when she was beaten yesterday. When the services finished, Luke took Olivia back to her room. She looked around for Alex, and still saw no sign of her. Josh was also there, but she wasn't sure exactly what was going on.

"Hey, Olivia," he said when she returned.

"Hi, Josh." For the first time, they weren't locked into their room. "What's going on?"

"Oh, Sunday is the day of rest," he answered.

"Meaning…" she prompted.

"Meaning we can basically do what we want to, within reason. There will be minimal staff, but you _will_ be watched, and they will punish you if you try anything. But, there's a library, a TV room, and of course, you can journal," he explained. Josh eyed her. He had figured out how to escape, but it was going to be difficult, especially since she was a cop.

"Olivia…" he began.

"Yeah?" she replied.

"Um, I…I figured out how to get out of here…" he said.

"Really? Tell me," she said.

"I…I don't think it would work for you, but it will work for me. I've been here for a long time, and I've done everything they've told me to do. All I have to do is prove to them that I'm straight, and they'll release me," he said.

"Ok, we knew that, but how do you prove something like that?" she asked.

"Don't you get it?" he asked, as if it should be completely obvious. Olivia's eyes widened as she comprehended what he was saying.

"You want to have sex…with me?" she said.

"First of all, no, I don't want to, but if I do, they'll let me go. Please, Olivia, I just want to go home," he said, looking up at her, begging her.

"No, I'm sorry, Josh, but I can't…" she said.

"It's ok. I understand," he said, leaving the room. Olivia sat on the bed, stunned that he would have ever made such a request.

XxXxX

Alex walked back to the hotel, reflecting on her morning in church…her first morning in church in over a decade. She had gone to lunch with Joan, and she had explained all about Olivia. Joan was thrilled that she had found someone to share her life with, and just as Rev. McMillan had said, she passed no judgement. She was upset to hear what had happened to Olivia, and together they had prayed for Olivia's return. Alex wasn't sure what was happening to her, but she felt closer to God than she had ever felt in her life. She had almost reached the point of realizing that if Olivia was found dead, she'd be ok. Almost.

"Hey, Alex," Elliot said, catching her at the main door of the hotel.

"Elliot, what are you doing here?" she asked.

"I wanted to stop by and see how you were doing," he said.

"That's sweet, really, but I'm fine," she answered, and Elliot actually believed her. She invited him upstairs for a cup of coffee and a visit, which he readily accepted. Truth be told, he missed his best friend like crazy, and Alex was the only one who could understand that sort of longing. On any other Sunday, he and Liv would be camped on the sofa at one of their homes, with the coffee table piled high with junk food and sharing a rather vocal afternoon yelling at whatever sporting event happened to be on. Olivia was one of the biggest jocks he knew, and she could outdrink and outswear any guy he had ever met.

"So, what have you been up to?" he asked.

"Actually, I went to church this morning," she said.

"Oh? I wasn't aware that you did that," he replied.

"It's sort of a new thing. Actually, this is the first time in years I've gone, but I needed to do something in order to cope with Olivia's disappearance. I was reading the Bible the other night, and I felt this strange sense of peace. One thing led to another, and I talked to my former minister, and…"

"And now you need God in your life like you need air," Elliot finished for her.

"Yes," she said. He had been able to give words to what she hadn't been able to before.

"Any word on Olivia?" she asked.

"No, nothing," he answered. He didn't want to get her hopes up with the prayer card. He had already gone down to the print shop only to discover that they were closed on Sundays. He would have to wait until tomorrow morning to talk to them. Alex's face fell.

"Don't give up, Alex. We'll find her. I'm not going to stop looking until I do," he said.

XxXxX

Olivia dozed on the bed. She finally felt able to relax knowing that Luke wasn't going to be pawing at her for the rest of the day. She was still tense, but she was definitely more relaxed than she had been since she got here.

Suddenly, she felt a weight on top of her, and her face was covered with a cloth. She struggled to fight off her attacker, but her limbs felt heavy and weak. Her movements were uncoordinated and ineffective. Finally, she stilled. The cloth was removed, and her eyes focused.

"Josh…" she managed to squeak out. "Don't…" She felt Josh pulling her clothing from her. She wasn't totally paralyzed, but every movement took so much effort. She simply didn't have the energy to fight.

"Olivia, I have to. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," he said as he climbed on top of her. He forced her legs open with her knees, inadvertently leaving bruises on her inner thighs. He pushed into her, tearing her as he did. She hadn't been ready, and he hadn't done anything to help ease the experience for her. She tried to cry out, but it came out as more of a grunt. He palmed her breasts and leaned into towards her ear.

"I don't want to hurt you, and I'm sorry," he said again. He picked up his pace and finally came deep inside her. When he pulled out, he saw a mixture of blood and semen ooze onto the bed. He quickly dressed himself and yelled out the doorway for help. A medic came and examined Olivia. He hadn't done any permanent damage to her, and the drug would wear off, but she would be sore for a few days.

His mistress came to see what the commotion was about.

"You had sex with her?" she asked, motioning to a still recovering Olivia. Josh nodded.

"Why?" she asked.

"Have you seen her? She's gorgeous! I…I couldn't help myself. She's the first woman I've ever been attracted to."

"Come, Josh, we need to go see Isaiah," she said, leading him out of the room.

_**Uhh…wtf? Josh was supposed to be cool! As always, there's a method to my madness! Mwahaha! Keep reading…more to come. **_


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**Looks like my SVU muse is back! I swear, I feel like I've done nothing but write all day today. I hope you all enjoy this chapter, too!**_

**Chapter 14**

"Congratulations, Josh. You are living proof that our program works. I am so pleased to hear that you finally decided to honor your natural calling and choose a life with a female companion. I'll see that you are returned to your home immediately. Go change your clothes, and I'll arrange for you to be taken home," Isaiah told him, handing him a bag.

"Thank you, sir," he answered. Josh took the bag and went into the bathroom to change back into the clothes he was wearing when he was brought here.

XxXxX

Josh stood outside the precinct building for a long time before he could bring himself to walk through the doors. He knew he needed to; it was the right thing to do. He entered the bustling squadroom of the 1-6 and looked around, not really sure who to talk to.

"Can I help you?" an older gentleman asked.

"Um, I hope so. I need to talk to…I'm…uh…" he stumbled.

"Ok, take a breath," the man said. Josh did, and he felt calmer. "Ok, now, what happened?"

"I need to talk to someone about Detective Olivia Benson," Josh blurted out. The older man turned towards a tall dark-haired man.

"Stabler!" he yelled, and motioned for the other cop to join him.

"What is it, Captain?" Det. Stabler asked.

"This young man says he needs to talk to someone about Olivia," Cragen said. Elliot eyed Josh.

"Come this way," he said, leading Josh into one of the interrogation rooms.

"How do you know Olivia?" he asked, after Josh had taken a seat at the table.

"She was my roommate," Josh answered. Cragen was watching the exchange from behind the one-way window.

"Your roommate?" Elliot asked.

"Please, Detective, let me explain," Josh said.

"I'm all ears," Elliot replied.

"There's a group of people…they call themselves the Prophets of Leviticus," he began. "They believe their mission in life is to 'reform' gays and lesbians."

"You're gay," Elliot said. It was a statement, not a question. Josh nodded.

"They…they tried to teach us how to live a straight lifestyle, and once they decide we are straight, they let us out. Olivia is with them," he said. Elliot couldn't believe his ears. He wasn't sure if this guy was for real, or if he was just another lunatic with a crazy story.

"Detective, I know it sounds crazy, but she's there, and she believes they're holding her girlfriend. Alex, I think she said her name was." Now Elliot knew this guy was for real. No one knew about Alex and Olivia except their closest friends.

"Where is this group located, exactly?" Elliot asked.

"They have an old psychiatric hospital in just outside the city that they use. There's no way to escape," he replied.

"So, how did you get out?" Elliot asked. Josh swallowed hard.

"I can't tell you that, Detective, not without a lawyer. But, I care about Olivia. I want to help her because I know she'll get herself killed before she gives in to them," he said.

"Killed? Has she been hurt?" he asked.

"She tried to escape on her first day there, and she earned a punishment for that," Josh replied.

"What sort of punishment?" Elliot asked.

"The same one I earned when I tried to run," Josh said, slipping off one of his shoes and socks. He showed his bare foot to Elliot, which was still scarred with the pattern of the iron.

"What is that?" Elliot asked, examining Josh's foot.

"They burned my feet with an iron. The pain made it impossible to walk for several days." Elliot's stomach churned. Olivia was running around with scorched feet. How could one human being do that to another?

"I spent several months there, Detective. They think I'm straight because I passed their final test, but the truth is, I'm still as gay as I was the day I walked in there. I just figured out how to get out. But Olivia, Olivia is stubborn. They're torturing her, Detective, probably as we speak," Josh said somberly.

"Can you tell us where they are?" Elliot asked.

"Absolutely," Josh said. "But, you can't storm the place. They have eyes and ears everywhere. They'll be gone before you get there."

"Elliot," Cragen said, opening the door, motioning to him again. Elliot followed him into the viewing room.

"If we storm this place, they could kill Olivia, especially if they already know she's a cop," Cragen said.

"What are you suggesting?" Elliot asked.

"We have to send someone in there and get her out quietly," Cragen answered.

XxXxX

Elliot sat at a booth in a diner in downtown Manhattan waiting for his contact to arrive. With Josh's help, they had arranged for him to meet with a recruiter for the Prophets of Leviticus.

"Elliot?" a man asked. Elliot turned his head to see a man standing behind him.

"Hi, Elliot Johnson," he replied, holding out his hand. "You must be Matthew." The other man smiled.

"I am," he said. "We've heard good things about you."

"The truth is, I've heard about what you do, and I have to say that I honestly believe in your mission. Watching people continue to live in sin when they can be taught the way of Christ sickens me," he said. Matthew liked Elliot. He trusted Elliot.

"Would you do what was necessary to help them live a life in accordance to the Bible, obeying God's law first?" he asked.

"Absolutely," Elliot said, dead pan serious.

"I'll be honest, Elliot. Sometimes the things we have to do…are unpleasant. Punishments can get ugly, but it's the only way to teach them," Matthew said.

"I understand," Elliot replied.

"Well, we've received wonderful recommendations for you, and we'd love to have you come on for a trial period," Matthew said.

"Sounds great," he said.

"Good. Come to this address at noon tomorrow, and we'll get you started," Matthew said, tossing some money onto the table and leaving the diner.

XxXxX

Olivia had never felt so betrayed in her life. She had trusted Josh, and now she was lying in bed, still bleeding and barely able to move as a direct result of him raping her. As if being raped by Luke wasn't bad enough…

"Olivia, I heard what happened. Are you ok?" Luke said, leaning over her. Apparently, he had been summoned after hearing what Josh had done.

"Hurts…" she managed to say, grimacing again.

"I know, honey. You weren't ready for him. He should have aroused you first," Luke said.

"The drug will wear off," a doctor said, examining her. "But it will take time. She should rest for at least 24 hours." Olivia didn't understand why Luke was treating her like a human being instead of an animal, but at the moment, she didn't care. She just wanted to sleep, and when she woke up, she wanted to be back home in the bed she shared with Alex.

XxXxX

Elliot arrived at the designated location the next day. He was blindfolded and driven to the old hospital where the Prophets of Leviticus were headquartered. When they arrived, Elliot blindfold was removed, and he was given a tour. He saw the men in their blue uniforms and the women in their pink uniforms, but still no sign of Olivia. Following the tour, he was invited to lunch with some of the other staff. He sat at a table with three other male trainers: Sam, his escort for the day, Matthew, and Luke.

"How's your girl, Luke?" Sam asked sitting down at the table.

"She's ok, but thanks for asking. Who's this?" Luke asked.

"Oh, guys, this is Elliot, a new recruit. Elliot, you know Matthew, and this is Luke," Sam said.

"Rumor has it she's a little spitfire," Sam said to Luke.

"Yeah, she is, but you know what? She's absolutely gorgeous, and she has this quality to her that I can't explain but…" he trailed off.

"You really like her, don't you?" Matthew chimed in.

"Yeah, I do. Maybe when she's straight I can…" he began.

"Don't go there, Luke. It's never good to fall for the ones you train," Sam said.

"Sounds like quite a gal," Elliot chimed in.

"She is. I mean, she's older, but she's still a looker," Luke said.

"I'd like to meet her sometime," Elliot said.

"That's actually not a bad idea. Luke, you were going to run a few standard training exercises with her later, right?" Sam asked. Luke nodded.

"Mind if Elliot tags along? You know, so he can get a feel for what we do?" Sam asked.

"Sure. We can head down there as soon as you've finished eating," Luke replied.

XxXxX

Olivia finished the lunch that had been brought to her. It had taken hours for the drug to wear off, but other than a headache, she felt fine now. She kicked her feet over the side of the bed and tried to stand. Her head swam as she got to her feet, and her feet continued to burn. She fell back onto the bed and put her head between her knees.

The door opened and Luke entered her room.

"Please, Luke, I'm so tired," she said, hoping he wouldn't force her into anything.

"I know, Olivia. I'll take it easy on you today, but you have to behave. I have someone with me, and he's going to be joining us for the rest of the day. You are expected to obey him, just as you are expected to behave me." Olivia looked up and blinked. Now she knew her mind was playing tricks on her because she could have sworn it was Elliot in the doorway.

"Let's go," Luke said, lifting her up.

He carried her back into one of the television rooms and strapped her to the chair. As he strapped her in, he began to talk to Elliot.

"We're going to be working with her on physical conditioning. The purpose of this particular exercise is to teach her brain to associate men with pleasure, and we'll do that by stimulating her own body while she views the images on the screen," Luke explained. Elliot wanted to grab Olivia and run out the door with her, but he couldn't. Not yet. He couldn't expose himself as a cop. Right now, he needed to gather information. He hoped Luke would give him a chance to be alone with her for a moment so he could talk to her and reassure her, but most of all, he wanted to tell her that Alex was safe.

_**Two chapters in a matter of hours…lucky readers! I hadn't planned on updating this soon, but I couldn't bear the thought of you all hating Josh. At least one of them is safe, though!**_


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**Stupid writer's block…my muse went on vacation again. I'm trying to push through it, because that's the best way to overcome it. I do need to address a quick review though:**_

_**This is from **__**XOXOGABBYXOXO11:**_

"_**Really love it, but I'm confused. Does Elliot want to be like one of the**_

_**workers there like Luke?"**_

_**Ummm…no. Elliot's going in undercover. Thought that was clear, but if not, it should be now.**_

**Chapter 15**

"What happened to her feet?" Elliot asked, taking in the stark white bandages that encased Olivia's feet.

"She tried to run. It's standard procedure. All of our punishments have been carefully designed to fit the nature of the crime. I'll make sure you get a copy of our manual later on. For a first escape attempt, we burn the bottoms of the feet," Luke explained.

"That sounds…painful," Elliot commented, trying desperately not to show his contempt and disgust at the clinical way that Luke presented the information.

"It is, but pain is sometimes necessary in order to reach a life closer to God," Luke explained. He finished with Olivia's bonds and gave her hair a gentle stroke. "I need to grab a few things. I'll be right back," Luke said. Elliot immediately went to Olivia.

"Olivia…Liv…are you ok?" he asked. _Stupid question, Elliot,_ he thought. He knew from the haunted, almost dead look in her eyes that a significant amount of damage had already been done, not just physically, but psychologically.

"El, you have to get Alex. Just let me die, but save her," Olivia said quickly. Elliot looked at her quizzically.

"What are you talking about, Liv? Alex is fine," he said.

"No, she's not…they have her in this hellhole, somewhere. Find her, get her out of here," she begged.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa…the night you were abducted, Alex came to the precinct. She told us what happened to you. Right now, she's in a hotel room, under police protection," he explained. Now it was Olivia's turn to be confused.

"No, they…they tortured her. In front of me," Olivia said. "I know it was her. It had to be."

"She's fine. I wouldn't lie to you. Right now, we have to figure out how to…" Elliot stopped as he heard the door opening. Olivia's mind immediately assumed that he was lying to her, but when her eyes bmet his, she knew that he was telling the truth. There was so much that could still be communicated between them without words.

XxXxX

Alex swung open the door to her hotel room, fully expecting to see Elliot, but Fin was standing in the doorway instead.

"Hey, Alex. How are you holding up?" he asked.

"Fine, but where's Elliot? I thought he was going to stop by today," she said.

"He's…unavailable at the moment," Fin answered.

"Undercover?" she asked. Fin sighed. "He is, isn't he? Does this have anything to do with Olivia?" Her heart fluttered. She didn't want to get her hopes up only to have them come crashing down around her, but at the same time, if Elliot was on his way to bring her back, she wanted to know. Fin said nothing.

"Don't lie to me, Fin, and don't hold back," she said. Fin could hear her voice waiver. She was just as much a part of the SVU family as any of them.

"You didn't hear this from me, and I'll deny this conversation ever took place if it comes up, understood?" he asked. Alex swallowed hard and nodded. "Yes, it's about Olivia, and yes, he's undercover."

"Is she…is she ok?" Alex asked, her voice barely above a whisper. As much as everyone else wanted to shield Alex from the horrors that Olivia may or may not have endured, Fin wanted to be straight with her. She deserved it.

"Here's what we know. She's being held in some sort of prison. A witness came forward today and claimed that he was her roommate in this facility. He revealed to us that she has attempted to escape once, and apparently was punished for it," Fin said as Alex sank into one of the chairs. Horror was written across her face. Fin took the chair next to her.

"What sort of punishment?" she asked.

"They burned the bottoms of her feet," he said. Alex felt her stomach start to churn. She thought she might throw up, but she needed to know more.

"Why?" she asked.

"That's just what they do when an escape attempt occurs," Fin answered.

"No, I mean, why her? Why did they take her?" she asked. Her eyes were welling with tears, even though she was fighting tooth and nail to maintain her composure.

"They're religious zealots, Alex. They believe it's a sin to be homosexual, and that it is their mission to 'correct' them," Fin answered. Alex felt a stab in her chest. This was her fault. If Olivia's lover had been a man, none of this ever would have happened. They were torturing Olivia because Alex chose to share her bed with her. Then a startling realization dawned on her.

"Wait…Fin, did they…was she…has she been raped?" Alex asked. Fin paused.

"We don't know. I'm not going to lie to you, though. It's entirely possible," he answered. _Oh, God,_ Alex thought. _She'll never be the same again._ Alex wanted nothing more than to hold Olivia in her arms again, but she was also very much aware that their relationship was not and would not be accepted the way a heterosexual relationship would be. It was so easy for the two of them to be together, and it felt so natural, but the rest of the world didn't process gay relationships the same way.

"This is my fault," she said quietly.

"No, Alex, no. You can't think like that. Look, I've known Olivia for a long time, about the same amount of time that you've known her. In all of those years, I have seen her date off and on, and it was always the same result. Something was missing. She never could figure out what it was. And then, she finally admitted that she was far more attracted to women than men. Alex, it's who she is. If she wasn't with you, she would have been with another woman, not a man," Fin said.

"Then why do I feel so bad about this?" she asked.

"The Olivia Benson I've known since she started dating you is the happiest I've ever seen. She doesn't work all night to avoid going home. She takes vacations. She laughs. You brought that into her life, Alex, you. We've all seen the change in her, and it was definitely for the better. She loves you; never doubt that," he said. Alex desperately wanted to believe the words he was saying, and on some level she did. But on another level, she still felt responsible. She had no idea what condition Olivia would be in when she got back, and she wasn't sure she had the strength to help the fractured, broken Olivia find her way back to the person she had once been.

"I'm scared, Fin," she confessed.

"We all are," he replied.

XxXxX

Luke had returned with a vibrator and a tube of lubricant.

"This particular vibrator will give her orgasms like she's never experienced," he explained. "Her brain will associate those extreme pleasures with men as her training progresses." Olivia was staring at Elliot, silently begging him to do something…anything to prevent this from happening again.

"What other steps in her training have you accomplished?" Elliot asked.

"Well, she knows the proper way to have sex with a man," Luke explained. "She still fights it, but she knows how. In addition to that, she learning the proper way to perform oral sex. Would you like a demonstration?"

"Some other time, maybe," Elliot replied. Luke gave him a puzzled look. Elliot leaned in to whisper to him. "It's not really the sort of thing I like to do when other people are watching, you know what I mean?" Luke smirked and nodded.

"Of course…sex is a private thing. I wasn't suggesting otherwise. But let me tell you…she gives amazing head." Oh, Elliot was going to hell. That was it. He had always been attracted to Olivia, from the moment Cragen introduced them. Did he want her? Yes. Did he masturbate thinking of her? Yes. Did he consider dating her during the brief time he was separated from his wife? Yes. And then it had all changed. She confessed to him that she wasn't interested in men, and that was that. He would never have the chance to be with her. As much as he wanted it, she didn't, and that was ok with him. He cherished their friendship, and decided long ago that he'd rather have her as a friend than nothing at all. He wanted her to be happy, and she was, with Alex. Still, the picture of having Olivia Benson's mouth wrapped around his dick made him shudder. But no, Elliot Stabler dismissed the thought. She wasn't a sex object; she never was. She was the most amazing human being he had ever met, and he was going to do whatever was necessary to ensure her happiness and safety, even if it meant letting her go.

_**I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I'm on my way to New York as I write this. Hopefully, I'll find my muse hanging out with Chris and Mariska, kidnap her, and bring her home with me. If anyone else sees her, please tell her to come home. I miss her greatly. Thanks! Oh, and don't forget to leave a review! ~BF**_


	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**So, I went all the way to New York, and I didn't find my muse hanging out with Chris. I'm pretty convinced she decided to hop on a plane with Mariska to see the new baby, but she's back now! **_

_**And, she won't shut up…between the Correction updates she giving me, she also stuck 4 video ideas plus an idea for a tarot deck in my head. I'm glad she's back, but she needs to slow down!**_

**Chapter 16**

Elliot's mind raced. He could not, in good conscience, watch Luke violate Olivia, but he didn't know what else to do. He was being watched just as much as she was, and any mistake or misstep on his part would blow his cover, and they could both be killed. Their eyes connected once more. She knew his dilemma, and she understood it. He could not be her knight in shining armor.

Luke turned on the DVD and knelt in front of Olivia, lifting her skirt. Elliot watched helplessly as he slid the vibrator inside her. She whimpered. Betrayal replaced the understanding in her eyes. Luke stood and strode over to Elliot.

"What's wrong?" Luke asked.

"Nothing," Elliot replied.

"Then stop acting like someone just killed your dog," he replied. "Trust me, she'll enjoy this." Luke flicked the switch on the remote in his hands and a soft humming sound came from Olivia's general direction. Her eyes fluttered and closed as the sensations swept through her body.

"Come on," Luke said. "There's more for you to see."

"What about her?" Elliot asked.

"Don't worry. She'll be fine," Luke assured him.

As soon as Luke and Elliot left, the tears fell from Olivia's eyes. She had been so sure that Elliot would put a stop to the horrible things she was being forced to endure, and he had stood there and done nothing to help her. Even her own body was betraying her. She couldn't deny that she wanted desperately to be touched at this particular moment, to feel the heated passion she had shared with only one other person.

XxXxX

"So, the next step in Olivia's training will be to break the association between pleasure and women," Luke was explaining. They were standing in one of the equipment rooms.

"How exactly do you accomplish that?" Elliot asked.

"With this," Luke said, holding up a box with wires protruding from it.

"What is that?" Elliot asked.

"We'll connect these lines to her breasts and genital regions, and we'll provide homosexual stimulation. In this case, images of naked women, women engaged in sexual intercourse, etc. This device will monitor her arousal level, and when she reaches a certain point, it will deliver a mild electrical shock," Luke said. He talked as though he was explaining how to set up cable television, but he was describing torture. It was all very clinical and detached.

"Doesn't that hurt?" Elliot asked. Luke smiled.

"That's the point. Her brain will start to associate women with pain instead of pleasure. If done enough times, it will become permanent. Her desire for women will no longer be a part of her," Luke said. Elliot wanted to throw up.

XxXxX

As the days passed, Elliot had shadowed with many of the other trainers in the facility. Olivia had been forced to endure more of her "training," including the desensitization procedure. Elliot never saw her again after that first day. She was beginning to lose hope. He had abandoned her. She was laying on her bed, resting after her most recent session. Her feet were much better, and she could walk with little to no pain, but the rest of her had been battered and broken. The fire in her had all but disappeared, and at this point, she was simply waiting for death. She prayed that it would come quickly. One thing was for sure, if there was a God, he had totally and completely abandoned her, too. The door to her room opened, and she didn't even bother to look up. It just meant that her day was about to switch from sheer and utter boredom to more torture.

"Olivia," Elliot said. Her head raised.

"What are you doing here?" she asked. "I thought you left."

"I tried to come back, but this is the first time they've left me alone since I got here. Come on," he said, motioning for her to come with him. She stood and approached him, still hesitant.

"Olivia, it's me. I'm not going to hurt you," he said, "but we have to go. Now."

"Why, El? Why did you leave me?" she asked.

"Not now, Liv. We can talk all you want later, but right now, we're getting out of here," he said, grabbing her hand. He hurried her down the hallways. They were in parts of the building she hadn't seen, and all she could do was trust him to know the way out. Footsteps. Elliot turned and steered them in the opposite direction. The footsteps were getting closer, and he knew that she shouldn't be in this part of the building. He took her forearms and forced her to look him in the eye.

"Do you trust me?" he asked. She hesitated, looking back down the hallway. Her voice stuck in her throat. "Liv?' he said, drawing her attention back.

"I trust you," she whispered.

"Good," he said, pinning her against the wall. "Act like I'm hurting you." He put his head next to her neck, and to any passerby, it would look like he was kissing her. She threw her head back, twisting her face in pain. She felt a hand on her outer thigh. It didn't move, but she still felt a little uneasy.

"Elliot," the man coming down the hall said. He lifted his head.

"Sorry, I didn't know anyone else was around here," he said.

"What are you doing with her?" the mystery man asked.

"Well…look at her," he said, grinning. He pulled her body flush to his. "What do you think I'm doing?" The man grinned.

"Carry on," he said, turning and heading back down the hallway. As soon as he was out of sight, Elliot focused back on Olivia.

"I'm sorry, Liv, but you don't even want to know what they would have done to you if they found you here," he said, taking her by the hand once more and leading her through the maze of hallways. They made turn after turn. Neither of them said a word. There was too much to say, but at the same time, there nothing to say.

They had reached the main door. Elliot pushed open the door, still clinging to Olivia's hand. She could see the sea of blue and white cars with flashing lights ahead of her. Elliot took off in a full run, never letting go of her hand, with her quick on his heels.

_Pop._

Elliot felt the form behind him fall. He was dragging her. He turned and saw her slipping towards the ground.

"Liv!" he yelled. She had to get up. She continued to fall forward. Then he saw it. The small hole in her back, blood gushing around it.

"Oh God, Liv! Come on, you have to keep moving," he said. She tried to lift herself up and faltered.

"I can't, Elliot. Go," she said. Her face was turning white. Elliot turned towards the sea of cars. He could see uniformed officers with weapons drawn. Another form was running towards them. Fin.

"Fin! She's been shot!" he yelled. Fin paused to survey the damage. He stood between them and the flying bullets, shielding them. Elliot lifted Olivia in his arms. She screamed into the night as the pain ripped through her body. All that mattered to him, though, was getting her to safety.

"No, Elliot," she whispered, even though it was taking all of her strength to speak. "Just let me die." Her eyes closed and her head slumped against him. Ambulances were also present, along with the numerous cruisers. He hurried her to the nearest one.

"Please, save my partner," he said to the nearest paramedic. They eased her onto a stretcher, carefully lying her on her stomach. The paramedics began to work feverishly as Elliot hopped in the back of the ambulance, slamming the doors behind him, and the vehicle speeding towards the nearest hospital.

The monitors around her were beeping erratically.

"Come on, Olivia. Wake up. You have to wake up, for Alex," he said to her. She didn't even stir. His eyes drifted towards the monitor. It was still beeping. _Good,_ he thought. _As long as it's still beeping, her heart is still beating._

Olivia felt nothing. The pain was completely gone for the first time since the night she had been abducted. She no longer cared about anything, even Alex. She just wanted it all to stop. She didn't want to face the long recovery process that was sure to await her if she opened her eyes. No, it was easier just to sink into oblivion.

The monitor that was charting her heartbeats gave a wail.

"Charge to 300!" Elliot heard one of the paramedics yell. "Clear!" A shock leapt through Olivia's body as she jerked off the stretcher. That damn monitor showed no change. "Charge to 360!" the paramedic yelled again. "Clear!" Olivia jerked again.

_Beep. Beep. Beep…_

She was back, but barely.

And Elliot was going to do whatever he possibly could to make sure she stayed. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he was convinced that Alex would personally see to it that he died a very slow and painful death if Olivia died while he was mere inches away from her.

_**Dun, dun, DUN! Oh no, BensonFan711 did it…she put Liv in actual jeopardy. Now what? Ah, well, that will be in the next chapter.**_

_**In other news, Lioness will be published and available soon…probably by the end of the month. To get the latest news on all fics, videos, and publications, be sure to "like" the BensonFan711 fan page on Facebook.**_


	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**Thank my muse, everyone. I think she's been working overtime.**_

_**Now I need to address a review by EOtogetherforever:**_

"_**How could u! Lol. Update soon :) what do you mean by "lioness will be**_

_**published soon"? I thought it was already finished?"**_

_**It is finished, but I've reworked it into a completely original story, and it will be published as an actual book. I should also note that if anyone wants to read the original EO version, you might want to do it quickly because it will be taken down permanently as soon as the book comes out.**_

**Chapter 17**

A soft rap came from the door of Alex's hotel room. Alex groaned. It was only 8:00, but Alex had taken to sleeping whenever she could. At this point, she was awake for about 24 hours, then sleeping for 10-12. She pried herself out of bed at the second insistent knocking.

"All right, all right," she grumbled. She was still wearing Olivia's pajamas and sleeping with her pillow, though the scent had long vanished. She pulled open the door, knowing there were only two people it could possibly be. "Hey, Fin, come on in," she said as she turned to head back towards the bed.

"We found her, Alex," Fin said, as he shut the door. Alex whirled around, suddenly awake.

"Where is she? The station?" Alex said.

"Alex…" Fin started. Alex was already pulling clean clothes out of the hotel bureau.

"Remind me to kiss Elliot next time I see him," she said, smiling.

"Alex, stop," Fin said, placing his hand on her to still her busied movements. "She's at Mercy. We need you." The smile on Alex's face disappeared as quickly as it had appeared.

"What happened?" Alex asked.

"She was injured during the escape," he said.

"How badly?" Alex asked.

"They need you at the hospital," he repeated. Alex raced into the bathroom with a handful of clothes. She reappeared moments later dressed in jeans, a T-shirt, a cardigan, with her hair swept into a quick ponytail.

XxXxX

Elliot was pacing the hospital waiting room. As soon as they had arrived, medical personnel had whisked her away and directed him to wait. His eyes fell on the door just off the emergency room. He knew where that door led. It was a small room where the doctors told family members that their loved one hadn't made it.

_Dear God, _he prayed, _please, please let me stay out of that room._

"What the hell happened?" came the voice of one irate Alex Cabot as she strolled down the hallway. Elliot had seen that look before, many, many times in court, though it was never directed at him. Yep, she was going to kill him.

"She was shot, Alex," he said. It was probably better to be blunt about this.

"Will she…" Alex started. Her voice caught in her throat.

"It's too soon to tell," Elliot replied. And then it happened. Alex's hand connected with the side of his face, leaving a sharp sting.

"You bastard!" she screamed. "I thought you were going to protect her!"

"Alex, I tried…sometimes…sometimes things just happen," he said.

"I need to see her. You," she said, pointing her finger at Elliot, "You I will deal with later." She whipped around and headed towards the desk.

"Family for Olivia Benson?" a middle-aged man dressed in scrubs asked.

"That's me," Alex replied.

"Ma'am, could you step in here for a moment?" he said, gesturing to the door that Elliot had hoped to avoid. Fin and Elliot just looked at each other. They were family, sort of, but Alex was the one who needed to make the decisions. They weren't sure whether to follow or not. Alex turned back to them.

"Well? What are you two waiting for?" she said. Once everyone was settled on the battered couches inside the room, the man began to speak.

"I'm Dr. Monroe. Which of you is Olivia's next of kin?" he asked.

"I am," Alex whispered.

"Ma'am, her condition is critical. She's already crashed three times. It's taking more and more time to bring her back, and every episode presents a greater risk of brain damage. It's time to consider a DNR" he explained. Alex reached over and grabbed Elliot's hand.

"I…I…we…we never talked about this," she whispered. She looked up at Elliot.

"We did," he answered. "A long time ago, after her mother died. She wants to go out fighting." Dr. Monroe's pager beeped.

"She's crashing again. Ma'am?" he said. "I need a decision."

"Save her," Alex said. Dr. Monroe nodded and rushed out of the room. The second hand on the clock echoed through the room. Alex wanted to rip the clock off the wall and throw it out the window.

"She'll be ok, Alex," Fin said.

"Were you just listening to the same conversation I was? Because it didn't sound too sure to me. This whole time, I've been preparing myself for the worst, and then I was told she's alive, and now, I'm being asked to decide whether or not to sign a DNR! What part of that sounds ok to you?" she yelled. She closed her eyes covered her face with her hands. "I'm sorry. I just can't take this anymore." Unexpectedly, she slipped her arms around Elliot's waist and sobbed into his shirt. He wasn't really sure what to make of this; he only knew that he had to be hurting nearly as much as Alex.

"I don't know what to do, Elliot. She gave me power of attorney, but we never talked about what to do and when," she said.

"It's ok, Alex. She and I talked. You're making the right decision, and I'm here for any help and support you need," he said. There was another rap on the door, followed by the appearance of Dr. Monroe. Alex looked up at him with fear etched across her face.

"She's back, but she's still critical. She's being transferred to ICU," he said.

"When can I see her?" Alex asked.

"They're taking her upstairs now, and as soon as she's settled in, you can see her," he answered. The three of them headed up to ICU, where they waited for yet another hour before a nurse finally let Alex into Liv's room. All three of them had wanted to go, but the ICU staff had insisted on one visitor.

Alex stepped into the darkened room. She had been in plenty of hospital rooms in her career, but nothing prepared her for the onslaught of raw emotion that hit her as she entered that particular room. Olivia looked so small and pale with tubes and wires coming from all over her body. If Alex, didn't know better, she would never have guessed that this woman was the same person who could throw a fully grown man twice her size to the ground and arrest him. She pulled the lone chair in the room up to Olivia's bedside and slipped her hand into Olivia's.

"Olivia?" she whispered. No response came from the form on the bed.

"She's been given a sedative, miss. She'll be out for a while," a nurse said as she checked Olivia's vitals.

"Olivia, I don't know if you can hear me or not," Alex began, "but I love you. I love you so much. I'd say I can't imagine a day without you, but I've just spent the last month without you, and I know I never want to do that again. I don't know what you've been through, but it's over now. Whatever you need, we'll get through it together. Just please don't give up on me."

Somewhere, deep in the back of Olivia's consciousness, she heard the pleas of the attorney. Could it be true? Could her nightmare actually be over? Suddenly, she wasn't so sure she wanted to let go anymore. She wanted to see Alex, even if it was just for one more time. But, oh, she was so sleepy…she couldn't open her eyes. _Stay next me,_ she tried to say to Alex. _I need you._

An unintelligible groan slipped past Olivia's lips.

"Sleep, sweetheart, I'll still be here when you're ready to wake up," Alex said. "I'm going to leave you for a couple of minutes, but I'll be right back." Alex went back out to the waiting room.

"Hey," she said, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear. "You guys should go in. She's going to be out for a while, and I'm planning to stay here until either they throw me out or I take her home." Fin went first.

"Hey, girl…" Fin started. "I have no idea whether you can hear me or not, but you've gotta know that everyone is rooting for you. We all want you back safe and sound. Remember when we were in Sealview? I had your back then, and I swear to you, I'll do whatever I can to help you again." He paused, knowing that she wouldn't answer him. "Ok, then…I think Elliot's coming in, and then Alex will be back. I'll swing by to see you tomorrow." Fin gave her hand a quick squeeze and stepped back out to the waiting room.

"Hey, man, need a lift home?" he asked Elliot.

"Yeah, just give me a few minutes, first," he said, heading for Olivia's room.

"Hey, Liv…I'm so sorry about…about all of this. But Liv, I know you. You're so much stronger than I think even you know. I wish…I wish I could have protected you back there. Please, Liv, please hold on. You have no idea how much I've missed having you as my partner. Don't make me break in a new one," he said. He thought he saw a faint smile cross her face, but maybe it was just a trick of the lights.

Elliot and Fin said good-night to Alex, after she once again, insisted that she would be fine in the hospital by herself.

"Guys, seriously, I'm going to curl up at her bedside and crash. I'm exhausted; she's exhausted. I promise I'll call if anything changes." Alex said.

"If you need anything…" Elliot began.

"I know," she said. "And thank you." Alex crept back into Olivia's room. One of the nurses had brought her a pillow and a blanket, and the chair in the room unfolded into a flat, but uncomfortable, surface. Alex curled up on it, slipped her hand into Olivia's, and slept soundly for the first time in a month.

XxXxX

"She was lucky," Fin said as he drove Elliot home.

"What do you mean? She's barely alive," Elliot said.

"After you left with her, we raided the facility. Every single captive there was dead," Fin told him. Elliot drew in a sharp breath.

"They were all executed after she escaped. What about Isaiah? Or Luke? Or any of the others?" Elliot asked.

"Gone." Fin replied.

_**Oh, cliffhanger…yep, I'm mean, but then again, you wouldn't keep reading if you weren't enjoying the story! More to come soon, I promise.**_

_**To get the latest news on all fics, videos, and publications, be sure to "like" the BensonFan711 fan page on Facebook.**_


	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**I apologize for the delay in updates. The proof copy of Lioness came in, and I've been working like a crazy person to get the manuscript edited and back to the printers. Once again,**__** I would like to note that if anyone wants to read the original EO version, you might want to do it quickly because it will be taken down permanently as soon as the book comes out.**_

**Chapter 18**

"Gone?" Elliot asked. "What the hell do you mean, 'gone?'"

"Vanished. It's like they were never there. Warner and her team are going to be sifting through that body farm for months," Fin said.

"How…how were they…" Elliot could quite figure out how to ask the question in his mind. However, he had worked with Fin long enough that he didn't need to finish it.

"They were all shot at point blank range. It looks like it was a completely organized massacre. Then the ones with the guns high-tailed it out of there, and before you ask, we haven't figured out how yet." Elliot let out a breath he didn't realize he had been holding. In the uneasy silence, Fin spoke again. "You got Olivia out. Right now, you have to focus on that."

XxXxX

Alex woke to the sound of whimpering next to her. Her hand was still firmly lodged in Olivia's but it was being squeezed, and hard. She sat up, noticing that her muscles were stiff and aching from the chair she had been sleeping in.

"Liv?" she asked softly. The brunette next to her continued to whimper. "Olivia, I'm right here. Everything's ok now." And then it stopped. The peaceful look returned to Olivia's face and she grew silent.

"Good morning, Ms. Cabot," the nurse whispered to her as she buzzed in to check Olivia's vitals. "How is she doing?"

"She was whimpering a minute ago, but she seems to be out for now," Alex replied, stroking Olivia's hair as she spoke.

"Some of that is to be expected. She'll wake up when she's good and ready to. I wouldn't worry just yet," the nurse explained to her. "Do you need anything? Something to drink, or is there anyone you would like us to call?" Alex started to shake her head, but changed her mind.

"Actually, could you call Rev. Marcus McMillan at the West Side Presbyterian Church? He's never met Olivia, but…" Alex began.

"Say no more. You need your own support system, too," the nurse said, smiling. She turned to leave the room, and Alex focused her attention back on Olivia. The room was still darkened and the steady hum of the instruments was having a hypnotizing effect on Alex, and before she knew it, she was back asleep.

XxXxX

Elliot was standing back in that dreaded hospital prison while CSU swept the scene. The bodies had all been hauled away by the team from the medical examiner's office, but the chalk outlines still remained. Elliot was seeing the blood spatter first-hand.

"How many?" he asked.

"76, altogether. 42 females and 34 males," Fin said stoicly. Elliot took a deep breath. The stench of death was still thick in the air. 76 people, who were dead simply because they chose to love someone who was the same gender. Olivia could have been one of them. _No,_ he thought. _Don't go there. Keep your head on, man._

"Elliot, you shouldn't be here. You're too close to all of this," Fin said, jarring him from his thoughts.

"I need to be here, Fin. I want to hunt down the animals that tried to destroy Olivia for simply being who she was," Elliot replied.

"We all do, man, but seriously, it's under control," Fin assured him.

XxXxX

A soft rap on Olivia's hospital room door stirred Alex from her slumber. Sunlight was pouring in the window.

"Alex, hi…" came the gentle voice of Rev. McMillan.

"Mark, thank you for coming. I just didn't know who else to call," Alex explained as she stretched. "What time is it?"

"Just after 10:00," he replied. "Is this a bad time? I can come back later, if you…"

"No, no, it's fine," she answered. "Let me see if I can find you a chair." Alex left the room and located a chair at the nurse's station. She brought it back in and Rev. McMillan took a seat as she folded the chair she had been sleeping on back into an upright position.

"How are you doing, Alex?" he began.

"I'm fine," she said, her face taking on a false look of calm.

"Are you really?" he asked.

"No," she answered. "I feel so helpless, you know?" He nodded. "I mean, I sat there for all of those days and nights waiting to hear anything, and now here she is. But, everything's not ok. I mean, she's back, but…" Alex was rambling now.

"But you're still afraid of losing her," Rev. McMillan finished. She sighed at his level of understanding.

"Yeah," she whispered. Rev. McMillan looked on as Alex observed the sleeping form in the bed next to her.

"Do you want to talk about what happened?" he asked.

"I…I don't even know what happened to her. The only thing I've heard from anyone is that she was shot during her escape. I don't know why she was kidnapped, or what they did to her, or anything. And I don't know how to help her." Tears were starting to fall from her eyes as she spoke.

"Alex, you are a child of God, and so is Olivia. Have faith. Turn all of the heartache and pain and fear you're feeling over to Him. You are not alone in this," the reverend said.

"I don't know how," she said, choking a sob back into her throat.

"Then let Him help you. He has been by your side from the very moment you were breathed into existence, and He has never left you. Nor has he ever left Olivia," the revered continued. "Here," he said, handing her a book. She took it and instantly recognized it as the Bible. "I thought perhaps you might find something in there to be useful. I've marked Isaiah, chapter 43 for you to read. It's all about being afraid, but never being alone."

"Thank you," she answered. "I don't know what to do if I lose her," she confessed.

"Alex, let's try not to think about that. She's still here, and she's breathing. If the time comes, we will address it. It's normal to have these fears and concerns, but try not to let them drag you down. Instead, focus on your love for Olivia, and your desire to help her heal. Think about the happy times ahead for you two." Alex smiled. She couldn't quite place why, but she felt a serene sense sweep over her, almost as if she was being held by an invisible being.

"I'm going to have to run, but you can call me anytime, day or night if you need to talk. And, before I go, I'd like to share a prayer with you, if you don't mind," he said.

"Of course," she answered, extending her hands towards him. He took them into his own, and together they bowed their heads.

"Oh Lord, these are certainly trying times for Alex and Olivia. We ask for you to remain with Alex and help her to find a sense of peace through Your undying, holy love for her. Help her to understand You as a Father, and that You will never leave her side no matter what happens. And we ask that You bestow Your healing touch on Olivia as her life hangs in balance. You have the power to…" He was interrupted by a blood curdling scream from the hospital bed. Alex immediately released his hands and ran to Olivia's side.

"No," she cried. "Please, no. Don't…" Terror filled her deep brown eyes. She was trying to pull herself out of the bed, but the medical instruments attached to her body combined with her weakened state made that nearly impossible. Rev. McMillan stepped toward her.

"Olivia, it's fine. You're in a hospital," he began. Her screams became louder and more agitated as he approached. Alex's eyes sought his.

"Shh, shh…it's ok, Liv, it's ok," Alex said, trying to soothe her. A nurse came running into the room.

"Ms. Benson, relax," she said, urging Olivia back onto the bed. "Your body can't handle too much movement. Please try to calm down." She turned her head. "I need both of you to step out of the room, please." Rev. McMillan silently took Alex's hand, leading the stunned blonde away from her lover's side. The two of them stood right outside the door.

"Alex?" he asked.

"My God, what the hell did they do to her?" Alex whispered.

"I don't know," he said. "Would you like me to stay?" She was trembling. Olivia was usually the strong, determined one. She was the one who went charging into dangerous situations without a second thought. Alex was the one who stayed behind until everything was deemed safe, but Olivia, Olivia was fearless. Until now.

"Alex?" he repeated.

"Yes, please. I can't do this alone," she said, as another tear slipped from her eye. The reverend pulled her into his arms, as he had done so many times when she was a child. She sobbed quietly into his shirt, her tiny frame wracked with sobs as he held onto her.

_**To get the latest news on all fics, videos, and publications, be sure to "like" my fan page on Facebook, listed under the name "Summer Jayne." You can also fine me on Twitter and YouTube under BensonFan711. Thanks for reading, and please review!**_


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**I had a little discussion regarding this story with a friend of mine recently, and we've come up with a crazy twist to this story like you wouldn't believe! I'm not anywhere close to revealing it yet, but it's coming, and now I feel like I have direction with this story again.**_

**Chapter 19**

"Ms. Benson, you have to calm down. No one in this hospital is going to hurt you," Nurse Julie Bower said to the struggling form on the hospital bed. Prior to working in the ICU, Julie had been assigned to the ER, where she put her sexual assault nursing certification to good use. After a number of years, though, it proved to be too emotionally draining for her, and she had moved up to the ICU. However, when she read Olivia's chart, she couldn't help but feel that she needed to keep a careful watch over the detective.

"Please, leave me alone!" Olivia cried. "Don't touch me!" More sobbing.

"I'll let go, Ms. Benson, but you need to stay in bed, and you need to try to calm down," Julie said. Olivia nodded. Julie released her hold on Olivia, who immediately curled herself up as best as she could and continued to cry. "I'm going to give you a very mild sedative. It won't knock you out, but it should help you calm down," Julie explained as she loaded a syringe and emptied the contents into Olivia's IV. Olivia felt a drugged, calming sensation wash over her. The pain in her body lessened, and she was quite content to lie in bed and rest.

"Alex…" she mumbled. She wasn't quite sure how to ask for the blonde's presence, but she figured if she could at least get a name out, that would do the trick.

"Relax. I'll get her for you," she replied. Julie stepped out into the hallway and made her way down to the waiting room where Alex and Rev. McMillan had relocated.

"Ms. Cabot?" she asked softly.

"Yes?" Alex said, looking up.

"She's asking for you," Julie said. Alex nodded and stood.

"Would you like me to go with you?" Rev. McMillan asked.

"Not just yet. I'd like to have a few minutes with her alone, first," Alex replied. Rev. McMillan nodded and settled back into his chair.

"I'll be right out here if there's anything I can do to help," he answered. Alex walked down the now familiar corridor and entered Olivia's room after giving a soft rap on the door.

"Alex…" the brunette mumbled again. "Where am I?" Alex froze. No one had told Olivia where she was?

"Sweetheart, you're at Mercy. You were shot, but you're going to be fine," Alex whispered to her.

"What about…where's Luke?" she asked.

"Honey, I don't understand. Who's Luke?" Alex replied. Olivia was thoroughly confused. Mercy? When in the hell had she gotten to Mercy? Or were they just trying to convince her that she was free to see what she would do? But then, why were they allowing Alex to be so close to her.

"Luke was…he's nobody," she said, closing her eyes. "You were praying…I heard you…"

"Yes, sweetie, I was. I've been praying ever since you disappeared," Alex explained. Olivia's eyes flew open. She glared at the blonde.

"Leave," was all she could bring herself to say.

"What?" Alex asked, completely stunned.

"Leave," she repeated. "I can't talk to you."

"Honey, I don't want to leave you alone," she said.

"Then call Elliot, but please, leave…" she said again. Alex gave Olivia a kiss on the forehead, noticing the slight flinch before she turned and left the room. She immediately pulled out her cell phone dialed the familiar number.

"Stabler," he answered gruffly.

"It's Alex," she said, unsure of what she should say next.

"What's wrong? Did Olivia take a turn for the worse?" he asked, giving the phone his full attention.

"No, no…nothing like that. It's just…she asked for you," Alex said, trying to hold back the hurt in her voice.

"I'll be right there," he replied. The line went dead. Alex had meandered her way back to the waiting room, and a puzzled Rev. McMillan was waiting for her.

"Alex? Is everything ok?" he asked. The blonde tore her eyes away from her cell phone screen to meet his.

"Yes…no…I don't know. Physically, she's fine," she said.

"But…" Rev. McMillan prodded her.

"She asked for Elliot. Why would she ask for him and not me?" she asked him, the pleading apparent in her eyes.

"Alex, come sit over here. How long have the two of you been together?" he asked. Alex perched herself in the chair next to him.

"Almost a year now. She's the one person I want to spend the rest of my life with, and I thought she felt the same way. We were discussing the possibility of starting a family before she disappeared," Alex explained. The reverend nodded.

"And, how long has she known Elliot?" he asked.

"They've been partners for over twelve years," she replied.

"My understanding is that police officers can become quite close to their partners. It must take an enormous amount of trust to walk into a potentially dangerous situation and know that no matter what happens, the other one will keep you safe. I would imagine that a relationship like lead to the deepest level of friendship, if nothing else," he reasoned with her. Alex remained silent, but her mind reflected on what she knew of Elliot and Olivia. Roughly a decade ago, when Alex has started working with SVU, Benson and Stabler were definitely the tightest pair of detectives in the unit. They could practically read each others' minds, even that long ago. And then there were the late night meals shared in diners after closing tough cases, calls from Olivia to Elliot's wife when something had gone wrong, and even the Sunday afternoons on someone's couch shouting obscenities at whatever sporting event they happened to be watching. They were close, Alex couldn't deny that.

"Maybe," Rev. McMillan continued, "what she needs is safety right now, instead of love. You're the one she loves, but he's the one who keeps her safe." Alex's mind continued to work as she processed the words.

"Maybe you're right," she said just as a harried looking Elliot came flying off the elevator and tore past them towards Olivia's room.

XxXxX

"Liv?" Elliot asked quietly, peering into her room. Olivia had closed her eyes briefly, but wasn't quite asleep.

"Elliot, hi," she said.

"What's going on?" he asked, pulling up a chair next to her.

"Nothing," she said.

"Alex said you wanted to talk to me about something, so here I am," he replied.

"She was praying, El," Olivia said, not volunteering anything else. Elliot searched her eyes and found the information he needed.

"Olivia, she's hurting. She's been hurting ever since you disappeared, and she turned to God for help," he explained.

"But you don't understand! There was a minister in here, and the words they were saying…" Tears were welling in her eyes again.

"Liv, shhh. It's ok. I know, I know," he said, soothing her as if she was one of his children.

"I can't take this. Where does this leave us? Where does this leave me? I don't want anyone praying for me or near me or around me. I just want everyone to leave it alone. I'm fine," she spat.

"I know you are, Liv," he said.

"Then why won't you all just leave me alone?" she asked.

"Liv, do you remember a few years ago when you thought your brother might be a rapist? You told me that you've been alone your whole life," he asked. She nodded. "You haven't been. Alex has had a crush on you from the moment she laid eyes on you. Munch and Fin would do just about anything for you, and Cragen always gets this stupid overprotective thing when there's an inkling that you might be a target. And me…well, I can't imagine having anyone else as a partner or friend. You _get_ me, like no one else does."

"Elliot Stabler, if you are about to profess your undying love for me, stop right there. We've had that discussion," she said.

"I know, and no, I wasn't about to 'profess my undying love to you,' as you so bluntly put it," he said. He paused. "Although, actually, maybe it is, in a way. You're my best friend, Liv. And I really don't even want to thing about how difficult it would be to break in a new partner _and_ a best friend." She smiled again. "Seriously though, you rest. I'll go talk to Alex. Explain some things to her that she doesn't know about. It'll be ok, Liv, I promise." Olivia settled back into the pillows and closed her eyes once more. As much as she loved and adored Alex, she felt safe with Elliot, and she probably always would.

"Hey," he said, just before he left. She opened her eyes. "I still have two tickets to the Knicks in two weeks, and you'd better be there. Kathy hates sports, and if I ask Munch or Fin, the other one will get jealous." He winked as he finished the sentence.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world," she replied.

_**Thanks for reading, and please remember to review! Also, if you are interested in owning your very own copy of Lioness, it is available for purchase WORLDWIDE. You can find it at www. createspace .com/3587527 (no spaces)**_


	20. Chapter 20

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**For all of my readers out there who are pissed that Olivia's dumping on Alex, please keep reading. There's more that's going on with her and in her head. There's a reason for all of this, I promise! Have I ever led you astray before?**_

_**And NO…let me repeat NO this is NOT going to turn into an EO fic, but that friendship and commraderie that they two of them have cannot be ignored. Besides, Elliot was the one who was there with Liv through a good chunk of what happened, so naturally, he's the one she'd seek out first.**_

**Chapter 20**

"Is she ok?" Alex asked as Elliot entered the waiting room.

"She's sleeping right now," he replied. He paused, not sure how to continue. "Do you have any idea why she flipped out like that?"

"No, why? Did she tell you?" Alex asked.

"She didn't have to. She told me what happened when she woke up, and I put the rest together. She heard you praying over her," he explained.

"I still don't underst…" _They're religious zealots, Alex._ Fin's words rattled around in her brain, and finally, she began to understand.

"They were pretty rough on her, Alex. What she's been through…" Elliot shook his head, unsure of how to finish the sentence. "I thought I had seen everything over the years, but this was simply cruel."

"What did they do to her? I know they burned her feet, but what else?" Alex asked quietly. Elliot took a deep breath. "Please, Elliot, I need to know."

"Ok. While she was there, a trainer – that's what they call them – was assigned to her. His job was to…teach her that sex with a man can be more pleasurable than sex with a woman," Elliot began.

"But it doesn't work that way," Alex replied.

"I know, I know," he said quickly, "but that was what he was assigned to do. He started by forcing her to watch heterosexual porn while he brought her to orgasm using a vibrator. Then it progressed to rape," he said.

"Oh, God…" Alex whispered.

"Not just once, Alex. Daily. Sometimes multiple times a day," Elliot let the words sink in. "Eventually she stopped fighting. When that happened, he began a procedure that was supposed to desensitize her to women." Alex was sitting ramrod straight in her chair, unable to move. She didn't want to hear Elliot's story, but at the same time, she desperately wanted to know what Olivia had been through in order to support her as best as she could. Elliot reached over and grabbed her hand.

"How?" she managed to squeak out, knowing she was going to hate the answer already.

"She was forced to watch lesbian porn. When her body responded, of its own volition, a device sent painful shocks to her genital region. The idea was that she would begin to associate women with pain rather than pleasure," he replied in the same stoic tone he used whenever he had to deliver unpleasant news to an unsuspecting citizen.

"I guess it worked," Alex said softly. "She doesn't even want to see me."

"Alex, listen to me," Elliot said, turning her now downcast eyes toward him. "She started cooperating with them because they convinced her that you were also being captive. She allowed them to hurt her repeatedly because she believed she was saving you from being tortured. She loves you with every ounce of her being; never question that. But when she heard you praying, she was right back in that hospital, waiting to be tortured all over again."

Rev. McMillan had been listening to the entire, horrific tale. He, too, felt the same stab of guilt in causing this poor woman to relive the tragic events that she had just been through.

"I don't know how to help her," Alex whispered.

"Be there for her. Listen to her. Respect her boundaries. You've worked with rape victims before. You'll know what to do," Elliot said. "Now, I have to get back to tracking down the bastards that did this in the first place. Call me if you need me, ok?" Alex nodded.

"Elliot?" she called.

"Yeah?" he asked, turning towards her.

"When you find him, give him a swift kick in the balls for me," she said. Elliot grinned.

"You got it," he said.

XxXxX

Alex curled up in the chair and opened the Bible Rev. McMillan had given her. She glanced at Olivia's sleeping form in the hospital bed in front of her. Some of the machines had been removed as she got stronger and her body was able to manage certain tasks on its own. Her color was better, and it absolutely amazed Alex what a difference 36 hours could make. As an afterthought, Alex pulled the dust jacket from the hardback book in her bag and slipped it over the Bible. She wasn't trying to hide anything from Olivia, but she didn't want to scare the living daylights out of her either.

She read the passages that were marked, starting with Isaiah 43. It sang to her about not being afraid because God was always with you no matter what. She found the words comforting.

"Alex?" Olivia whispered. Her eyes were still closed, but Olivia had always been one to start mumbling just before she woke. Alex closed the book and set it on the floor next to her.

"I'm right here, Liv," she said, holding one of Olivia's hands between her two.

"It's really you…" she said as her brown eyes focused on the blonde face in front of her.

"Yeah, honey, it's me," Alex whispered back. Olivia took the hand not encased by Alex's and brought it up to stroke the pale skin on her face.

"I'm sorry…" she began.

"No, honey, I'm sorry. I didn't know. I wish I had…I never would have done anything that might upset you," Alex said.

"You couldn't have known, Alex, but I was so unfair to you," Olivia replied.

"Olivia, stop it. There's no reason for us to blame each other. You're here, and you're safe, and that's all that matters," Alex said. Olivia's hand reached back farther and pulled the blonde's head towards hers. She paused for a second, their lips millimeters apart. Then she closed the distance crashing her lips onto Alex's. The love and strength from deep within the brunette's core channeled through her body to her lips on onward to Alex. Their tongues danced for a moment before Olivia lowered her head back onto the pillow.

"I love you, Alexandra Cabot," she whispered.

XxXxX

As the days passed, Olivia grew stronger. She stood in her hospital room dressed in jeans and a comfortable blue top while Alex gathered the remainder of her personal things that had found their way into her room during her stay.

"Ready to go home?" the blonde asked.

"More than ready," Olivia replied.

"Then let's go," Alex said, directing Olivia into the wheelchair that was customary hospital protocol. When they reached the hospital garage, Olivia slid into the front seat of the car while Alex stowed the bag in the back and climbed in the driver's seat. She pulled the car onto the city streets and headed towards the familiar building.

"What are we doing here?" Olivia asked, glancing up. She had assumed they were going back to Alex's apartment, since that's where they had spent the majority of their time together so far, but instead, she found herself in front of her own apartment building.

"I hope you don't mind, but I haven't been able to bring myself to go back to my apartment since…that night," she said, almost apologetically. Olivia sighed in relief.

"Not at all. In fact, I wasn't really looking forward to going back there, either. As long as you're with me, though, I don't really care where we stay," Olivia replied. The two women walked the familiar path to Olivia's front door, where the brunette automatically reached into her pocket.

"Don't worry, I have the key," Alex said, extracting Olivia's keys from her purse. She undid the lock and the two of them stepped over the threshold. Olivia took a moment to look around the neglected apartment. Dust had settled on most of the furniture, and it looked like it hadn't been used. And yet, it still had a level of familiarity that Olivia felt almost tangibly. It was like being wrapped in the arms of an old friend.

"How do you feel, honey?" Alex asked, touching Olivia lightly on the shoulder.

"Like I'd do just about anything for a hot shower and clean pajamas," she answered honestly. Alex chuckled.

"Then why don't you steer yourself towards the bathroom, make yourself comfortable, and I'll whip us up something to eat," Alex suggested. Olivia gave her a quick peck on the cheek and escaped into her bathroom.

She turned the water on and adjusted the taps until the temperature suited her. She stripped her clothes and stepped under the spray, allowing the water to cascade over the front of her body before turning and tipping her head back to wet her hair. She closed her eyes and wondered what to do next. She had expected to die in that prison. Thoughts of counseling and digging up painful memories consumed her as she methodically scrubbed her body. She knew it was completely psychological, but she could still sense Luke's lingering smell on her. When she was satisfied that she was as clean as she was going to get, she turned the water off, stepped out of the shower and slipped into a set of comfortable cotton pajamas.

Stepping out into the living room, she noticed a set of white take out boxes on the dining room table as Alex bustled around, clad in her own pajamas, fishing for silverware and plates.

"You had absolutely no food, so I ordered Chinese," she explained. Olivia smiled, suddenly craving the greasy food.

"It's perfect," Olivia replied, moving towards the kitchen to help Alex.

"No, no…sit. I have just about everything," Alex said. Olivia sat at the table and Alex joined her after grabbing a glass of water for herself and a diet soda for Olivia. The two women ate in awkward silence until Alex spoke.

"So, how are you doing, really?" she asked.

"I'm fine," Olivia answered.

"Olivia, you could have your leg ripped off by a lion, and you'd say 'I'm fine.' Level with me. What's really going on in your mind?" she asked.

"I don't know, Alex. So much happened, and to be completely honest, I'm still trying to process it all. For the first few days in the hospital, I wasn't even really sure I was actually at Mercy," Olivia explained.

"But, that doesn't makes sense. I mean, where else would you find doctors and nurses and a bunch of sick people?" Alex asked.

"I was in an old hospital. The walls looked the same, everything was just so similar. I can't explain it. And the entire time I was there, they kept throwing me off balance. I'm not even sure I could have told you my own name by the time Elliot and I escaped," Olivia said. "I really am sorry I snapped at you."

"Oh, Liv, it's fine. I know why you did it, and really, it's fine. Elliot explained some of what happened to me while you were in the hospital," Alex replied.

"Did he tell you I was raped?" Olivia asked.

"Yeah," was all she could manage to say.

"Ok, Cabot, out with it," Olivia said. Alex stared at her incredulously.

"Out with what?" she asked.

"You know, how could a hot shot sex crimes detective allow herself to be the victim of rape, or whatever else you want to say. Or yell at me for cheating on you, or whatever you need to get off your chest," Olivia said, throwing herself back into her chair. Alex reached out a hand and held it under Olivia's chin, turning the brunette's face towards her own.

"None of this is your fault, understand? None of it. I'm not angry at you for anything, and most of all, I don't think you cheated on me. You were forced to do those things." Olivia opened her mouth to protest, but closed it instantly at Alex's raised eyebrows. "There isn't a doubt in my mind that you would ever be unfaithful to me." Some sort of comprehension flashed through Olivia's eyes. Feeling overwhelmed by emotion and in desperate need of a distraction, Olivia stood and began to clear the table. When all of the dishes had been cleared, and the leftovers put away, she realized she was exhausted. Her stifled yawns hadn't gone unnoticed by Alex.

"Your body is still healing. Why don't you go get some sleep," Alex suggested.

"That's probably a good idea," Olivia replied. Alex followed her into the bedroom. Olivia climbed into her old, familiar bed and noticed that Alex was extracting blankets from the closet.

"Alex? What are you doing?" she asked.

"I…I wasn't sure if you wanted to be alone or not, so I just assumed I'd be sleeping on the couch," the blonde explained.

"Will you sleep with me?" Olivia asked. Alex studied the brunette as she considered her request. "Just sleep, Alex. I don't know if I'm quite ready for anything else yet." Alex returned to the closet, stowed the blankets, and returned to the bedroom. She slipped into the bed next to Olivia and felt the brunette curl an arm around her waist. Alex snuggled into the ward body next to her, and for the first time since the night of the break-in, both women closed their eyes with smiles on their faces.

"Alex?" Olivia whispered.

"Mmm?" Alex mumbled back.

"Why were we targeted?" Olivia asked. Alex sat up.

"That's the question Cragen and everyone else have been trying to answer. No one knows," she answered. "But let's not think about that tonight," Alex said, settling into Olivia once more. Olivia still felt uneasy. Somehow, she felt it was more than the fact that they were a lesbian couple. She had a sinking suspicion that there was a personal element to all of this as well.

_**Hmm…personal, could it be? Guess we'll just have to wait and see!**_

_**Thanks for reading, and please remember to review! Once again, if you are interested in owning your very own copy of the new and improved Lioness, it is available for purchase WORLDWIDE. You can find it at www. createspace .com/3587527 (no spaces)**_


	21. Chapter 21

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**I love all of your predictions…and yes, I consider what you all have to say. Sometimes, they're just what I need to get over a case of writer's block. Popular theory is that Rev. McMillan is a bad guy. Is he? Guess you'll have to keep reading to find out!**_

**Chapter 21**

Alex woke to the sound of her phone vibrating on the nightstand next to the bed. She reached for it, and Olivia's arm, still locked around her waist, pulled her back.

"Let it ring…" the brunette mumbled, eyes still closed. Alex flicked open the phone, looking back at Olivia.

"Hello?" she said in a loud whisper.

"Alex, hi! It's Joan. Did I wake you?" Alex rolled over and glanced at the clock. It was well past 10:00 in the morning.

"No, it's fine, Joan," she said, unlocking Olivia's arm from around her waist and crawling out of bed. Olivia mumbled something incoherent, and Alex immediately shoved her pillow back into the brunette's arms in an almost automatic response. Halfway across the room, she realized what she had done, and how much more meaning the gesture had now. Olivia was sound asleep again with her arms curled around the blonde's pillow.

"I'm so relieved Olivia was found. I was calling because, well, I'm sure things are awkward right now, and you're busy taking care of Olivia. I thought you two might enjoy a home cooked meal from me," Joan said. Alex's mouth watered at the very thought of Joan's cooking. Her meals were practically legendary at the church.

"That sounds…wait, how did you know Olivia was found?" Alex asked, puzzled. As far as she knew, the only person who knew of Olivia's rescue outside of the police was Rev. McMillan.

"It's all over the news!" Joan exclaimed. Alex immediately fished for the remote and flicked on the TV.

"…one survivor in this massacre just outside of the city, Detective Olivia Benson, who was reported missing almost a month ago. Detective Benson was released from Mercy General last night and is expected to make a full recovery. Back to you, Mark," the reporter on the screen said. Alex's jaw dropped. This just made life more difficult. Now that the press knew about Olivia, they would be hounding the two women non-stop for interviews.

"Alex?" Joan asked, after she had been silent for some time.

"I'm here, Joan. Dinner would be wonderful. I don't feel much like cooking, and God knows Olivia won't feel like doing anything," she replied.

"Wonderful! I'll be by around 6:00," Joan said. Alex gave her Olivia's address and the two women bid farewell. Alex padded back into the bedroom, still tired. She carefully extracted her pillow from the brunette's clutches and slipped back under the covers. Olivia mumbled something incoherent and grinned as she pulled the blonde back to her.

XxXxX

Olivia blinked a few times, shrugging the sleep from her body. She looked around the room and at the blonde sleeping next to her. For a brief moment, she was afraid that she was still dreaming. She reached next to her and stroked the blonde's hair, and the sensation registered in her fingertips and traveled up to her brain, fully convincing her that she wasn't dreaming. She gently kissed Alex's temple and scurried into the bathroom.

Alex heard the water running as she stirred from her slumber. The covers on Olivia's side of the bed were tossed aside, but the sheets were still warm. Alex padded her way out to the kitchen to put on a pot of coffee before returning to the bedroom to make the bed. Olivia emerged from the bathroom minutes later with a terrycloth robe wrapped around her body and a towel perched on top of her head.

"Morning, beautiful," Olivia said.

"Afternoon," Alex said, letting a half smile play across her face. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm ok," Olivia replied. A look of concern washed over Alex's face. Olivia sat on the bed next to Alex, lacing her fingers into those of Alex. "Really, I'm fine. You can stop looking at me like I'm going to break."

"But…" Alex began.

"Shh…" Olivia replied, holding her index finger to Alex's lips. "I just want to put all of this behind me and put things back to the way they were."

"Olivia, that might be harder than you think," Alex said.

"No, Alex, don't start. I don't want to hear about how I need counseling, and how it takes time, and all of the other speeches I give victims on a daily basis. I know just as much about being a victim as you do, if not more. So please, Alex, don't do this," Olivia said, almost begging.

"I know you know all of that, which is why I wasn't going to say anything. Liv, honey, I don't know how, but this is all over the news," Alex informed her. Shock played across Olivia's face.

"What?" she asked in a hushed whisper. "How?"

"Who knows, but the point is that the story is out there, and your name was specifically mentioned. Look, maybe we…" Alex was cut off by her phone again.

"Cabot," she said, grabbing the device.

"Alex, it's Elliot. Have you seen the news?" he asked.

"Yeah, I saw it," she answered.

"Has Liv?" He asked.

"I just told her about it," Alex said.

"And?" he asked.

"She's not happy about it, and quite frankly, neither am I. I want to know who leaked this to the media, and I want that person's head on a silver platter," Alex said. Her voice had taken the same take-no-prisoners tone she used when she dealt with the scum of the earth. Olivia couldn't help but grin at the blonde's protectiveness of her. She quietly slipped off the bed and slipped into the closet to change into a pair of her favorite jeans and a comfortable cotton top. She thoroughly enjoyed the feeling of having her legs encased in fabric after being forced to wear skirts for so long. When she returned to the bedroom, Alex's phone had been tossed into the center of the bed, and the blonde was now in the shower. Olivia walked out into the kitchen and poured a steaming cup of coffee as she waited for Alex to emerge.

Coffee was one of the many things Olivia had missed while she was held prisoner. She inhaled the familiar aroma and allowed the sweetened liquid to linger on her tongue for just a second longer than normal. She was convinced that she would never be able to keep up with the demands of her job without the liquid currently in her mug. Alex joined Olivia as soon as she was dressed. The two women had done this very thing every morning for nearly a year, and yet, somehow this morning felt awkward.

"Anything special on your agenda today?" Olivia asked, breaking the silence.

"Not really. An old friend called this morning. Apparently, she saw the news coverage, and she want to bring us dinner tonight," Alex said, trying to sound casual about the whole thing.

"Oh, is this someone I know?" Olivia asked.

"Um…no, actually. But she's someone I knew when I was growing up. She was sort of like a second mother to me when I was a teenager, and my mother and I didn't get along very well," Alex answered. _Please, Olivia, don't push this. Don't be the detective today._

"So how did you meet her?" Olivia pressed. Alex considered the question carefully.

"She's just a friend of the family," Alex answered. Alex didn't want to tell Olivia that she knew Joan from church. She was worried that Olivia would panic. And yet, Olivia knew there was something Alex was hiding from her.

"Alex, where do you know her from? And stop dodging the question," Olivia said, setting her jaw.

"She went to church with my parents," Alex said, her voice barely audible. She braced herself for the fury Olivia was about to unleash. Olivia sat back in her chair and contemplated her next move. There was no way she wanted a church-going woman in her home to judge her and her life, but arguing with Alex wasn't the way to handle this. In the end, it would only cause more problems between the two of them.

"I have an idea," Olivia said, walking around the table and sitting in the chair next to Alex. The blonde's blue eyes fixed on the brunette as she moved. "Why don't you call Joan back and tell her that we need some alone time," she said, leaning in towards the blonde. Alex swallowed hard. Olivia's lips came crashing down on hers and her tongue urged the blonde's lips apart. Alex returned the kiss and a slight moan slipped across her lips.

"I promise I'll make it worth your while," Olivia said as she paused for air. One hand tangled in Alex's hair as the other lodged itself on the blonde's hip. She leaned in and found the spot behind Alex's ear that she knew would make the blonde putty in her hands. She licked and nibbled, eliciting sweet moans from Alex.

"Liv…Olivia…stop," she said. If Olivia stopped now, Alex would win.

"Please, baby, do it for me," Olivia murmured, returning to her previous actions.

"Liv, baby, as much as I want you, we can't do this…not just…ohhhh…" _Gotcha,_ Olivia thought. Olivia gracefully maneuvered the two of them so that she could lift Alex. She deposited the blonde on the bed and hovered over her, reaching for the phone. She held it up to Alex.

"Call her," Olivia said. She pushed a hand under the hem of the blonde's shirt and traced circled on her flat tummy, sending shivers through Alex's body. Alex's brain was mush. She had missed the attention of the brunette, and Olivia always knew just which buttons to push to get her way.

"I can't, Liv…I already told her…oh, God…" she moaned as Olivia's hand reached upwards to brush against her already hardened nipple.

"Yes, you can, and when you do, I'll give you want you so obviously need." The huskiness in Olivia's voice wasn't helping the situation. "Make the call," Olivia whispered in Alex's ear as she covered the blonde's body with her own. Alex's head was reeling. Somewhere, deep in the recesses of her mind, she knew that Olivia was manipulating her. The question was, though, was she going to allow herself to be manipulated by the woman she loved more than anything in the world?

_**Hmm…still don't know much more about what happened to Olivia or why, but what's up with her? Please comment, review, predict…whatever floats your boat.**_

_**And once again, if you would like your very own copy of Lioness, you can find it at www. createspace. com/**_ _**3587527 (no spaces). For all of the latest updates, please "Like" my fan page on Facebook. You can find it under "Summer Jayne."**_


	22. Chapter 22

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

**_Oh, forget it…more story!_**

**Chapter 22**

"Liv…Olivia…seriously, I can't call her," Alex said, finding the strength in her arms to hold Olivia's roaming hands still. She was still breathing hard, but she was determined not to let the brunette use sex to manipulate her. Olivia's brown eyes flashed briefly with anger, but it was long enough for Alex to feel a surge of fear.

Olivia pushed herself off of Alex, slightly shoving the blonde further into the mattress in the process.

"Fine," Olivia said, storming back out into the living room.

"Olivia, come on, don't do this," Alex said, running after the brunette.

"Don't do what, Alex? Huh?" Olivia replied, whirling around to face the blonde. "Get upset over this? Well, let me explain something to you. I just spent God knows how long in a prison, run by religious zealots who raped and tortured everyone in there because we were all gay. And then, _then_ I come home to find my girlfriend, who has never been to church in the ten years I have known her, is suddenly buddy buddy with a bunch of Bible thumpers. So, I'm sorry if you think I'm being unreasonable because I don't want one of your new-found religious freaks in my home, and last time I checked, it was _my_ name on this lease." Alex simply stared back at her with her jaw on the ground. She rarely saw Olivia rant like this, and even though Olivia worked with abuse victims every day, there was still a tiny piece of Alex that was afraid that Olivia just might hit her.

"Are you asking me to leave?" Alex asked quietly. Olivia's head was still going a mile a minute. The two women stared at each other, the weight of Alex's words sinking in for both of them. Olivia sighed and broke the silence.

"No, I'm not. I just…I can't figure out…I feel like you don't understand that all of this religion crap scares the hell out of me," Olivia replied.

"Olivia, sit down," Alex said, sinking onto the couch. Olivia took a seat next to her.

"I know you went through hell, and I can't even begin to imagine what you must have gone through. But, from the moment I turned around on the street that night, and you were no where to be found, until I knew you were going to be ok, I was so scared I could barely breathe. My apartment was labeled a crime scene, I was in hiding in a hotel, and the woman I loved more than life itself was gone. I didn't know how to handle it. In fact, there were times I thought the emotional pain alone would kill me," Alex confessed.

"I used to be enough for you, Alex," Olivia said, eyes fixed on the ground. "What happened?" Alex lifted the brunette's chin so that their eyes could meet.

"Olivia, listen to me. You _are _enough. You are all I've ever wanted and more than I ever could have hoped for," Alex replied.

"Then, why?" Olivia asked, her voice cracking, betraying her.

"Oh, honey, I didn't realize this was bothering you quite this much. But Olivia, you have to know that I would never invite anyone here unless I was absolutely certain I could trust them. And I do trust Joan," Alex replied. Olivia was silent. "It's just dinner. How about this...if it gets to be too much, just mention that you're tired, and I'll ask her to leave."

"Just like that?" Olivia asked.

"Just like that," Alex promised.

XxXxX

Olivia was so nervous she visibly jumped when the buzzer sounded at 5:50 that evening.

"Alex, I don't think I can do this," Olivia said as Alex walked over to buzz Joan in.

"Yes you can. Remember what we talked about earlier today. Oh, for God's sake, will you put the gun back in the bedroom where it belongs?" she said, slightly exasperated. Before Olivia was truly ready, Alex was opening the front door, and a pleasant looking gray haired woman was stepping over the threshold carrying several plastic containers.

"Hi, Alex," the woman said, making her way into the kitchen. Alex followed to help her.

"No, no, no, hon, you sit," Joan said, redirecting Alex to one of the bar stools. Joan bustled around in the kitchen, warming the food that she had brought. Olivia figured she should at least make the effort to be social, so she slid herself on the stool next to Alex.

"Ok, dinner will be ready in about 15 minutes. You must be Olivia," Joan said, extending her hand. Olivia shook it gingerly.

"And you must be the Joan I've heard Alex talking about so much," she replied.

"I'm so glad everything is working out for the two of you," Joan said. Alex and Olivia exchanged glances. Fear was still etched in Olivia's deep brown eyes, but there was a shadow of trust in them as well. Alex's blue eyes held only love. She understood how difficult this was for Olivia, but she also hoped that Olivia would soon realize that there were beautiful people in the world with a strong sense of faith.

"We are, too, Joan," Alex replied. "So, what have you been up to lately?"

"Oh, not too much. I'm planning a trip to Ohio to visit my daughter soon, but other than that, things have been pretty quiet," the older woman replied.

"You're going to see Missy?" Alex asked, her eyes lighting up.

"Liv, Missy and I were practically best friends when we were kids, but I haven't seen her since…" Alex trailed off, trying to remember.

"Since you both went off to college," Joan finished.

"How is she?" Alex asked.

"She's wonderful! She's settled down now with two beautiful children, 8 and 5," Joan replied.

"She's _married?_" Alex asked, barely believing that her free-spirited friend had settled down with a family.

"In a manner of speaking. Her wife's name is Jen," Joan answered. Olivia froze. This woman's daughter was a lesbian? Maybe Olivia had been far too quick to judge. Her thought process was interrupted by the alarm on the oven sounding. Joan jumped over and pulled out the food – an amazing ensemble of chicken, potatoes and vegetables. Olivia had never tasted anything quite so exquisitely prepared in her life. Joan plated two servings and set the food in front of the two women. She deposited all of the used pans in the dishwasher, wrapped up the remaining food, and stowed it in Olivia's fridge.

"Well, now that you two are settled, I really need to leave. Alex, you know how to reach me. Feel free to call anytime. That goes for you, too, Olivia," Joan said, showing herself to the front door. And as quickly as she had breezed in, she disappeared, leaving a very stunned Olivia in her wake.

"See? That wasn't so bad, was it?" Alex said, turning back towards Olivia.

"Her daughter is really a lesbian?" Olivia asked.

"Yeah, I guess she is," Alex replied.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Olivia asked.

"I didn't know. The last time I saw Missy, she was still a huge tomboy, not interested in anyone – male or female. Although, looking back, I can kind of see it, and I'm not really that surprised that it turned out that way," Alex replied. "What is it, Liv?" she asked, seeing a puzzled look on Olivia's face.

"It's so easy to just hate all of them, you know?" Olivia replied.

"Hate all of…who?" Alex answered.

"You know, religious types, Christians," Olivia answered.

"But now you aren't so sure…" Alex filled in.

"I don't know what to think anymore, Alex," Olivia said, looking down at her now empty plate. Alex reached an arm around Olivia and pulled her close.

"Olivia, I promised you I would never let anyone near you that I didn't trust. Someday, I hope you'll truly believe me again," Alex replied, hugging the brunette close to her.

"Alex, I have to find out who did this," Olivia said, pulling away from the blonde. Originally, she thought it might have something to do with Alex's newfound Christian friends, but now she wasn't so sure. Joan may be at the bottom of her suspect list, but there were still plenty of people still left on it.

"Find out what, honey?" Alex asked.

"I need to find out how we were targeted and who did it. Whoever they were knew a lot of detailed information about us, more than a random stranger would know," Olivia answered.

"I think we should start with a visit to Dr. Huang before you start investigating your own rape," Alex said, her tone taking a firm edge to it.

"I know, and I will, but Lex, I _need_ to do this, and I need you to understand that," Olivia said.

"I know, and I do understand. You're the detective; you need to investigate, but Liv, you also need help. Please call George," Alex said, practically begging.

"I will, hon, I promise," Olivia replied. With that, she jumped up and started clearing the dishes. Olivia had trusted Alex with respect to Joan; it was only fair that Alex trust Olivia to call George.

**_Well now, that was interesting. Olivia's in for quite the journey!_**

**_And once again, if you would like your very own copy of Lioness, you can find it at www. createspace. com/_** **_3587527 (no spaces). For all of the latest updates, please "Like" my fan page on Facebook. You can find it under "Summer Jayne."_**


	23. Chapter 23

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

**_Two chapters in one day! Like I said on Twitter…days off = more time to write._**

**Chapter 23**

Alex woke in the middle of the night and saw the covers on Olivia's side of the bed thrown back. Glancing up, she noticed the sliver of light coming from underneath the bedroom door. Confused, she dragged herself out of bed and made her way into the living room. She saw Olivia bent over the dining room table, papers strewn everywhere, pen in hand.

"Liv, what are you doing?" she asked sleepily.

"I have to figure this out, Alex," Olivia answered, pulling another sheet of paper toward her.

"Liv, it's 2:00 in the morning. Come to bed, honey," Alex said.

"Oh no, I can't stop thinking long enough to sleep," she replied. Finally, she looked up at at Alex. "Who knows about us?"

"What?" Alex replied, yawning, falling into the chair opposite Olivia.

"Come on, think. We're not exactly the most public couple in the world. Who knows we're together?" Olivia asked. She had that look about her. Alex recognized it. She was so focused on this that she wouldn't, or couldn't, rest until she at least made progress.

"Cragen, Fin, Munch, Elliot…" Alex began.

"I know all of our co-workers know. Who else did you tell?" Olivia pressed.

"I don't know, Liv. Come on, I just want to go back to sleep," she whined.

"Help me finish this list, and you can go back to bed," Olivia replied.

"Will you come with me?" Alex asked, yawning again. Olivia rolled her eyes.

"Come on, Alex, who else knows about us?" she pressed again.

"Ok, um…my family, church members…I'm pretty sure Donnelly's figured it out, maybe Petrovsky…I think that's about it," Alex replied. Olivia was scribbling vigorously as Alex spoke.

"Ok, then," Olivia said, looking up at her. "Whoever is responsible is on one of these lists."

"Why are you so sure this was someone we know? Isn't it possible that a stranger observed us and put two and two together?" Alex answered.

"Because, the things these people knew…they knew I was a cop," Olivia began.

"Anyone could have figure that one out," Alex replied.

"They knew my mother was an English professor," Olivia countered. Alex's head snapped up. "And they knew that she was raped." The words filtered through Alex's brain. Olivia was right. Then again, Olivia was usually right about stuff like this. Someone had to have given her captors information.

"Ok, let's suppose you're right. Why would anyone do this?" Alex asked, leaning forward across the table.

"That's my next question," Olivia replied. Alex hung her head.

"Can we please work on that one in the morning? I'm exhausted," Alex whined.

"Feel free to go back to bed anytime, hon," Olivia replied, turning her head back towards the papers in front of her.

"I know, but I feel so much better with you next to me," Alex said, walking around to Olivia and wrapping the brunette's shoulders in her arms. She nuzzled Olivia's hair. "Please come to bed, sweetie."

"Ok, you win," Olivia said, turning her face to kiss Alex's cheek. Alex took Olivia's hand and led the brunette back into the bedroom. She curled herself into the body next to her and drifted off to sleep, peaceful and content that she was no longer sleeping alone.

_Olivia was running down the halls. Fear pounded through her with every step. She glanced over her shoulder to see who was following her. No one was there. Still, she knew she had to run._

_She wasn't sure which way to turn in the labyrinth she was in. Gradually, the walls melted into faces. Face of those she knew well._

_"Demon child…demon child…demon child…" they chanted, taunting her. Why were they doing this to her? Didn't they know someone was trying to kill her? Didn't they know that…_

Olivia sat up with a start. Sweat rolled off of her forehead and her breathing was ragged.

"Liv, honey, it's ok. You're safe now," Alex said, sitting up and stroking Olivia's arm.

"What happened?" she asked, still breathless.

"You were having a nightmare," Alex explained calmly. Olivia threw the covers off of her and marched into the bathroom. She twisted the knob on the faucet and let the cold water run over a clean washcloth. She held the cloth over her face. A wave of emotion swept over her body, and the careful barriers she had built up over her forty plus years of lifetime crumbled and she found herself quietly sobbing into the cloth. Alex had silently followed Olivia in to the bathroom, and when she saw the detectives shoulders shaking, she reached out and gathered the brunette into her arms. She had been expecting this, but seeing it up close and personal sent a dagger through her heart. Olivia dropped the cloth and turned in the blonde's embrace, burying her face into the mane of blonde hair.

"I can't do this, Alex," she said.

"Shhh…it's ok," Alex whispered, stroking Olivia soft brown hair. "It's going to be ok. You're safe, now." Olivia continued to sob.

"Why, Alex?" Olivia said through the tears.

"I don't know, honey, but we'll find out. Somehow, we'll find out," Alex said. Olivia lifted her head. Her once happy eyes had taken on a haunted look, and now they were blotched with red. "C'mon, sweetie, let's go back to bed." Alex led Olivia back into the bedroom and gently tucked her in before climbing into the other side of the bed. The moment she settled, Olivia curled herself into Alex's chest.

"What do you need, hon?" Alex whispered.

"Just hold me," Olivia murmured. Alex responded by wrapping her arms tighter around the brunette. They stayed like that until Olivia's body slackened and faint snoring came from her. Once Alex was convinced that she was once again asleep, she closed her own eyes and fell into her own dream world.

XxXxX

Olivia groaned as her home phone sprang to life. She reached over onto the nightstand and snatched the offending object from the cradle.

"Hello?" she answered.

"Olivia Benson, please," came a female voice from the other end of the line.

"Speaking," Olivia responded.

"Olivia, my name is Lauren Murphy, and I'm calling on behalf of the news program _True Crime._ Your story caught our attention, and we'd love to do a piece on you," the voice answered.

"Uh, I'm not giving any interviews at this time," Olivia replied.

"Well, if you could keep us in mind…" Olivia pressed the button on the phone to end the call, abruptly cutting off Lauren Murphy. She sank back into bed and closed her eyes again, feeling Alex's arms instinctively wrap around her once again.

An hour later, the phone jolted again.

"What now?" Olivia mumbled, reaching for it again. "Hello?"

"I'd like to speak with Detective Benson," a male voice said.

"Who's calling please?" Olivia answered.

"This is Rick Barnett from _Weekly News._ I'd like to speak with her about an interview," he replied.

"No comment," Olivia answered, hanging up the phone. She reached behind the cradle and jerked the cord out from the base, effectively silencing the offending object.

"What's going on?" Alex mumbled, rubbing her eyes.

"That's the second call I've gotten this morning from a reporter," Olivia answered, slightly annoyed. This time her cell phone was vibrating.

"Look, if you vultures don't stop calling, I'll…" she began.

"Olivia, it's Don Cragen," the caller interrupted.

"Captain, I'm sorry…I thought you were someone else," Olivia answered.

"Listen, Liv, on the off chance you were planning to come to work today, which there's absolutely no need for you to do yet, I wanted to warn you," Cragen responded.

"What's going on? Do you need me?" she asked, snapping awake. Alex took the opportunity to slide out of bed and make her way to the kitchen. There was no point in trying to sleep anymore, so she figured now was as good a time as any to start the coffee.

"No, no…in fact, you're still on the DL. But there's a gaggle of reporters here looking for you," he informed her. Olivia rolled her eyes. They just weren't going to let this go. "We can issue a statement on your behalf. How much do you want to let out?"

"None of it. What I went through…it's private, and I'd like to keep it that way," Olivia answered.

"Ok, we'll take care of it. You focus on getting yourself back together," Cragen responded.

"Thank you, Captain," Olivia answered before hanging up the phone. She threw the covers back and joined Alex in the kitchen. Alex silently slid a mug across the counter towards Olivia.

"Thank you," Olivia said, closing her eyes and bringing the mug towards her to inhale the aroma.

"Everything ok at the precinct? Cragen doesn't honestly expect you to come back to work yet, does he?" Alex asked, taking a sip from her own mug.

"No, he was calling to warn me that the press are camped outside the front door," Olivia said pointedly.

"You're going to have to tell them something," Alex said.

"I just don't want to talk about it, Alex. It's bad enough that I lived through it. I don't want to relive all of those moments all over again," Olivia replied. Alex understood. Even she didn't know all of the details of what Olivia had experienced, but that didn't negate the fact that Olivia was going to have to face this. And, with the press swarming around her, pestering her for interviews, she was going to have to be forced into it sooner rather than later.

"What do you think, Liv? Time to call George?" Alex asked, her eyes locked with Olivia's.

**_So, whodunit? And is Olivia going to actually agree to call George? And how in the hell did the reporters get her phone number?_**

**_And yet another completely shameless plug, if you would like your very own copy of Lioness, you can find it at www. createspace. com/_** **_3587527 (no spaces). For all of the latest updates, please "Like" my fan page on Facebook. You can find it under "Summer Jayne."_**


	24. Chapter 24

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**Wow! I can't believe how much you all distrust EVERYONE! This makes me feel like I've confused you just as much as everything is confusing Liv right now. Ok, more story!**_

**Chapter 24**

Don Cragen pinched the bridge of his nose as he squeezed his eyes closed. The file in front of him contained Olivia's statement as well as Elliot's reports. Isaiah, Luke, Matthew…they were all Biblical names, and no one knew last names. The raid on the hospital had produced nothing concrete. The file cabinets in the administration offices had been emptied. He looked up in response to a knock on his open door.

"Captain, how do you want us to proceed with this one?" Elliot asked. His tie was loosened at the knot, his shirt coming untucked, and his pants wrinkled. The scruffiness on his face completed the disheveled look and complemented the dark bags under his eyes.

"You look like hell. Get some sleep," Cragen answered. Elliot shook his head.

"I'm not sleeping until I find the bastards that tortured Olivia," he said resolutely.

"Munch and Fin just got in. They can handle some of the leg work while you grab a couple of hours in the crib," Cragen replied.

"Captain…" Elliot began.

"It's not a request, Elliot," Cragen cut him off. Elliot gave a half-hearted nod and headed towards the crib. Cragen crossed to the open door of the office.

"Munch, Fin, got a minute?" he asked, gesturing to them to come into the office. The two men obeyed immediately.

"Our top priority at this point is Olivia's case," he began. "Start with Josh. See if you can get him to sit down with a sketch artist so we can match faces to names. Then pull case files to see if you can locate any other witnesses or potential victims that might fall in this group's M.O."

"What do you want us to do about the vultures circling our front steps?" Munch asked.

"Do what you always do. Stay professional, offer no comment at this time. Just avoid them as much as possible," Cragen replied, returning to his desk. Munch and Fin stepped back out into the squad room.

XxXxX

Elliot had changed into a pair of sweatpants and T-shirt that he usually reserved for working out and stretched across one of the lumpy cots in the crib. He had been forcing himself to stay awake, but now that he was prone, he felt his eyelids grow heavier than they weights he had bench pressed that morning. Behind his closed eyes, the wheels in his head were turning. No matter how professional he had tried to remain, no matter how many cases he had seen, he couldn't shake the images of his last undercover assignment from his head. Ok, in reality, it was one image. Olivia's brown eye fixed on him as she sat tied to a chair. They both knew she was going to be assaulted, and he hadn't been able to do anything about it. And yet, that knowledge hadn't stopped her from silently pleading with him to help her.

Why hadn't he grabbed her then? Somewhere, in the back of his mind, he knew that it had been because he couldn't jeopardize his cover, nor could he risk the lives of the innocent victims. _Not that it had mattered,_ he thought grimly. Anyone who had truly been innocent in that place had been executed, so all that his planning and hesitation had earned them was more pain and suffering on Olivia's part.

He wasn't sure how, but when he opened his eyes again, three hours had passed by. Determining that he had spent enough time away that the Captain would be satisfied, he showered and shaved quickly in the precinct locker room. He donned the spare set of clothes he kept in his locker for such days and headed back down to the bullpen.

"Elliot, you're just in time," Cragen said, crossing the bullpen to confront him.

"What's going on?" Elliot asked.

"Munch and Fin just found a body. Get down to Warner's office." Elliot nodded curtly and headed back out onto the streets. The Captain had been right. His head did feel clearer now that he had gotten some rest.

XxXxX

Elliot surveyed to body on the table. He was a finely dressed man, decked out in Gucci and Prada, but it was the face that caught Elliot's attention.

"Single gunshot wound to the head, virtually identical to all of the victims that were brought in earlier," Dr. Warner said. She didn't need to give him any more details. "Victim is unidentified. No wallet, no ID, just this." She held up another one of those damn prayer cards. This one bore a verse from Jeremiah. "Thou hast forsaken me, saith the LORD, thou art gone backward: therefore will I stretch out my hand against thee, and destroy thee; I am weary with repenting."

"It's Josh," Elliot whispered quietly.

"Who?" Melinda asked.

"Josh Parsons. He was working in the fashion design industry, and he was Liv's roommate when she was…" he trailed off, unable to complete his sentence. Melinda nodded to him, indicating that she understood what he was trying to say. A thought suddenly struck him. Josh had been voluntarily released and executed. Elliot presumed that this young man had gone back to his previous life and tried to move on as best as he could. If they were still watching him, was Olivia safe.

"Melinda, send over whatever you have to precinct. I need to go," Elliot said, racing out of the room, flipping open his phone at the same time.

"Munch," came the punctuated voice from the other end of the line.

"Did you get an ID on the body before he was moved to Warner's?" Elliot asked.

"No, we're canvassing the neighborhood now," Munch answered.

"He was connected to Olivia's case. Are you anywhere near her apartment?" Elliot asked.

"Not even close. We're in Chelsea," Munch stated. They were in Chelsea, probably somewhere in the 20s. Liv lived on E. 89th St. _Shit, _he thought. He needed to move Liv and Alex, just to be safe.

"Ok, keep doing whatever you're doing. I'll take care of Liv," Elliot said, sliding into his car. He flipped on his lights and sirens, but traffic was already thickening as the afternoon faded into evening. On the busy Manhattan streets, lights and sirens seemed to have little meaning to the other impatient motorists.

XxXxX

Alex sighed as she inserted the key into the lock on Olivia's apartment door. Even though she was still technically on leave, she had decided to go into her office to bring herself up to speed on what was happening and catch herself up on some of the never ending paperwork before her leave ended.

"Hi, honey," she called out. "Something smells good," she added as she spotted Olivia in the kitchen tending to a series of pots and pans on the stove.

"I picked up some fish from the market down the street earlier today," Olivia mentioned. "It should be ready in a few minutes if you want to get the table ready." For a brief moment, the room felt completely normal. Alex had just gotten home from work, and Olivia was throwing together one of her spectacular quick dinners. And then, Alex remembered everything.

"So, what have you been doing to keep yourself occupied all day?" Alex asked casually.

"I went for a walk, mostly to think about everything. Thanks for going in to the office today. I know you didn't want to leave, but I really needed time to myself," she said as she brought the food over to the table.

"You're right, I didn't want to leave, but I guess we're going to have to figure out what 'normal' is at some point," Alex replied, taking a seat at the table. "Did you call George?"

"I tried, but he must have been busy because I couldn't get an answer. I'll call him later when I know he won't be too busy to answer his phone," Olivia replied, taking her own seat.

"So," Alex began. "I'm trying to figure out the right thing to do here, Liv. Where do we go from here?"

"I need my life back. At some point, that's going to mean going back to work," Olivia said.

"I've been thinking about that. I can imagine that's going to be difficult," Alex replied.

"I'm not going to lie to you. There's a certain irony to working sex crimes that makes me a little uncomfortable, but I just can't see myself doing anything else. I feel needed and valued there, and I know I have a talent for working with victims," Olivia answered.

"You do, but is it worth your own mental health?" Alex asked.

"I don't know what's going to happen, but I have to try to go back. It's been a part of my life for so long now, I feel like something's missing without it. Of course, I'm still on the DL for at least another week, so we have a few days to think and discuss all of this," Olivia said. Both women were nearly finished with their meals when there was a knock on the door.

"Were you expecting anyone?" Alex asked.

"No," Olivia replied, rising to check the peephole. She relaxed when she saw the familiar face outside and opened the door.

"Elliot, what are you doing here?" she asked. He stepped over the threshold and immediately got down to business.

"Liv, I need you to pack a bag for a little while. You're not safe here," he said. He glanced over and caught sight of Alex. "You too, Alex."

"Hello to you too," Alex said.

"What do you mean we aren't safe here?" Olivia asked.

"We don't have time to discuss it. Just go," he said.

"Not until you tell me what's going on. I'm a big girl, El. I can take care of myself," she answered, placing her hands on her hips. Elliot took a deep breath.

"Munch and Fin found Josh executed earlier today. Definitely the work of the Prophets of Leviticus," he told her gravely.

_**Thoughts? Comments? Predictions? Leave 'em! I love to read them!**_

_**And yes, once again, if you would like your very own copy of Lioness, you can find it at www. createspace. com/**_ _**3587527 (no spaces). For all of the latest updates on Correction and other works, please "Like" my fan page on Facebook. You can find it under "Summer Jayne."**_


	25. Chapter 25

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**Thank you for all of your feedback on Chapter 24! Poor Josh…he didn't deserve to be murdered. He was genuinely trying to do what was best for everyone, even if he went about it poorly.**_

**Chapter 25**

Elliot could normally read his partner's face like an open book, but the slew of emotions that were playing across it now, he couldn't figure out what was going on in her mind. The expression didn't go unnoticed by Alex, either.

"What is it, Liv?" Alex asked, pausing as she cleared the table. Olivia rubbed her chin, trying to decide the best way to answer the blonde's question.

"Nothing," she finally answered. With that, she turned and headed into the bedroom. Alex walked over and stood next to Elliot, both staring at the door way Olivia just disappeared through.

"What was that all about?" Alex asked.

"I don't know, but there's something she isn't telling us," Elliot said, stepping forward to follow Olivia. Alex wanted to follow after them, but she knew just how close the two of them were. Elliot was far more likely to get the truth from her with less resistance than she was.

Elliot found Olivia sitting on the bed with her face buried in her hands. Two open suitcases were laid out. He pushed one aside and took a seat next to her.

"What's going on?" he asked softly. She immediately stood up and hid in her closet, trying to focus her mind on selecting the items she and Alex would need in the near future. "Josh was the reason we found you, you know. He really was a hero."

"Think whatever you want, Elliot, but Josh was no hero," Olivia said, piling clothes into one of the two suitcases. She turned and headed back into the closet. Elliot furrowed his brow.

"He came into the precinct after we had been spinning our wheels for days. Without him, we never would have had a solid lead," Elliot told her.

"And that's fine, and I'm glad you got the information you needed, but you have absolutely no idea what happened back there," she answered, tossing another pile into the suitcase and disappearing back into the closet.

"So tell me," Elliot replied.

"What?" she answered, standing in the doorway.

"Tell me what happened," Elliot repeated. She paused. As much as she didn't want to talk about her experiences, it was almost a physical pain keeping them inside.

"Do you know how he got out of there, Elliot?" she asked.

"No, he wouldn't tell us," Elliot answered. Olivia pursed her lips.

"In order to be released, you had to prove you were straight," Olivia replied.

"How in the hell…" Elliot started, and then he saw it. His eyes connected with hers and he knew. He didn't know how, but he knew. "He raped you, didn't he?" She didn't need to answer. Her eyes told the entire story. So instead, she turned back into the closet. "That's why he wouldn't answer anything without a lawyer," Elliot reasoned. Elliot crossed the room and stood in the doorway of the closet. "Olivia?"

"Every day, Elliot," she said, raising her voice, punctuating each word. "Every damn day someone raped me. I grew to expect it from Luke, but Josh seemed so nice in the beginning and then, he just…" Her voice trailed off. She still hadn't turned to face him.

"He must have done it to rescue you and everyone else in there," Elliot said. _Idiot, _he thought, as soon as the words slipped out of his mouth. Olivia threw down the blouse in her hand.

"I don't give a damn _why_ he did it. The point is, he decided he had the right to take what he needed from me just like every other person with a penis in that God-awful place," Olivia spat back.

From the kitchen, Alex could hear voices being raised as she turned on the dishwasher. Thought she couldn't make out specific words, she decided to investigate the source of her girlfriend's apparent anger. From the bedroom doorway, she could see Elliot in the doorway of the closet, effectively trapping Olivia inside.

"Everything ok in here?" she asked.

"Yeah, we're fine," Olivia said, pushing past Elliot and making a beeline for the bathroom.

"You should tell her, Liv," he replied.

"Tell me what?" Alex asked. Olivia returned to the bedroom with her arms full of toiletries.

"You should learn how to mind your own business," Olivia snapped back at Elliot.

"What happened?" Alex repeated. "Does this have something to do with this Josh guy Elliot mentioned earlier?" Olivia and Elliot exchanged glances, but neither of them spoke.

"Will one of you tell me what the hell is going on here?" she asked, feeling out of the loop once again.

"Josh was my roommate while I was being held," Olivia began. Her voice faltered, and she was suddenly unsure of how to continue with her story.

"He came to the precinct after he was released and told us exactly where to find Olivia, but what he didn't tell us was how he convinced them that he had been 'corrected.'" Elliot explained.

"'Corrected?' You mean he convinced them he was attracted to women?" Alex asked. Olivia nodded. "How?"

"By raping one," Elliot answered grimly. Alex's blue eyes snapped back towards Olivia.

"Oh my God," Alex whispered. "Liv, exactly how many men attacked you in there?" she asked, finding her voice again.

"Can we just drop this?" Olivia asked. "Please?" She needed to get away. She pushed past both of them and dropped herself onto the couch in the living room.

"She needs to talk about this, Alex," Elliot said softly.

"I know," Alex replied. "But I don't see that happening if we go into hiding somewhere."

"Can you take care of her?" Elliot asked. Alex was experiencing déjà vu.

_Alex sat in the diner at the back table nervously checking her watch. She had met with Elliot multiple times, but this time was different. They weren't meeting to discuss a case or even to have a meal together as friends. It was far more personal. Alex looked up and saw Elliot striding towards her, dressed casually, but he bore the same menacing look she had seen on his face as he interrogated suspects. He slid into the booth across from her._

"_She just got through a nasty break-up, you know," Elliot began after ordering two coffees._

"_I know," Alex replied. "And I can't imagine how hard it was for her to find out the person she supposedly loved was cheating on her."_

"_He wasn't just cheating on her, Alex. He had a girl for every night of the week. Olivia was just a number to him," Elliot told her. "She's more than that, so much more." _

"_You…you really care about her, don't you?" Alex asked._

"_We've been partners for twelve years. Sometimes I feel like I'm closer to her than I am to my own wife," Elliot had confided in her._

"_Can you take care of her, Alex? Can you treat her like a queen and give her everything she deserves?" Elliot asked._

"_I will, Elliot. I swear to you, I would never do anything to hurt her," Alex vowed._

"_You'd better not. Because if you do, you won't be answering you her. You'll be dealing with me." And with that, Elliot had stood from the booth, never breaking eye contact with her. He had sauntered out of the diner as quickly as he had arrived, but his point had been made. No one was going to mess with Olivia's heart on his watch._

"Listen, my parents have a summer place on Cape Cod. Why don't I take her there for a little while? I can get her some real counseling, and the ocean air might do her some good. Besides, the place is so secluded, it would be highly unlikely anyone would ever find us there," Alex suggested. Elliot considered her plan. The farther away from New York Olivia could get, the better. He nodded slowly.

"She's not going to agree to this easily, you know," he said.

"Let me handle that part. Just promise me you'll find the bastards that did this to her," Alex replied.

"You know I will," he said cockily. Alex headed into the living room.

"Liv?" she asked. Olivia looked up at the blonde woman who was lowering herself next to her on the couch. "Let's get out of here for a while."

"I thought that's what we were doing," she replied.

"No, I mean, let's get out of New York," Alex suggested.

"Alex, don't be ridiculous. We both have responsibilities here. You need to get back to work, and I plan to go back as soon as I can," Olivia replied.

"I know, but with the press camped out everywhere, calling all the time, and doing just about everything they can think of to get close to us, I think it would be better for us to just disappear until things quiet down for a bit," she answered.

"And exactly where do you want to go?" Olivia asked.

"I was thinking we could head up to my parents' summer home on the Cape," Alex said. Olivia opened her mouth to protest. "Before you say anything, think about how much you love it up there. It's so peaceful and relaxing, and we can leave the stresses of the city behind us. Just until this thing blows over."

"I don't know, Lex. I feel so much more at home in the city," Olivia countered.

"I'm scared, Liv," Alex said. "I don't want to think about the possibility of another break-in. And if they killed Josh, surely they'll be after you, too. I don't want to hear about your body being discovered in an alley."

"I can take care of myself," Olivia answered.

"I know you can, but that doesn't make me any less scared. Please, Liv. For me?" Alex flashed Olivia a look of innocence that she knew the brunette couldn't resist.

"Ok," Olivia answered. "If it means that much to you, we'll go."

_**Alex and Liv are leaving New York! Is this good or bad? What do you think? I'd love to hear your thoughts and theories! Feel free to join in on the discussions about this story and Lioness on my Facebook fan page under "Summer Jayne."**_


	26. Chapter 26

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**I find SVU marathons so inspiring! Thank you for all of your comments and reviews so far!**_

**Chapter 26**

Olivia sighed as she leaned back in the passenger seat of Alex's Mercedes. Elliot had followed them as far as the Connecticut border before turning back towards the city, just to ensure their safety. Again, it was probably overkill, but he wasn't about to take another chance with Olivia's life. He was surprised at how easily she had agreed to leave the city, and it occurred to him that her emotional scars may run far deeper than anyone realized.

"We'll get through this, you know," Alex said, breaking the comfortable silence in the car. Olivia turned toward the blonde and smiled.

"I know. I just…" Olivia began, but trailed off when she realized her doubts hadn't formed into words in her head.

"What?" Alex asked.

"I feel like everything's changed," she said.

"Well, yes. But one thing hasn't changed," Alex replied.

"Oh? What's that?" Olivia asked.

"I still love you more than anything in the world," she replied. Olivia smiled, and this time it wasn't a forced smile, as so many had been recently. It was genuine.

"I love you, too, Alex," Olivia replied.

"Do you really mean that, Olivia?" Alex asked. Olivia was stunned. Never before had Alex questioned what they had. It was always Olivia who was unsure; it was Olivia who had the doubts. Alex was the one who remained steadfast in her commitment and never asked the questions.

"Of course I mean it," Olivia replied. "Why on earth would you think otherwise?"

"Well, things between us have been strained ever since…" Alex began. She never bothered to finish that sentence. "I feel like we've been walking on eggshells around each other. Sometimes I feel like you read so much into everything, and I don't know what's going to set you off anymore."

"I…It's hard, Lex. I know I overanalyze everything, and I don't know why I do it either. I never used to be afraid of anything. I mean, I've had guns to put to my head – multiple times – and I never felt the paralyzing fear that I seem to feel at the smallest thing now," Olivia confessed.

"But why are you so afraid? I want to understand this, Liv. I really do," Alex said. Olivia wanted to run, and had they not been in a moving vehicle, she would have. She didn't like discussing her feelings or talking about how helpless and afraid she felt now.

"You don't know what it was like," Olivia answered.

"Tell me," Alex said. "Please." Olivia took a deep breath. She knew she would have to have this conversation sooner or later, and yet, her voice refused to obey her once again. "I know you can talk to Elliot because he was there. He understands things that I never will, but I really would like to know what happened. Maybe I'll never fully understand, but I want to try." Olivia knew that Alex wasn't trying to force her hand, and her questions really were out of genuine concern. Even still, Elliot had seen what happened with his own eyes. She didn't need to vocalize it with him.

"Do you remember that case we were discussing the night of the break-in?" Olivia began. Alex wracked her brain. That had seemed like so long ago. "The one with the rapist who was trying to 'correct' lesbians?" Olivia added at Alex's hesitation. Oh yes, that one. How could she have forgotten. To date, it had been the most shocking case she had heard of since she began her involvement with the NYPD's Special Victims Unit, a unit that she no longer worked with.

"Yeah. I remember we had a long conversation about that at dinner that night," Alex answered.

"It was more than just one rapist," Olivia began. "There's a group of them, and they call themselves the Prophets of Leviticus. The believe in an extremely strict, twisted interpretation of the Bible."

"That much I knew. But no one will give me anything more detailed than that," Alex told her.

"They roomed gays and lesbians together. We figured it was to discourage relationships between members of the same sex from getting too friendly," Olivia continued.

"And that's how you knew Josh," Alex filled in.

"Yeah. I met him on my first day there. Or, at least, my first conscious day there. He tried to help me. He told me not to fight them, to do what they told me to, and he was right. Life probably would have been easier if I had done that," Olivia went on.

"Somehow, I can't see you blindly following orders," Alex chimed in.

"I felt like I had to fight. Every instinct in me told me to fight, so I did. There was a man, Luke, who was supposed to 'train' me. They prayed around me all the time, and Luke…" Olivia felt the sob creep up her throat. She swallowed to force it back down. "Luke raped me multiple times in an effort to teach me that sex with a man can be pleasurable." Alex gripped the steering wheel so tightly her knuckles turned white. "But every time he touched me, I couldn't help but think of you. I felt like I was betraying you somehow…or at least, my body was." Alex stole a quick glance at Olivia, then fixed her eyes back on the road.

"Did you…did he make you…" Alex tried to ask.

"Nearly 4 years of experience in sex crimes and you still can't say the word 'orgasm,'" Olivia said, in a pitiful effort to lighten the mood and take the spotlight off of herself. Alex's face reddened. As quickly as the mood lightened, it fell somber again. "Yeah, Alex, he did. Multiple times."

"You have to know that I don't blame you for that. You and I both know that a physical response has nothing to do with consent," Alex replied.

"I do know that. I've told it to every victim who told me they were aroused or orgasmed during a rape. Now I know how hollow those words are," Olivia answered.

"You weren't unfaithful to me, Olivia. You were forced to do what you did. Whatever your body did, I know that wasn't a reflection of what's in your heart." Alex turned the wheel and the car slid down the narrow road that twisted through a thicket of trees opening up to a clearing. The Cabot family summer home sprawled before them. It was an old colonial, complete with a widow's walk perched on the roof. Alex parked the car in front of the house and walked around to the trunk to retrieve their suitcases. Olivia stepped out of the car and gazed up at the house.

It was far more pretentious than anything she ever dreamed she would have access to. There were 6 bedrooms, all decent sizes, plus a den and family room in addition to the normal living room and kitchen space. And yet, Olivia strangely felt home here. It was so different from the way she grew up in Manhattan, but she found the atmosphere serene and relaxing. She lifted her own suitcase and followed Alex inside and up the two flights of stairs to the sprawling master suite situated on the top floor of the house. The room boasted the best views of the ocean beyond the house, and it was certainly the most comfortable. Alex began immediately unpacking their things while Olivia stepped out onto the deck. She inhaled the sea breeze and felt the wind blow her hair away from her face.

"Hey, Beautiful," Alex said after a few moments, slipping her slim arms around Olivia face and nuzzling the side of her neck. Olivia let out a soft moan and placed her hands on top of the blonde's. A tear slipped down Olivia's cheek.

"What is it?" Alex whispered in her ear.

"I can't believe you still want me now that you know," Olivia said in a hushed tone. Alex turned Olivia in her arms to face her. She brought a hand up to the brunette's cheek and cupped her face, using her thumb to wipe away the tear.

"I love you, Olivia Benson. All of you. The parts you want to hide just as much as the parts you want to show me. Nothing will ever change that," Alex answered. She leaned in and touched Olivia's lips ever so lightly with her own. The kiss was soft and gentle, but at the same time strong in its resolve. And for the first time since Olivia escaped, she felt an echo of the love she had felt before everything had changed.

XxXxX

"Luke, come in. Have a seat."

"I have a confession to make, sir," Luke began. The other man put down his pen and gave Luke his full attention.

"I overstepped my bounds with one of my charges," Luke began.

"How so, my son?"

"I had sex with her," Luke answered. "Multiple times."

"Temptation is around us all of the time. We must be steadfast in our resolve and fight it when confronted by it."

"I know. I have sinned, and for that I am truly repentant," Luke responded.

"Who was it, my son?"

"Olivia Benson," Luke answered.

"I can understand where you would be tempted by her. She was quite stunning, but you must be careful around her. She has murdered one of our own already. However, you have sworn to live your life in accordance to Scripture, and therefore you are bound by the covenants therein. Do you wish to make amends and return to a godly lifestyle?"

"More than anything, sir." Luke answered. "I just need guidance on what to do next." The other man retrieved the Bible from the corner of his desk and flipped it open.

"Deuteronomy. Chapter 22, verses 28 and 29. 'If a man is caught in the act of raping a young woman who is not engaged, he must pay fifty pieces of silver to her father. Then he must marry the young woman because he violated her, and he will never be allowed to divorce her.'" He looked up at Luke upon finishing the verse. "It seems pretty clear to me. In forcing yourself on her, you have promised yourself to her. To make restitution, you must deliver fifty dollars to her father, and the two of you must be wed at once."

"What do I do if she has no father?" Luke asked.

"Then you must find the one who she looks up to as a father. He will be the one you owe the debt to. Once it has been paid, and she is recovered, you two will be wed."

_**Please feel free to comment and review. I love the feedback! Follow me on Facebook (Summer Jayne) or on Twitter (bensonfan711).**_


	27. Chapter 27

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

**Chapter 27**

Olivia rolled over for the fourth time in twenty minutes. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't find a position that was comfortable enough to sleep in. First, her neck felt awkward. Then her shoulders. Then her left arm, and now her back. Meanwhile, Alex was sleeping peacefully next to her, blissfully unaware of the commotion her girlfriend was causing. Out of frustration, Olivia threw the covers back and climbed out of the massive king sized bed. She padded over to the sitting area of the master suite and lit a fire in the fireplace. Though the house was old, it had been retrofitted with gas fireplaces, so all it took was a flick of a switch and a warm glow filled the room. The sea air had brought a chill to the room, so Olivia wrapped herself in an afghan and curled up on the sofa to watch the flames dance.

Her mind felt chaotic, disorganized. It was like thoughts were trying to form, but there was some sort of disconnect, and nothing coherent was coming to the surface. She needed it to settle. If she could relax her mind, then she could relax her body, and sleep would come.

Alex reached for Olivia in her sleep. Feeling emptiness instead of the brunette stirred her from her slumber. Gazing across the room, she saw the silhouette of her girlfriend basked in the glow emitted from the fireplace.

"Liv?" she said so softly she wasn't sure it was audible. But to Olivia, the voice sounded like a gunshot on a silent night, causing her to visibly jump. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you,"

"It's ok," Olivia said, as her breathing returned to normal. "I was just thinking." She volunteered no further information, but merely turned back towards the fire. Alex circled the sofa and curled up next to her, enveloping Olivia in her arms. Olivia instinctively curled an arm around the blonde and placed a gentle kiss on the top of her head.

"Can't sleep?" Alex asked.

"No," she answered.

"Nightmares?" Alex asked.

"No, surprisingly enough. Of course, I'd have to sleep first to be able to have nightmares," Olivia replied.

"I wish I could take all of your demons away, Liv," Alex said, looking up into Olivia's brown eyes. She wanted to see what lay beyond them. She wanted to take all of those images and thoughts that terrorized her, wrap them into a box and toss them in the fire. There was a sadness to those eyes where a sparkle had been before.

"No, Alex. The only peace of mind I have out of this whole mess is knowing that you never suffered in that hellhole. You escaped that night. Knowing you were safe the whole time is what keeps me from completely falling apart," Olivia answered.

Alex brought her lips to Olivia's. She had meant for the kiss to be gentle, but Olivia intensified it quickly. Alex shifted to straddle Olivia, never breaking the kiss. The movement elicited a moan from Olivia. The brunette's hands slithered around the blonde's waist and crept down to cup her ass. Alex pulled back and looked at Olivia questioningly.

"Alex, please, don't shut me out," Olivia murmured. She pressed her forehead against the blonde's. "Please, let me feel you."

"Liv, I want to…oh, God!" Olivia had found a particularly sensitive spot on Alex's neck with her lips. "Are you sure you're ready for this?"

"All I know is that I want to be inside you," Olivia said. Her hands had found their way inside the elastic band of Alex's cotton pajama pants, and she was gently squeezing the blonde's ass. Olivia stood up, bringing Alex with her. Alex instinctively wrapped her legs around Olivia and kissed her deeply as Olivia stumbled back towards the bed.

Olivia hovered over Alex, relishing the view of her porcelain lover's face, surrounded by the blonde halo. Her fingertips played along the hem of Alex's camisole, pushing it back to revel the flat terrain of Alex's stomach. Olivia bent down and nipped at the exposed flesh, immediately using her tongue to soothe away the hurt. She pushed the garment higher, and Alex responded by lifting her back enough for Olivia to get it off and toss it aside. Olivia worked her way towards Alex's left breast, teasing at the swollen flesh, circling until she came into contact with an already taut nipple.

Alex rolled the two of them so that she was on top of Olivia, lifting Olivia's T-shirt off of her as she moved them. Olivia felt a surge of fear rip through her as Alex's legs pinned her to the bed.

_Luke was watching her. He was telling her she must obey him. She cried out, fighting to push him off of her. He slowed down, but didn't stop. His hands were everywhere on her, pulling at her clothing, exposing every part of her._

As quickly as it had appeared, it vanished, and she was once again swept up in the moment. She blinked and Luke's face was replaced by Alex's. Alex felt her lover stiffen.

"Are you ok?" she asked, stopping her movements.

"I'm fine, Lex," Olivia answered. "Don't stop." Alex bent down and began to kiss around Olivia's collarbone.

_Luke's lips were on her, all over her. He was touching the most intimate places of her. She reached up to push him off of her, but his hands easily encircled her wrists, and he pinned them down. She struggled as much as she could, trying to get away, but knowing the whole time that her efforts were futile. She was strong, but he was stronger._

A strangled cry slipped past her lips, pain clearly evident. Alex stopped what she was doing for a second time.

"You're not ok, are you, Liv," she asked.

"I'm fine, baby, really," Olivia insisted.

"It wasn't a question," Alex answered, sliding off of her lover. She retrieved her top as Olivia slipped her own T-shirt back on. Alex wrapped Olivia in her arms and pulled the brunette's head to her chest like a mother comforting a small child. "It's going to take time, sweetie. And we have all the time in the world. You don't need to rush this." Olivia felt safe in Alex's arms, which is why she couldn't figure out why being pinned by Alex made her so scared. A tear fell from Olivia's eye. Followed by another. Then another. She wasn't sure where this sudden flood of emotion came from, but before she realized what was happening, she was clutching Alex's shirt and her body was heaving in sobs.

"Hey, shhhh…it's ok. Oh, Liv, honey, I love you so much," Alex said, pulling Olivia closer to her and stroking her hair.

"I want him out of my head!" Olivia screamed.

"I know, baby, I know," Alex said, continuing to soothe her girlfriend. "Go ahead, let it out. I'm not going anywhere." Olivia sobbed harder than she had in a long time, gripping at Alex's shirt. "It's ok, it's all ok now."

"Don't leave me," Olivia said through her sobs.

"Never," Alex answered. After a long while, Alex felt Olivia's body slacked and the vice grip on her shirt released. Olivia's breathing fell into a slow steady pattern, and Alex was silently grateful that she had found rest. She prayed, as Olivia's mind retreated into a place where no one could follow, that she would not be haunted by her past. Olivia desperately needed peace, even if it was only for a few fleeting hours.

XxXxX

Captain Cragen flipped through the stack of envelopes on his desk. It contained standard forms from other departments, advertisements for various professional development seminars, and a single white envelope with the mailing information typed out. Curious, he slipped a letter opener into the flap and ripped it open. Inside, was a single sheet of paper and a fifty dollar bill.

_Captain Cragen,_

_Please consider this a debt paid in full._

_P.O.L._

Was this some sort of bribe? He needed to file the appropriate paperwork to ensure that he would be protected should anything come out of this. He took the contents of the envelope, along with an incident report, forwarded the entire package to Internal Affairs, and gave the matter no further thought.

XxXxX

Luke felt liberated. Now that the letter had been delivered, he was free to continue his search for Olivia. He already knew that she was no longer staying with Alex; that apartment had been vacant since the night Olivia had arrived at the training facility. He was fairly sure that the two women were staying at Olivia's apartment. As he approached the building, he saw the lights off, and the cop car parked in front of the building.

The police had proven that they were not godly people. They followed the laws of the land rather than the laws laid down in Scripture. He wasn't good at handling these sorts of things; that was Isaiah's specialty. He would have to return and wait for a plan to recover Olivia. Patience was a virtue, after all.

_**I'm tired, so this note will be very brief. What's in store for Olivia and Alex? Figured out who's responsible for any of this yet? Keep reading! Oh, and please take a minute to review either here or on Twitter (BensonFan711).**_


	28. Chapter 28

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

**Chapter 28**

A loud bang echoed through the room, jolting both Alex and Olivia awake. A rush of wind swept over the women's bodies, with a frigidness to it that hinted at the approaching colder weather. Olivia whipped her head around and noticed the window that overlooked the ocean was wide open and now flapping annoyingly against the wall. She shook her head and climbed out of bed.

As she pulled the windows closed and refastened the latch, she glanced out at the ocean that expanded beyond the house. The waves were capped with white tips and a fine mist was settling over the earth.

"We're in for a storm," Alex commented from the bed. And then Olivia saw it. A figure, vaguely human shaped walking along the beach. It was too far away for her to make out anything other than human.

"Alex, are there any other houses around here," Olivia asked.

"No, why?" Alex asked.

"There's someone on the beach," Olivia replied. Alex grumbled and climbed out of bed to investigate Olivia's claim.

"Olivia, there's no one there," Alex said, standing next to Olivia.

"Yes there is, right over…" Olivia raised a finger to point, but as she turned back to the spot where she had seen the figure, there was nothing.

"It was probably just a shadow or something. Come on, it's cold. Let's go back to bed," Alex suggested, padding back to her previous spot. Olivia took one last look outside the window. The ocean was still heaving, but there was nothing on the beach. Maybe Alex was right. Maybe it was just a trick of the eye. She double checked the lock on the window and headed back to bed.

XxXxX

Elliot pulled up the file on Liv's case in the media room of the precinct. The massive screen filled with images of the prayer cards, Josh, and the sketches of their suspects, combined with their assigned Biblical names. His eyes focused on the prayer cards. Every time he saw one of those damn things, he couldn't shake the notion that they looked somehow familiar. The print shop where they were made hadn't given him much information. They had been paid for in cash, and the clerk that had handled the order was no longer with the store. She was now in France on a study abroad program. Elliot's phone rang, snapping him away from his thoughts. _Shit,_ he thought looking at the caller ID. It was the call he had been dreading.

"Hey, Liv," he answered. "How's New England?"

"Fine. Foggy, rainy and otherwise completely dull. Anything new on my case?" she asked.

"Liv…" he began, not knowing how to finish.

"You've got nothing," she answered. Elliot wanted to tell her something, anything to give her hope, but he had nothing. "Still there?"

"Yeah, and you're right. We grasping at straws right now. Listen, Liv, I'll keep you posted," he told her. He heard a sigh from the other end of the line.

"I'm going to come back and give you a hand," she said.

"No, Liv, stay where you are. We don't know where or even who these guys are at this point. You and Alex are both safer where you are," he said quickly.

"Elliot, I was there. I have more inside knowledge than any of you," she countered.

"You sure about that? Because I was there too, and trust me, you don't even know the half of it," Elliot snapped. As instantly as the words were out of his mouth, he wanted to swallow them back. "Liv, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap." There was a long silence from the other end of the line.

"Fuck you, Elliot," she answered finally. _Click._ Though he was sorry he had hurt her feelings, Elliot was secretly thankful that he had pissed her off. He knew from previous experience that she would fume until she was ready to explode at him, but at least she would stay where she was.

"You ok?" Munch asked, having overheard Elliot's raised voice.

"No," he answered. "But I will be, just as soon as we nail these bastards."

"Well, I found something that might help you do just that," Munch replied. He motioned for Elliot to follow him, and the two men bent over Munch's computer.

"The press got ahold of Liv's story pretty quickly," Munch began. "So someone had to tip them off. Now, who knew her story?"

"Alex, us, the perps…" Elliot listed. Fin's fingers flew across the keyboard. Another screen came up.

"Officer Young," Munch said as a photo displayed itself line by line across the screen.

"He's one of ours," Elliot said, reading the information. Fin nodded.

"And, there was a big fat deposit in the amount of $25,000 that went into his account from the _Ledger_ the day after Liv filed her report," Munch replied, showing Elliot the financial evidence he needed.

"Son of a bitch," Elliot answered. "Where's Young now?"

"Christmas is going to be a little early, my friend. Fin's picking him up as we speak."

XxXxX

"So, what are your plans for today?" Alex asked as she and Olivia shared coffee in the breakfast nook.

"I was thinking we should probably head into town and pick up some supplies. I heard on the news this morning that a nor'easter is heading our way," Olivia replied. Alex nodded.

"The power in this house seems to go out if you so much as sneeze, so that's probably a good plan," Alex answered. Alex thought back to what Olivia had said the night before, about seeing a figure on the beach. It wasn't the first time someone in this town had seen a figure who apparently disappeared. Like any old New England town, this one was filled with history and stories, some based in fact, but most were nonsense.

The house she was standing in certainly had history. Before the Cabots had staked their claim on it, it had belonged to mostly high ranking officers aboard early naval ships, and before that, it had belonged to the first colonists in the country. The house had a legend attached to it, which Alex thought was fascinating when she was a teenager, but now that she was an adult, she considered it fiction. Still, it was a story that entertained the children of the vast Cabot clan, and they had great fun using the tale to their advantage at Halloween time.

"Ok, I'm going to head out for a run, and then we can head out," Olivia replied, giving Alex a quick peck on the cheek before heading out to the beach. While she normally ran on the city blocks that surrounded her apartment building, Olivia's favorite place to run was along the beach. The change in scenery distorted her perception of how far and how long her runs lasted, leaving her with a much longer workout than normal.

She stretched briefly before setting out along the coastline. Olivia started off an easy jog, picking up her pace as she fell into the zone. Her mind always felt so clear when she ran. She lost track of how far she had gone when she noticed movement along the beach. A human figure.

"Hey, wait!" she yelled and ran towards her morning companion. The figure moved again. Olivia could make out more details now than she had the night before. It was a woman with long, waist-length dark, almost black hair. She was shrouded in a gauzy white material that billowed in the breeze. The figure turned towards Olivia and seemed to glide in the opposite direction.

"Wait!" Olivia yelled again, and as she did, she stumbled. She looked down to see one of her shoelaces had come undone. She bent down to retie the show and glanced back up to find her mystery woman. Once again, she had vanished. Olivia jogged over to where the woman had been and looked around. There were no footprints along the beach where she had been and no disturbed earth.

_You're losing it, Benson,_ Olivia thought. But she knew she wasn't crazy. She _had_ seen someone. Right?

_**I can't wait to hear all of your opinions and theories about what's going on now. You all know what to do! Feel free to review either here or on Twitter (BensonFan711).**_


	29. Chapter 29

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**I'm glad you all are thinking about the mystery woman! I hope you enjoy the next installment.**_

**Chapter 29**

Olivia strolled through the back door and made a beeline to the fridge. She extracted a bottle of water and took a big swig, relishing the coolness that passed through her otherwise heated body. Alex entered the kitchen, having showered and dressed for the day in jeans and a casual top with her hair swept into a perfect ponytail. She caught site of her girlfriend in leggings and a form fitting athletic top holding the bottle to her lips as the cool liquid slipped down her throat. The sight alone made her swallow hard.

"Hey," Olivia said, returning the water to the fridge and closing the door.

"Hi, hon. How was your run?" Alex asked, crossing the room to give the brunette a peck on the cheek. He nose was assaulted by the stench of sweat. "Ugh…go shower," she said light-heartedly. Olivia chuckled.

"That's exactly where I was headed," she replied. Just as she was about to leave the room, she turned back towards Alex. She thought better of it and proceeded to the bathroom, where she deposited her sweaty clothes in the hamper and stepped into the shower. As the water cascaded over her body, she couldn't quite get the image of the mystery woman on the beach out of her head. She knew that if she told Alex about what had happened during her run, Alex would think she was crazy. Even still, the detective in her wanted to try to extract as much information as possible out of the attorney.

She finished up her shower and dressed in the same manner as Alex and headed back downstairs. As she retrieved her purse from the living room, movement from outside caught her eye once more. She scurried towards the window and the same woman was walking down the beach.

"You ready?" Alex asked. Olivia turned towards the blonde at the sound of her voice.

"Yeah…" she answered, turning back towards the window. Once again, the figure had vanished, but the movement wasn't unnoticed by Alex.

"What is it?" Alex asked.

"Are you sure there's no one around?" Olivia asked.

"Positive," Alex replied. "The Becketts have owned the house next to ours for the last several generations, and they leave for Florida on Labor Day weekend every year like clockwork. And the Newtons live on the other side, but they rent out the place during the summer months only. They keep talking about selling it every now and then, but I doubt it will ever happen. Liv, it's October. Anyone who isn't local has already left for the season."

"You're absolutely sure? There's no way anyone could have moved in in the meantime?" Olivia asked.

"Nope. I would have heard about it. My family gets all of the news from this town. I feel like I practically grew up here, since we've spent every summer vacation here since the day I was born. Why are you asking so many question?"

"No reason," Olivia answered, shaking her head.

"Maybe it's the ghost," Alex muttered.

"Maybe it's…what?" Olivia asked.

"The ghost. Oh, come on, Olivia. I wasn't being serious, but this is a sleepy little New England town, full of folklore and superstition," Alex answered, trying to play off the whole thing.

"Any story that specifically comes to mind?" Olivia asked, pressing the issue. Alex rolled her eyes.

"Ok, fine, have a seat," Alex said, as the two settled in the living room. "There's this story that goes along with this house. Supposedly, it was built by a British sea captain who defected to the U.S. during the Revolutionary War. Rumors surrounded in the town that he was secretly feeding information back to the British, and he became the most hated man in town. But there was a woman who was madly in love with him, and she believed he was being truthful when he swore that he wasn't a traitor. Eventually, the two married, and they lived here, ostracized by the rest of the town.

"He remained separate and apart from the rest of the town, refusing to go anywhere or do anything. She, however, had grown up here and wished to maintain her friendships and familial ties. Ultimately, she found herself in quite the predicament. As peaceful and loving as she was, she was married to the most hated man in town. She began receiving threats and hate mail from the community.

"One night, her husband decided that he was fed up with the entire situation, and he hated that his wife was not only miserable, but afraid. He ventured out for some unknown reason, and when he came home, he found her in a pool of blood. He immediately flew into a rage and vowed to hunt down the person responsible for murdering the love of his life. And yet, as he held her in his arms, she uttered her final word.

"'Don't avenge my death. Let the hatred end here,' she told him, and then there was nothing more. To honor her memory, her husband did not seek out her murderer, but instead returned to Britain, heartbroken. Unwelcomed by the British, she found himself without a land, and he committed suicide. Supposedly, the wife's spirit stayed around this house, watching over its inhabitants, ensuring that a sense of peace was preserved on this land." Alex finished up the tale, but she could tell by the expression on Olivia's face that the brunette wasn't altogether sure what to make of the story.

"Olivia, it's just a story," Alex said, emphasizing the fictitious aspect of all of this. "My cousins and I used to scare each other with our own renditions when we were kids, but seriously, drop it, ok?"

"Sure," Olivia said, scolding herself once more for letting her imagination run away with her. There had to be a perfectly reasonable explanation to all of this. Legends like these always popped up when people needed a way to explain the unexplainable. Together, the women exited the house, climbed into Alex's Mercedes, and headed into town.

From the first time Alex had brought Olivia up here last summer, she had fallen in love with the charming little seaside town. The center of town was a typical New England style town with a row of two- and three-story buildings that lined both sides of the narrow road. Each building had a storefront on the ground level and apartments or office space on the floors above. Wood siding in blue-grays, reds, and yellows completed the picturesque picture. When the town was founded, each business had its own flag. When the business was open, the flag would be prominently displayed next to the door, and it would be taken down at closing time. This tradition was still used today. If there were no computers, electronics, or cars, Olivia would almost swear she had been transported back to the 1600s.

Alex parked the car on the street and two woman strolled down the sidewalk hand in hand. They paused at several of the stores to pick up candles, water, food, and other necessities. Periodically, they paused to stow their purchases in the trunk of Alex's car.

"Jenna!" Olivia heard a woman yell. She turned her head down an alley. There was a storefront she hadn't noticed, tucked behind the main street. "Will you help me unload this stuff?" While Olivia couldn't see the woman doing the talking, she saw a thin, petite young woman, who must have been 20-years-old at the absolute oldest, come scurrying out to the front. She opened the hood of the 1960s era red Volkswagen Beetle and started pulling out boxes and carrying them into the store. A gust of wind blew, whipping Olivia's hair in her face.

"Liv?" Alex asked. "Lunch?" Clearly Alex had been trying to communicate something to Olivia, which she had completely ignored.

"What? Oh, sure, Lex," Olivia replied. Alex took Olivia to a small restaurant near the docks the stretched beyond the main street. The two women made small talk as they enjoyed a lunch of the most amazing clam chowder Olivia had tasted in her entire life. Alex enjoyed how easy it was to be with Olivia right now. It had been like this at the beginning of their relationship; relaxing and calm, before the kidnapping, before the multiple rapes, and before religion had driven a wedge between them. As much as Alex didn't want to hurt Olivia, she wasn't sure that she could give up her reconnection to her faith. She desperately wished that Olivia could see that not all religious groups were the same. In fact, it was possible, that Olivia may find comfort within the very walls Alex had initially. But, that community was back in New York, and they were here now.

They paid for their meal and left the restaurant, eager to return home. The sky was taking an ominous look, and they knew it wouldn't be long before it would start to pour.

"Can you give me spare a minute, hon? I just want to pop in and say hello to some friends." Alex gestured to Olivia to follow her, but the brunette shook her head.

"You go. There's something I want to check out. Meet back at the car in, say, half an hour?" Olivia suggested.

"Ok, see you then," Alex answered. Olivia walked back towards the storefront she had seen earlier. She made her way down the alley and noticed the sign over the door. _Crossroads_. It had the same New England charm the rest of the town did, but there was something that drew her to the store. She noticed the front door. Wrought iron bars covered the glass, but there was an intricate leaf design that made the door look more like a work of art than a prison.

Olivia pulled open the door and stepped inside, accompanied by the jingling of a bell on the door. The store was an eclectic mix of items. She saw Buddhist statues, angel figurines, crystals, incense, and burners of all types. There were crosses and other symbols she didn't immediately recognize. Beautiful jewelry made from gemstones sat in various display cases. A simple sign was posted at the entrance of the shop that read "Welcome, Travelers. This is a community of peace. We ask that you respect all beliefs, and in turn we will respect yours." Olivia felt almost as if she was being wrapped in a blanket of safety in this place, and later she wouldn't be able to describe the feeling again without sounding completely crazy. Behind the counter was the young woman she had seen pulling boxes out of the old Beetle, but an older, dark-haired woman stepped out from a room off to the side.

"You're the woman from the beach," Olivia said. The woman smiled.

"I'm not, but I've been expecting you," she replied. "I'm Angela."

_**Thoughts? Comments? Remarks? You know what to do. You can either leave a review here, on Facebook (Summer Jayne), or on Twitter (BensonFan711).**_


	30. Chapter 30

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

**Chapter 30**

Olivia stared at the woman, dumbstruck. She was beautiful. She stood just over five feet tall, but she had a presence that commanded the attention of the room. Her waist-length jet black hair hung loosely around her body, framing her angular pale face. Her bright eyes echoed with wisdom, yet held the excitement and awe of a child. They were a brilliant shade of…blue? No, that wasn't it. Violet. They definitely had a distinct violet color that Olivia had only seen achieved with the aid of contact lenses. A pair of flared jeans and a modestly printed peasant top flattered her slim figured, and a pair of strappy sandals encased her perfectly pedicured feet. A moonstone necklace and drop earrings completed the look.

"What do you mean, 'you've been expecting me?'" Olivia asked when she regained the use of her voice.

"The cards said you would be coming by today. Come, I'll show you." Angela motioned to Olivia to follow her back into the room she had emerged from. It was a tiny room, smaller than Alex's massive walk-in closet in New York. There was barely room for a table and two chairs. Angela drew the curtain in the doorway and sat in one of the chairs while Olivia took the unoccupied chair. She glanced at the numerous cards spread out on the table, but she had no idea what they meant.

"This is you," Angela said, pointing to one of the cards. _The Hanged Man,_ the caption on the card read. "You're lost. And the surrounding cards tell me that you have experiences a wound of the gravest sort, one that no one else can begin to understand. Or at least, you believe that no one can understand. But it can get better. You can find yourself again, with help." A chill ran through Olivia. How could this woman possibly know all of this? Olivia studied her intently. Angela laughed. "Don't worry, Olivia, I'm not here to hurt you. On the contrary, actually, but only if you ask for the help. Too many choices have already been made for you. You must choose where you will go from here."

"How…how did you know my name?" Olivia asked. Angela shrugged.

"Your guardian angel told me," she answered.

"Who are you?" Olivia asked.

"Someone who can help you find your way again, if that is what you desire. Otherwise, you are free to walk out the door and never to return," Angela replied. Olivia glanced at her watch. Her half hour was almost up.

"I have to go," Olivia said quickly, jumping up from her chair and making a beeline for the door.

"Olivia, wait…before you leave," Angela stopped her. She took a key from the counter and unlocked one of the display cases. She extracted a necklace with a pewter bird pendant and a gemstone embedded in the artwork. "Take this, as my gift to you."

"No, I couldn't…" Olivia began. Angela laid the necklace around Olivia's neck, and pushed her hand to it gently.

"It belongs to you. The pendant is a phoenix. The phoenix is a bird that is reborn from the ashes of destruction. You, too, can be reborn into a stronger, more powerful person. And the stone in its clutches is moonstone, which the stone of the Goddess and feminine healing. Take it, please. I insist," Angela said in her gentle tone.

"Thank you," Olivia replied, digging in her purse for her wallet.

"That's not necessary, Olivia. It is my gift to you," Angela replied, waving away Olivia's money. Olivia took one last look at Angela's kind face and turned to leave the store, heading down the alley towards Alex's car. Olivia heard a distant roll of thunder as she approached the main street. Alex was a few steps away, punctual as ever.

"Let's get going before the rain starts," Olivia suggested as they hurried into the car.

XxXxX

Elliot poured himself a drink and collapsed onto the beat up sofa in his living room. He had finally consented to spending a little time at home after Officer Young had been arrested. He knew that Olivia was suffering horribly, but what he hope no one had noticed was that he had been suffering, too. He hated to see her hurt in any way, and what he had witnessed at the compound was weighing heavily on his mind.

"Tough case?" Kathy asked from the doorway of the living room.

"You have no idea," Elliot said.

"Wanna talk about it?" she asked, knowing that he'd never be able to disclose the details of a case, but he might choose to disclose his feelings. He studied her intently as she walked over and perched herself next to him on the sofa.

"I don't know, Kath. I thought I had seen it all. I mean, the absolute worst that humanity could come up with, and I had seen it," Elliot started, not really sure where he was going with any of this.

"What makes this one so different?" she asked.

"It's Liv this time," he answered. Kathy leaned back at the sound of Olivia's name. For years, she had been afraid that something was going on between Elliot and Olivia, but then Elliot had confided in her that Olivia thought she was a lesbian. Kathy knew all along that Elliot had been attracted to Olivia, but after that, she had stopped worrying. Still, she knew that Elliot's friendship with Olivia was closer than any she had ever seen, and there was a symbiotic relationship between the two. While they weren't romantically involved, it was almost as if one couldn't survive without the other.

"Call her," Kathy told him.

"What?" he answered, looking at her quizzically.

"Call. Her," Kathy repeated with more emphasis. "You won't sleep until you do." She waited until he pulled out his cell phone before leaving the room to give him some privacy.

XxXxX

Luke sat in his tiny apartment waiting for the phone to ring. When it did, he answered it on the first ring.

"Isaiah?" he asked.

"I've found her Luke. She's on Cape Cod. I'm sending the directions to your phone. Go find her," Isaiah said, and then the line went dead. Luke grinned as he retrieved the directions and headed for his own car.

XxXxX

Olivia loved thunderstorms, so it was no great surprise that she was sitting on the deck watching the lightning flash in the distance. Her mind was full of so many questions and doubts. She played with the phoenix pendant around her neck absent-mindedly as she contemplated her encounter with Angela.

"Liv? Your phone's ringing," Alex said, stepping out onto the deck to hand the device to Olivia. The brunette immediately answered the call.

"Hi, El," she said. Alex went back into the house to give Olivia her privacy.

"Hey. How are you doing?" he asked.

"I'm ok. Any news on my case?" she asked.

"A little. We found out how the press knew about you," he answered.

"How?"

"Officer Young accepted a payoff for information," he answered. He knew he was being blunt, but Olivia hated when he tip-toed around information.

"He…what?" she asked, anger rising in her.

"I know, I know. Don't worry about it, though. He's been taken into custody for accepting a bribe. You don't have to worry about him anymore," Elliot told her quickly.

"What about Luke?" she asked. Elliot sighed on the other end of the line, effectively answering her question. "I assume I'm not coming home any time soon?"

"We don't have any leads yet, but we're working on it. We'll get them, Liv. You have to believe that," Elliot said. He paused for a moment. "How are you doing?"

"I have good days, and days that aren't so good," she answered honestly. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure," he answered.

"Well, you believe in God and angels and all that stuff, right?" she asked.

"Yes," he answered.

"Do you think…has there ever been a report of angels being seen on earth?" she asked.

"Well, there are those who have claimed to have visions or witness miracles. The Vatican has authenticated some of those claims, but personally, Liv, I don't know," he answered honestly. "Why? What's going on?"

"Nothing," she answered, realizing that her story would sound completely silly if she repeated it to him.

"Liv, if you've found something that gives you hope, go with it. I accept that there are things that happen here on earth that can only be explained by God. I know you're leery of anything religious right now, and I don't blame you, but if you've found something that is touching you on a spiritual level, run with it," he told her. She wondered how he did that. He always managed to answer her questions when she couldn't even form them in her own head. She didn't believe in psychics and tarot cards, and yet, Angela had been so accurate. The logical part of her brain told her to forget about the store and Angela and all of the other crazy things she had experienced over the last couple of days, but something in her wanted to cling to it. She was afraid that if she didn't find something to hold on to, she would break into so many pieces, she would never be able to put them all back together again.

"Elliot?" she asked after a long pause.

"Yeah, Liv," he answered softly.

"Thank you," she replied. No more words were needed. He understood that she was not only thanking him for validating her, but for being her friend and confidante. He felt like her other half in many ways, and she couldn't imagine a day without him.

"Any time, Liv. Take care of yourself," he said before they hung up. While Olivia had been on the phone, the wind had picked up speed and was now holding her hair completely off her face. The flashes of lightning had turned into bolts that were steadily creeping closer to shore, and as much as she wanted to stay outside, she knew it was safer for her to go in. No sooner had she stepped into the house when the doorbell rang. She rolled her eyes and walked to the front door. Pulling it open, she saw Angela standing on the stoop, black hair flying madly in the wind.

"You are not safe here," Angela said. "Gather your things. You can stay with me tonight. Your girlfriend, too."

_**Well now, this could be very interesting. Does Olivia trust Angela enough to accept help? Should Olivia trust Angela? Hmm…I guess you'll just have to wait and see!**_

_**Please review here, on Twitter (BensonFan711) or on Facebook (Summer Jayne).**_


	31. Chapter 31

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**Hmm…I expect you all would be a bit more suspicious of Angela, but you're not! I don't want to give anything away, so I'll leave my comments at that. Interesting theories though, that she's Olivia's guardian angel or possibly Olivia's mother.**_

**Chapter 31**

Luke was almost giddy as he turned onto I-95 towards New England. He knew, from the moment he raped her, that he would be obligated to marry Olivia, and that thought had consumed his entire being. He could train her to be the perfect wife, in spite of her adamant resistance. And, once the two were married, his soul would once again be clean, and the only way he would ever lose her again would be through death.

XxXxX

"Alex!" Olivia called into the house. "Come inside, please. It looks like its about to pour," she said to Angela. Angela crossed the threshold, but ventured no further.

"It won't rain until you're safe, but we do need to hurry," Angela explained to her.

"What's going on?" Alex said as she entered the hallway, taking notice of the woman standing in front of her. "Angela, you're back."

"You two know each other?" Olivia asked.

"In a manner of speaking. I thought you had left town for good," Alex answered.

"We can catch up on all of that later. Right now, it is imperative that you two do what you need to do," Angela spoke.

"And what exactly do we need to do?" Alex asked, narrowing her eyes.

"Angela seems to think we're in danger here," Olivia answered.

"Liv, Angela has made claims like this before. You don't know her like I do," Alex countered.

"Does the name Luke mean anything to either of you?" Angela asked. Olivia's blood ran cold and her face went pale. "Olivia, you know exactly who I'm talking about, don't you?"

"Alex, can I talk to you for a minute? Alone?" Olivia asked. Alex ushered them into the small study off the entry way and closed the door.

"I'm not going anywhere, Liv," Alex said as soon as the door was closed. "And I don't understand how you can trust someone so quickly."

"She knows things about me, Alex. Things that she shouldn't know," Olivia answered calmly.

"Isn't it just as possible that she has connections to the Prophets of Leviticus, and this is all an elaborate trap? Come on, Liv, you're the detective here! You know better than this," Alex spat back.

"You said Angela has done this before. What happened?" Olivia asked.

"She tells people they're in danger from something or another. Liv, it's a smokescreen. She's playing you," Alex answered.

"My gut tells me to trust her. What if she's right? I'm scared, Alex. I'm so scared, I can hardly sleep most nights. I felt something in her store," Olivia said softly.

"What?" Alex asked sarcastically.

"Safe," Olivia answered. Their eyes met. Olivia knew they were never going to agree on this one.

"You think I'm not scared too, Liv? I'm terrified! We left New York because of that fear, and here we are again. Back to the same arguments we had at home. I can't do this anymore, Liv," Alex exclaimed.

"Then what do you want to do?" Liv hollered back.

"I want to go home. Back to life we had before all of this started. We got up, we went to work, and at the end of the day, we came home, but we can't do that because of this damn case!" Alex yelled.

"It's just a little longer, Alex," Olivia answered.

"How much longer? How long are we going to keep running?" Alex asked.

"I don't know," Olivia said softly. "But maybe a little time apart will do us both some good." With that, she brushed past Alex and headed up the stairs. She tried to push back the tears as she repacked the suitcase she had brought with her. She checked the mirror and dabbed a tiny amount of concealer on her face to cover the tear stains before dragging the suitcase back downstairs to meet with Angela.

"I'm all set," Olivia said as she opened the door. Angela had heard the argument with Alex, though she hadn't meant to. Olivia rushed towards Angela's old Beetle, but before Angela followed, she took a small stone from her pocket, muttered a few words, and carefully buried it next to the front stoop.

"What was that for?" Olivia asked as Angela climbed into the front seat and pulled her seatbelt over her chest. Angela smiled.

"It was a piece of hematite. I left it, and I asked the Divine to keep watch over the house and protect Alex," Angela answered.

"You heard," Olivia said quietly.

"Yes," she answered. The two women sat in silence as Angela maneuvered the car back towards town.

"Would you like to talk about it?" Angela asked.

"How much do you already know?" Olivia asked.

"She is your soulmate, you know," Angela replied.

"I know," Olivia said, her voice faultering slightly.

"Sometimes, things happen that cloud us from seeing what we're meant to see. Our trust and our faith can become so eclipsed by fear that nothing makes sense anymore. Alex will be ok, but this will be a leap of faith for you. You must trust that the Divine will protect her," Angela told her.

"You sound pretty sure that something is going to happen to her," Olivia replied.

"Olivia, I'll be honest with you. I don't know what will happen, if anything, but I do know that you are both being watched over and protected. I also know that your faith is about to be tested," Angela answered as they pulled onto the alley that led back to the store. "It _will_ be ok." Olivia climbed out of the car and followed Angela into the store.

"Jenna, dear, why don't you head home for the night?" Angela suggested.

"I thought I was scheduled until 10:00," the young girl answered.

"I will pay you for the remainder of your shift, but you must go," Angela repeated. "Don't worry about the store."

"If you're sure…" Jenna said, gathering her bag from behind the counter. Angela followed Jenny to make sure that she had gotten safely to her car and was now driving away.

"Follow me." Olivia dragged her bag through a series of rooms that she hadn't realized existed. Angela extracted a key from her pocket and opened a door that led to a small apartment in the back of the store.

"This is where I stay when I'm in town," Angela explained. "The sofa pulls out into a bed. I'm sorry it isn't much, but you'll be safe here." Olivia stowed her bag in a corner of the room. It was still early, though, too early to sleep.

"I have to watch the front of the store, but you're welcome to browse or read, if you like. I'd offer use of the television, but I find the shows on today are particularly violent, so I got rid of it." That suited Olivia just fine. She didn't want to watch TV anyway, but the store intrigued her.

As Olivia wandered through the store, one particular room caught her eye. She couldn't quite discern what the theme was, but it attracted her. There were paintings and sculptures as well as several books. She noticed one in particular and picked it up. Angela had run ahead to check on a few things in the store and returned to see Olivia studying the book intently.

"Oh, _Lioness_! That's one of my favorites," she exclaimed.

"I've never heard of it," Olivia replied, opening the cover.

"It was written by a rape survivor," Angela explained. "She went through unspeakable torture, and as part of her healing process, she started writing. Before she knew it, she had a novel in her hands. Everything in this room was created by a sexual abuse survivor, actually." Olivia looked around the room. There were so many pieces.

"Someday, perhaps you'll create something to add to this room," Angela said. Olivia chuckled.

"I'm not much of an artist," she claimed.

"Neither was the author of that book, but she found a way to heal," Angela replied.

"How did you know I was raped?" Olivia asked, as realization dawned on her. She had never told Angela about what had happened to her.

"I can feel it in your energy. There's just a feeling I've learned to recognize. I can't describe it, but I know when it's there," Angela explained.

XxXxX

Alex lowered herself onto the comfortable sofa in the living room, shoulders hunched over. Where had they gone so wrong? It was as if a huge wedge had been slammed between her and Olivia, and she couldn't figure out where it had come from. They were so good together. A few months ago, she had been sure that nothing would ever rip them apart. And yet, here she was, sitting in a big empty house, longing for the brunette she had chased away. She glanced at the clock. It was late, but not terribly so. She lifted the phone from the cradle and dialed a number that had only recently become familiar.

"Hello," came the cheery voice from the other end of the line.

"Marc, it's Alex…" she began, not quite sure where to go next.

"Alex, what's wrong?" he asked, hearing the pain in her voice. Alex opened her mouth to speak, but a strangled sob was the only sound that came out. "What happened?" the reverend asked again. Once more, her voice failed. "Ok, Alex, calm down. What's happened?"

"Olivia…Liv…I think she left me," Alex said as the floodgates crumbled and the tears flowed freely from her eyes.

"Oh, Alex, I'm so sorry. What happened?" Rev. McMillan asked again. Alex told him about the argument they had had, and how it ended with Olivia storming off with Angela.

"Give her some time, Alex. She's been through hell; you know that," the reverend replied.

"I know, I know. I just thought that maybe we could fix things. I mean, we've been running pretty hot and cold since she came back, but I don't know if she'll come back this time," Alex replied.

XxXxX

Luke had finally found the town Isaiah had told him about. He tried to follow the directions he had been given, but the roads didn't quite seem to line up the way they were supposed to. It took longer than it was supposed to, but he found the road he was looking for, and soon he would find the woman he was looking for.

_**Dun, dun, DUN! Ok, so I think you can all see where this is headed. Cliffhanger, but not really. Hmm…or is it? Angela *did* leave a protective stone after all…**_

_**What do you think? Review here, on Twitter (BensonFan711) or on Facebook (Summer Jayne).**_


	32. Chapter 32

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**Ok, I've read the comments from the last chapter, and I feel the need to get a few things off of my chest. First of all, many of you have taken "sides" between Alex and Olivia, and while this is fine, and I appreciate your comments, please remember to be respectful of everyone's interpretation. This is a work of fiction, and I have done my best to keep the characters true to what they have been portrayed as on the show.**_

_**Secondly, please understand that BOTH Alex and Olivia are hurting throughout this ordeal, and they are processing it in very, very different ways. There is quite often a fracture in a relationship when a rape occurs.**_

_**And last, people have commented that Olivia is being hypocritical by talking to Elliot about religion, but snapping at Alex every time it's brought up. Remember, Elliot has been a life-long Catholic, and Olivia has always known that side of him and never felt threatened by it. Alex, on the other hand, never went to church from the time she met Olivia until Olivia was kidnapped.**_

_**Ok, stepping off my soapbox…enjoy the story!**_

**Chapter 32**

"Talk to me, Alex, what's on your mind?" Rev. McMillan said.

"I shouldn't have come back here. This is where things always fall apart," Alex said.

"Slow down, Alex, you're not making any sense," Rev. McMillan replied.

"We had reason to believe we weren't safe in New York, so Liv and I decided to come to my family's summer home on the Cape. Now, Liv ran out, and she's with the same person who tore my family apart last time," Alex spilled out.

"What happened with your family?" Rev. McMillan asked.

XxXxX

Luke pulled into the driveway and made his way down gravel driveway. Alex's Mercedes was still parked out front, and lights illuminated the windows on the first floor. Good, they were home. He parked his car and crept up to the front porch. He yanked on the second plank in on the third step, lifting it to reveal a hidden key, exactly where Isaiah said it would be. How that man knew so much about these women and this house was beyond him, but he was thankful for all of the inside information he had. Drawing the weapon from the holster on his hip, he slipped the key into the lock, twisted it to the right, and creeping silently into the house.

XxXxX

Alex heard the creak of the floorboard in the hallway as Luke tried to slink down the hall.

"Hold on a minute, Marc…I think I heard something," Alex said. She set the phone down and sidled across the living room, expecting to see Olivia. "Liv?" she called.

XxXxX

As the floorboard creaked, Luke's stomach dropped. He could barely breathe, and then he heard Alex calling for Olivia. Wait, she wasn't here? He was going to need a change in plans. And then, there she was, standing in front of him.

"Hello, Alex," Alex's eyes went wide as they centered on the firearm in his hand. She started to back into the living room. "No, no, hon, I don't think so," he said as he reached out and grabbed her arm.

"HELP ME!" she screamed. Luke pushed the gun harder into her body.

"If you don't shut up, you're going to wind up dead, is that clear?" he hissed at her.

"_Alex, are you there? Alex?"_ came the voice of Rev. McMillan from the phone. Luke lifted the phone and threw it across the room, shattering it.

"Where's Olivia?" he asked.

"Screw you!" Alex spat back.

"Ok, fine, we can do this the hard way. You're still here, which means she's gong to have to come back eventually. So, we'll just wait," Luke said, forcing Alex into a chair and binding her to it. Isaiah had ordered him not to hurt Alex, which puzzled him, but as long as Alex didn't know that, he could play on her fear and force her to comply. Besides, having her restrained already would keep her out of the way when Olivia finally did decide to show up again.

XxXxX

"Everything in the room was really created by a survivor?" Olivia asked, taking it all in again.

"Yes," Angela replied. Olivia studied the woman in front of her curiously.

"How exactly did you get involved with so many of them?" she asked.

"They find their way here, or I meet them in my travels. I'm not a therapist, by any stretch of the imagination, but I can listen to them and I can love them, just as the Divine Spirit does," she answered. Suddenly, her head snapped towards the door. Olivia furrowed her brow.

"What is it?" Olivia asked.

"Something's happened," Angela answered. "I have to go."

"Wait, what's happened?" Olivia asked.

"I can't explain it right now," Angela answered, scrambling for her bag and keys. Olivia followed her as she made a beeline to the front door.

"Angela, I don't understand," Olivia called after her. Angela whirled around to face her.

"You don't have to. Listen to me very carefully. Lock the door behind me, and whatever you do, don't leave the store, understand?" Angela asked. Her request didn't sit very well with Olivia. Olivia was the cop; she was the one trained to protect and serve.

"I'm coming with you," Olivia answered.

"No, Olivia, please. I know you want to protect me, but I can handle myself. Look into your heart. Your intuition is telling you that you are meant to stay here. Listen to it, and trust yourself," Angela said, in that same damn, soft voice that instantly put Olivia at ease.

"Fine, but if you aren't back here in an hour, I'm coming after you," Olivia stated. Angela nodded her head. It was an acceptable compromise. An hour was all Angela would need. Angela turned her head towards the door as the crisp night air enveloped her body. Olivia was staring directly at her eyes as she twisted the lock on the front door and retreated into the safety of the store. Angela threw herself into her old Beetle and jammed the gear shift into first gear, and sped off into the night. She weaved her way through the familiar town and arrived in front of the Cabots' house in minutes.

_Oh no,_ she thought upon seeing the strange car in the driveway and the front door still wide open. _I'm too late._

In the distance, she could hear sirens wailing, and mere minutes later, three police cruisers had pulled into the driveway.

"Are you all right, ma'am?" one of the officers asked, seeing the shocked look on her face.

"Yes, I just arrived, but something's wrong inside," she said frantically.

"What happened?" the officer asked.

"I don't know; I only just arrived, but there was a woman in there, Alex Cabot. Something's happened to her," Angela said.

"Can you be more specific?" he asked.

"No, I just…I have a bad feeling," Angela answered. Two officers already had weapons drawn and were entering the house.

"Drop it!" she heard a voice yell in the distance. "Drop it, now!" A shot rang out into the night.

"No!" Angela cried, lunging for the house, only to be pulled back by the same cop who was talking to her.

XxXxX

Olivia paced the length of the shop. In her gut, her most primal instinct, she knew Angela was right. Something _had_ happened, and Alex was in trouble. So why was she just sitting around here waiting for someone to deliver bad news? This wasn't who she was. Olivia Benson didn't hide when danger lurked about her. She ended it and protected others. Making up her mind, she left the store through the back door so she could lock it from the inside before letting herself out. She extracted her cell phone and called the one cab company in town.

She waited for what seemed like eternity, but eventually, she perched herself on the edge of the back seat of the cab and gave the driver the address. Nervously, she tapped her foot as visions of the most her most horrific dreams flashed in her head. As they rounded the corner, she could see the flashing lights. Before they could get to the house, an officer stopped them. Olivia leapt out of the cab, throwing some cash to the driver.

"Ma'am, ma'am, I'm sorry. We can't let you back there," he said.

"Officer, my name is Detective Olivia Benson with the NYPD. This is my girlfriend's house. Please, let me though," she said, flashing her badge, thoroughly grateful that she never left without it in her pocket. The officer studied her curiously. "Please," she asked again. He nodded and called to his partner, who escorted her the remainder of the way down the driveway. Another shot rang through the night as she felt herself being dragged protectively behind one of the cuisers.

Olivia's world seemed to stop. The sounds of the chaos faded away until she could only hear the sound of her own breath and the thumping of her own heart. Alex could be lying on the floor, bleeding or…no, she wasn't going to think about that, and the last thing she had told Alex was that she wanted time apart. _No, this isn't what I meant. I didn't want to leave her. I still don't. I love her. Oh God, I love her!_ And then she realized what she had done. She had called out to a higher power, the same higher power she blamed for what she had suffered.

_**And things just got worse. Keep reading, I assure you, there is a reason for everything, and many, many more secrets to be revealed, such as Angela's connection to Alex, who Isaiah is, and oh yeah, who died inside the house! (Yes, someone did die).**_

_**Review here, on Twitter (BensonFan711) or Facebook (Summer Jayne).**_


	33. Chapter 33

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**Thank you again for all of your wonderful comments. I promise, some of your questions will be answered in this chapter!**_

**Chapter 33**

Angela noticed Olivia's arrival on the scene, and as soon as she could, she broke away from the officer's grasp and rushed over to Olivia.

"It's ok, Olivia," she soothed, reaching out to touch the brunette's shoulder.

"No, it's not," Olivia answered, her voice cracking.

"Alex is ok," Angela answered.

"What if she's not? What if those shots were aimed at her? She could be…I can't do this. I can't deal with this, not without her. I _need _her," Olivia said.

"Olivia, she's fine," Angela answered. Olivia looked towards the door. A uniformed officer was standing in the doorway, giving the all clear signal.

"Come on," Angela said, dragging Olivia from the ground.

"Call a bus!" the officer yelled. _Oh, God, _Olivia thought, _please no. Please, please no._ She raced up to the doorway with Angela hot on her heels.

"I'm sorry, ma'am. I can't let you in there just yet," the officer explained as he took Olivia by the forearms.

"My girlfriend's in there," Olivia said, breaking free of his grasp and barreling in the front door.

"Alex!" she called frantically. The only light in the house was coming from the living room. She rounded the corner. The first image to greet her was that of Luke's dead body, sprawled on the floor, with a second officer leaning over him, checking his vital signs.

"Liv," Alex said weakly, causing Olivia to turn her in the direction of her name. Alex was still bound to the chair, blood pouring from her right shoulder. Olivia immediately rushed to her side, pressing one hand against the wound to apply pressure. With the other, she undid the ropes restraining Alex.

"You came back," Alex said softly, taking in the features of her girlfriend's face as if she was seeing it for the first time.

"Of course, I came back, Love," Olivia answered as her hand grew red with the stain of Alex's blood. As soon as her second had was finished with its task, she used it to apply additional pressure to the wound. Alex's normally pale skin had grown even whiter.

"I love you, Liv," Alex said, her voice still weak.

"I know, honey, and I love you, too," Olivia answered. There was so much she wanted, no, needed to say to Alex, but right now, the simple statement of love was all that was necessary. Alex's eyes drifted to close, and it seemed to take longer than normal for them to open again. "No, no, Alex. Stay with me. Come on, stay with me, honey," Olivia said.

"Liv, I'm so sleepy," Alex said, slurring her words slightly. She was losing far too much blood.

"Here," Angela said, seemingly from nowhere. She had retrieved a first aid kit, and extracted a gauze pad, which Olivia hurried to apply to Alex's shoulder. Angela rounded the chair and placed her hands lightly on Alex's shoulders. She closed her eyes and appeared to be in a state of deep concentration.

"What is she doing?" Alex asked. Olivia knew whatever it was would help Alex. She wasn't sure where that thought had come from, only that it had entered her mind, and she knew it to be true. Minutes ticked by. Where was that damn ambulance? Alex seemed more alert now, and the bleeding was finally slowing.

"Ma,am, please, allow us," came a male voice from behind Olivia. She turned around, and behind her was a young man in a paramedic uniform. She allowed him to take her place in order to assess Alex's wound. Olivia stood back, holding her bloodstained hands in front of her.

"Will she be ok?" she asked.

"We need to get her to the hospital. You're welcome to ride along with us," the paramedic said.

"Go, Olivia. I'll meet you there," Angela replied. Normally this would have felt like an intrusion, but Olivia was glad she had offered. It continued to baffle her how Angela seemed to be able to sense her needs and wants before she even knew she had them. As she turned to nod to Angela, she noticed that the woman seemed to be surrounded by a white light. No, that was impossible. People didn't emit light. But there it was, encompassing her entire being. Olivia blinked, and the vision disappeared. Angela was just as normal as always.

Once Alex was secure on the stretcher, she was wheeled out to the front of the house. She grabbed Olivia's hand in a death grip.

"Don't leave me," she whispered. "Don't leave me again."

"I'm right here, Alex. You're going to be fine," Olivia replied. She had spoken those words so many times before to victims, but she never quite believed them. They were always more for reassurance than anything else, but this time, the normal anxiety and fear she usually experienced had vanished. An unusual calm had settled over her, and she knew, absolutely without a doubt, that Alex would be fine.

The ride to the hospital was chaotic. The paramedic worked skillfully, hooking Alex up to monitors and doing what he could to treat her in the field, even as the ambulance bumped along the country roads towards its final destination. Olivia fixes her eyes on the blonde's face the entire time, trying to keep herself out of the way. When they arrived at the hospital, Alex was whisked into the emergency room, while Olivia was shown to the waiting room. She was still staring at the large double doors Alex had disappeared through when Angela arrived.

"How are you doing?" she asked.

"I'm ok," Olivia answered truthfully.

"Let's get you cleaned up," Angela replied. Olivia looked down at her hand which were dark brown where Alex's blood had caked on them. She allowed Angela to lead her into the ladies' room, where crystal clear water flowed crimson as Alex's essence was washed from her hands. Red swirls circled the drain and finally disappeared as the last traces were removed. Olivia patted her hands dry with a paper towel and returned to the waiting room. She sat on one of the beige vinyl chairs while Angela took one of her hands in both of her own.

"How did you know?" Olivia asked. Angela chuckled.

"You wouldn't like my answer if I told you," she replied.

"Try me," Olivia answered.

"Prayer," Angela answered simply. Olivia felt her toes curl and her jaw clench. It seemed like no matter where she turned she was surrounded by all things religious, in spite of her desire to escape it. She jerked her hand away from Angela.

"That's absurd," Olivia answered.

"I told you you wouldn't like it. Olivia, God, the God and Goddess, Buddha, Allah…whatever you want to call the Divine Spirit, exists. That's why I'm here, why you are here. You've lost your faith," Angela stated. Olivia scooted farther away from her.

"You're one of them, aren't you? One of the Prophets of Leviticus?" Olivia asked. Angela sighed.

"No. The Prophets of Leviticus are an example of what happens when religious texts are misinterpreted. I know of their work all too well, and it saddens me. They have forgotten the fundamental principle that is at the absolute core of the Bible," Angela explained.

"Oh, and what exactly is that?" Olivia asked, anger bubbling to the surface.

"God is love," Angela answered.

"I've certainly never felt love from any form of religion," Olivia spat back.

"I never said God was religion, Olivia. I said God is love. There's a big difference. You are loved, so dearly by Him. We all are," Angela answered.

"Then why do all of his so-called followers hate me? Why do they hate Alex?" Olivia asked.

"Because they don't understand. Years ago, it was forbidden for a white man to love a black woman. They finally realized that the heart doesn't see color; it only sees the soul. Why they would think that the heart can see gender is beyond me. God has brought the two of you together, and no human can tell you who to love or which souls have been placed on this earth to find each other. To do so is to play God," Angela explained.

"By your logic, we should give a free pass to pedophiles, then," Olivia countered. As soon as the words left her mouth, she realized that she had condemned her own relationship by providing a counter argument.

"Olivia, you know that's not true. Pedophiles are attracted to the physical features of a child. The age, the innocence, the lack of development. That's what they see. They don't fall in love with the soul of another human being. But two adults – male or female – can fall in love with another soul. Do not judge all believers on the basis of what a few fundamentalists have done to you, no matter how horrible or painful it was," Angela answered.

"They raped me," Olivia said quietly.

"I know," Angela said. "And God has heard your cries and your suffering, and he has seen the purity in your heart."

"The where is He?" Olivia asked.

"He's right here," Angela replied. "Always."

"Ms. Benson?" a nurse asked, interrupting the two women.

"Yes?" Olivia answered, standing.

"The doctor is with Alex. She's asking for you," the nurse answered as she led Olivia down the hallway.

"Olivia!" Alex exclaimed upon seeing her face. She was propped up in the hospital bed with her arm in a sling. Olivia couldn't fight the genuine smile that invaded her face. She leaned over and placed a kiss on her girlfriend's cheek.

"How is she, Doctor?" Olivia asked the redheaded woman in the room, dressed in scrubs and a white lab coat.

"She's lucky. Her blood count was dangerously low when she came in, and I thought we might have to do surgery. A blood count that low would normally indicate that the brachial artery, which is the major artery that flows down the arm, had been damaged. However, when I examined her, her major blood vessels seemed to be in tact, and the bullet missed all of her major nerves. She'll be in some pain for a while, and I'll give her something for that, but other than that, she's fine," the doctor answered.

"When do you think she can come home?" Olivia asked.

"As soon as I get the prescription written and her discharge papers are drawn up," the doctor answered.

"So soon?" Olivia asked as shocked etched her face.

"There's no good reason for her to stay here. Her case is another medical miracle," the doctor answered.

_Miracle…He's right here…Always…He's heard your cries and suffering…_

Olivia looked back at Alex, as her thoughts fired through her brain. Alex had been ripped from the claws of death, by what was apparently a miracle. Was there really a God? If it hadn't slapped Olivia across the face, she would never have believed it, but as Alex's blue eyes gazed lovingly up at her, with the twinkle and warmth they had always held when they sought out Olivia, she could see it right in front of her. Within the depths of those crystal blue eyes, she could see the light of God. And that terrified her.

_**Did you REALLY think I would kill Alex? Hahaha…Never! But, there are still many more secrets to be revealed. And to quote my favorite movie, "all in good time, my little pretty, all in good time." (Yes, I love the Wizard of Oz!)**_

_**Review here, on Twitter (BensonFan711) or Facebook (Summer Jayne).**_


	34. Chapter 34

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**Thank you again for all of your wonderful comments. I have no idea how much longer this is going to be. My characters seem to have quite a lot to say in this story! Love it!**_

**Chapter 34**

Olivia quickly excused herself and ran back out into the hospital waiting room. Angela had disappeared. She walked over to the nurse's station.

"Excuse me, the woman that was here with me, did she happen to say where she went?" Olivia asked.

"I'm sorry, she didn't. But she left this for you," the nurse said, handing Olivia a note.

_Olivia,_

_I'm sorry I had to leave so abruptly. I have other matters to attend to. Right now, your place is with Alex, but please, stop by the store if you wish to talk further._

_Angela_

Olivia stared at the note. Angela was right; her place _was_ by Alex's side. She turned towards the emergency room once more, lifted her head, and confidently strode back to Alex's side. The note had been carefully folded and was now resting in Olivia's back pocket.

The hospital had arranged transportation for both Olivia and Alex to return home. The police were still there, but Olivia suspected they would finish up soon. She helped Alex up the stairs and tucked her into bed. The pain medication she had been given at the hospital was making her drowsy, and she wanted nothing more than to sleep. Once Alex was settled, Olivia headed back downstairs to talk to the detectives.

"Any idea what happened?" she asked the tall, burly man carefully examining the front door.

"Ma'am, you really shouldn't be here," he said.

"I'm sorry, we haven't met yet. I'm Detective Olivia Benson with the NYPD. This house belongs to my girlfriend's family," she said, one more flashing her gold shield. The man extended a hand to her.

"Detective Derek Broward, Barnstable County Sheriff's Office," he said. His demeanor changed completely once he realized he was talking to a fellow cop. He turned back to the door, showing his findings to Olivia. "There's no sign of forced entry. Do you know if there was a key hidden anywhere on the premises?"

"Actually, there is," Olivia said, leading him out side. She went to the step with the loose board and pulled it up. The compartment underneath was empty. "I think that answers the question of how he got in here. Have you IDed the perp yet?"

"There was no ID on the body, only this," Detective Broward replied, holding up a clear evidence bag containing the same prayer card that had been found on other members of the Prophets of Leviticus.

"He goes by the name of Luke. I'm sure it's an alias. He's a member of a cult group called the Prophets of Leviticus. My squad in Manhattan has had a few dealings with them already, and there is an active investigation underway," she said. She pulled out a card from her pocket and handed it to the detective. "Detective Elliot Stabler. He's my partner, and he's the lead detective on the investigation. Give him a call, and I'm sure he'll assist you in any way he can."

"Detective Benson, this seems to be a personal vendetta, then," Detective Broward said. _You have no idea just how personal this is,_ Olivia thought. The verse on the prayer card continued to haunt her.

**If a man is caught in the act of raping a young woman who is not engaged, he must pay fifty pieces of silver to her father. Then he must marry the young woman because he violated her, and he will never be allowed to divorce her. Deuteronomy, 22:28-29**

The pieced started to fall together for Olivia. Luke was hunting her down because of a Bible verse. She thought all of that stuff about him wanting to marry her were to intimidate her, but no, it was his guilty conscience. She realized that she wasn't completely sure what the ground rules were at the hospital where she was held. Was it possible that they weren't supposed to rape their captives? Or at least, not rape them unless they intended to marry them? And what about the first part of the verse? She shook her head as she realized there were still missing fragments of information for her. She needed to talk to Elliot, as soon as possible. But first, there was someone else she needed to see.

She grabbed Alex's keys and headed out the door. She pulled into the small parking lot of the store that was becoming so strangely familiar to her. She practically ran to the door and threw it open, only to be greeted by Jenna behind the counter.

"Hi! Can I help you with something?" she asked sweetly when she saw Olivia looking around.

"Is Angela in?" Olivia asked.

"She is, but she asked not to be disturbed. She should be free later, though," Jenna replied. Olivia leaned her elbows on the counter and buried her face in her hands. "Are you sure there isn't anything I can do in the meantime?"

"No, it's just…it's urgent," Olivia said. She started to turn back towards the door.

"Wait!" Jenna called, not realizing what she had done. Olivia turned back towards her. "Forgive me for asking, but you're having a bit of a spiritual crisis right now, aren't you?"

"It's really something I'd rather discuss with Angela," Olivia said, not wanting to allow yet another stranger into her personal life.

"Hold on for a minute. I'll see what I can do," Jenna answered, disappearing into one of the back rooms.

"Olivia, I knew you'd be back, but honestly, I didn't expect you so soon," Angela said. "Come, let's talk." Angela motioned to Olivia to follow her into the comfortable gallery that held so many pieces created by survivors.

"Thank you, Jenna," Olivia said before she disappeared. Angela settled into one of the couches while Olivia perched on the other end of the sofa. She had wanted so badly to talk to Angela, but now that she was here, she wasn't quite sure where to begin. It was then that a fixture caught her eye. There was an ornate statue of a woman with six arms seated in the center of a fountain. There were several tiers for the water to flow, creating a soothing, gentle sound that filled the room. Between the pools of water was a lovely arrangement of flowers of all different types and colors. The more Olivia stared at it, the more detail she saw in it. It really was an exquisite piece. Angela followed Olivia's gaze to the fountain.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Angela asked softly.

"Yes, it is. It's almost hypnotic, in a way. I feel like I could just sit here and stare at it for hours," Olivia replied.

"The statue is a representation of the Hindu goddess, Kali. She's the protectress of women. Somehow, it seemed fitting to place a shrine to her in this room," Angela stated.

"There you go again, with the religious stuff. How do you know all of this?" Olivia asked.

"I don't," Angela answered honestly. "But, I've seen far too many things to believe that God, to use the term loosely, doesn't exist. I told you before, Olivia, God is love."

"Yes, you mentioned that. I guess when you've seen what I've seen, it's hard to believe that someone who has the power to change it all wouldn't," Olivia replied.

"God doesn't hurt us, people do. But Olivia, how many officers have you seen dodge that fatal bullet? How many victims have pulled through against medical odds? How many frightened people have found the courage to face their attackers and seek justice? If there isn't a God, where does that kind of healing and strength come from?" Angela asked.

"Isn't it equally possible that those are lucky breaks and coincidences? And as far as inner strength goes, couldn't we have had that all along?" Olivia countered.

"I suppose so. But I also know that there is something completely indescribable and undeniable when God makes His presence known," Angela said. "You aren't so sure now, are you? What are you seeking, Olivia?" Tears welled in Olivia's eyes as she looked into the depths of Angela's violet ones. There was something so calm, so loving in them. It was different from what she saw in Alex's. The look from Alex was just for her, but this was the way Angela looked at everyone.

"I don't know," Olivia whispered. Angela smiled.

"Then you've found your direction. Open your mind to accepting things you cannot see or understand. You'll find it, in time. Oh, and give my regards to Marc," Angela said.

"Who?" Olivia replied, confused.

"Rev. Marc McMillan, the minister of the Westside Presbyterian Church. He's been doing a wonderful job helping Alex grapple with her spirituality, and he has a genuine and pure heart," Angela answered.

"Now, how did you know all of that?" Olivia asked. Angela shrugged.

"Who do you think called the police?" Angela asked.

_**More to come, definitely. More secrets to be revealed, and maybe some AO fluff/smut. Stick around, everything you think you knew about this story is about to change!**_

_**Review here, on Twitter (BensonFan711) or Facebook (Summer Jayne).**_


	35. Chapter 35

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**Finally, a much lighter chapter. Enjoy!**_

**Chapter 35**

Olivia drove home with her mind replaying the entire conversation she had with Angela. Logically, she was finding it very difficult to believe that a supreme being could allow all of the horrors she had seen both personally and professionally, but at the same time, Alex had been spared. Was it really an act of God or just another lucky break? Then again, how many lucky breaks could she witness and still continue to believe that it was mere coincidence?

By the time she returned to the house, the police had finished their investigation. The body had been removed from the living room, and even though the place was a mess, it no longer bore the label of "crime scene." She crept back up the stairs to check on Alex. When she opened the bedroom door, she found the blonde curled on her side, resting peacefully with Olivia's pillow wrapped tightly in her arms. Her cheek nuzzled the soft surface and her blonde hair spread around her like a halo. She started to stir, and Olivia froze, not wanting to disturb her. Alex's eyes fluttered and opened, and her face broke into a smile when she saw the brunette staring back at her.

"You're here," Alex said.

"Go back to sleep, honey. I didn't mean to wake you," Olivia said. Alex started to sit up in bed, and hissed as a bolt of pain shot through her injured shoulder. Olivia rushed to her side to help her up. "Easy, hon. That shoulder's going to take a little while to heal."

"What happened?" Alex asked, still groggy from the pain medication.

"You were shot," Olivia said softly. Alex's eyes darted around as she began to remember the events of the previous night.

"You left," she whispered. "I didn't think you were coming back." Olivia sat on the vacant side of the bed and pulled Alex into her arms.

"I know. I never intended for you to get hurt," Olivia replied. Alex rested her head on Olivia's chest. She could feel Olivia's heart beating, strong and proud from deep within her chest. She relaxed into the gentle rhythm that was created by the rise and fall of the brunette's chest, curling her finger's around Olivia's forearm. She felt safe here. Safe and loved.

"Please don't leave me again," Alex whispered. "I've lost so many people I've loved; I don't want to lose you, too."

"You won't lose me, Alex. I love you far too much to let you go," Olivia replied.

"I thought my dad did, too, and I lost him," she blurted out.

"What do you mean?" Olivia asked. "I thought your father still lived on Park Ave."

"He does, but we had a huge argument when I was in law school, and he said he never wanted to see me again. I've tried to call or write several times over the years. The mail always gets returned, and the phone calls always go unanswered," Alex replied.

"What was the fight about?" Olivia asked. She knew that Alex never spoke to her father, but Alex had always been secretive as to what exactly their issues were.

"It's not important," Alex said, wiping a tear from her cheek. "The only thing that matters is that he stopped loving me, and if he could do that, anyone could."

"I'm not going anywhere," Olivia whispered. "And I was serious about what we talked about before all of this happened. I want to raise a child with you." Alex sat up and looked Olivia dead in the eyes.

"Are you…are you asking me to marry you?" she asked. Olivia dropped her head and looked at her lap. She toyed with a loose thread on her jeans.

_She is your soulmate, you know._

Finally, after looking at everything else in the room, Olivia focused back on Alex's face.

"Well, this isn't exactly the way I imagined asking you. I thought there would be dinner involved, a bottle of wine, and a ring, but…" Alex lunged at Olivia, crashing her lips onto the brunette's, catching her completely off guard. Her good arm snaked around the brunette's waist, pulling her close. Olivia returned the kiss, just as feverishly, trying to channel all of her love for Alex through her lips and into the blonde's. She pulled back, short of breath. "I assume that's a yes?" Olivia asked. Alex giggled and nodded her head.

"Yes, yes, a thousand times yes," Alex replied. Olivia leaned in and placed a series of feather light kisses along Alex's jaw line.

"We'll go ring shopping when we get back to the city," she whispered in Alex's ear.

"Liv, I don't need a ring. All I need is you," Alex replied. Olivia grinned and kissed a particularly sensitive spot on Alex's neck. The blonde rewarded her with a moan. Olivia carefully leaned Alex back, taking great care to avoid jarring her and sending more pain through her body. Olivia's fingers grazed Alex's side, running from her hip up to her hair, where it settled, taking in her silky tresses. A shiver ran through Alex's body.

Olivia kissed Alex again tenderly, and for a brief moment, it felt exactly like it did in the beginning of their relationship. Neither woman was holding back; it was perfection. Olivia's hand slipped under the hem of Alex's cotton camisole and settled on her breast. She teased the swollen flesh until the nipple came to a tight peak. Her mouth moved from Alex's, down the long, creamy neck and replaced her fingers. Alex twisted her fingers in Olivia's hair, drawing her closer to her body. The blonde's good arm reached around to grab the detective's ass, causing Olivia to yelp in surprise. Alex's hand found the hem of Olivia's shirt, and she tried to tug it over the detective's head. Olivia was only too happy to assist her with her task. Momentarily succumbing to the delicious sensations that were flowing through her body, Alex flipped them so that she was now on top of Olivia. The movement sent another jolt of pain through her injured shoulder, and she cried out.

"Are you sure you're up for this?" Olivia asked, taking a moment to rub the blonde's arms.

"You have no idea how ready for this I am," Alex responded huskily. Olivia ran a hand inside the waistband of Alex's cotton pajama pants and sought out the juncture between her legs. A grin crept across her face when she found a copious amount of moisture there.

"I guess you are ready for this," Olivia said, still grinning. She played along the blonde's slit, circling, but never touching her clit. Alex wiggled her good hand between Olivia and the mattress and pinched the closure on the brunette's bra, effectively releasing the clasp. She ripped the garment from Olivia's chest and tossed it aside, liking her lips at the sight of Olivia's full, perfect breasts. Olivia took advantage of Alex's stillness to pull her pants and panties from her body, leaving a completely naked blonde on top of her. Her fingers returned to their previous task between Alex's legs, while the other hand began an exploration of her body.

Alex bent over to kiss at Olivia's neck, tracing her way down to Olivia's breasts, which had always been particularly sensitive. Olivia moaned as her body responded to Alex's caresses. Everything Alex did to her made her feel so damn good. Alex's breath was coming in gasps now. It wouldn't take much more teasing for her to…

"Oh, God! Olivia!" she screamed, as waves of pleasure rolled through her body. A satisfied smirk slithered across Olivia's face, the way it always did when she heard Alex cry out her name in ecstasy. But Alex wasn't finished yet. Her hands found the waistband of Olivia's jeans and quickly divested the brunette of the rest of her clothing. Her head continued to move lower until she found what she was seeking. Alex expertly lapped at Olivia's folds, savoring her unique flavor until the brunette was moaning almost uncontrollably. Alex's lips sought out Olivia's clit and expertly teased and massaged it until Olivia exploded. Olivia panted as her mind returned to earth. Alex slipped next to her and held her close.

"Liv?" she asked in the darkness.

"Yeah?" Olivia responded.

"Do you realize that was the first time we've made love since the break-in?" Alex asked. Olivia realized she was right. Although they had tried, Olivia always had a flashback or something had gone wrong. This time, they had been so wrapped up in each other that she had completely forgotten about it.

"It was, wasn't it?" Olivia answered.

"I'm sorry," Alex whispered.

"For what, honey?" Olivia asked.

"For scaring you. I should have realized that the whole church-thing would freak you out, and instead, I just rubbed it in your face," Alex answered.

"You didn't rub it in my face. You were trying to cope, and I'm sorry I was such a bitch about it. Honestly, I don't know what I would have done if you had been the one kidnapped instead of me," Olivia confessed.

"Where do we go from here?" Alex asked.

"I think we're both going to have to figure out where we want to be spiritually, and we're going to have to respect each other's decisions," Olivia answered.

"I think I can handle that," Alex replied.

"As long as you don't go getting so half-cocked idea that homosexuality is a mortal sin, I think we'll be ok," Olivia joked. Alex chuckled.

"Somehow, I don't think that's going to happen," she answered. The two women drifted off to sleep, each deep in her own thoughts about her spirituality eclipsed by the love and completeness for the woman next to her.

_**Oh, there's still more story to tell. We still have a case to wrap up! And more secrets to uncover. So, has anyone figured out who Isaiah is yet?**_

_**Review here, on Twitter (BensonFan711) or Facebook (Summer Jayne).**_


	36. Chapter 36

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**This chapter is presented with special thanks to Saavik55 for being a sounding board. I have had the worst case of writer's block, but I think my muse is back again. Enjoy!**_

**Chapter 36**

Alex was sprawled on her back and snoring slightly when Olivia woke the next morning. As Olivia gazed at the blonde woman sleeping peacefully next to her, she suddenly decided she wanted to do something special for Alex. If there was one thing they both loved about being up at the Cape, it was the easy access to the freshest seafood available. Olivia decided she was going to prepare some sort of seafood dinner for Alex, but in order to do that, she would need to head into town to get the best catch of the day. She kissed her lover gently on the forehead, quietly showered and dressed, and headed into town.

She took her time walking down the streets, savoring the smell of the salty sea air. Alex was right; Olivia always felt more relaxed up here than she did in New York. Alex was going to be her wife. Her _wife._ She had no idea what she had done to deserve this woman's hand, but she was thankful for the blessing all the same. She pulled open the door to Murphy's Fishmarket, and was greeted by a friendly young man who couldn't have been any older than eighteen.

"Good morning!" he called pleasantly. "What can I get for you today, ma'am?"

"That depends. What did you bring in the morning?" Olivia asked.

"We pulled in some halibut this morning, and we had a pretty good lobster catch, too," he replied. Lobster. That was Alex's absolute favorite food.

"I think I'll take your two best lobsters," Olivia told him. She waited while the young man plucked the swimming creatures from the tank, packaged them, and rang in her order.

"Special occasion?" he asked.

"Yes, actually. I'm celebrating an engagement," she answered.

"Congratulations!" he said.

"Thank you," she replied, taking the bag and leaving the store. She paused to drop the bag in the car, and on an impulse, headed over to Crossroads to visit Angela.

"Olivia! What brings you by here today?" Angela asked, looking up from the counter.

"I have news," Olivia said, grinning.

"Oh? What's that?" Angela asked.

"Alex and I are getting married," Olivia said. Angela stepped out from behind the counter to embrace the brunette.

"Congratulations. I was wondering when the two of you were going to make it official," Angela answered. "I suppose you'll be heading back to New York soon," Angela added, turning towards a display and rearranging a few figurines.

"We haven't discussed when we're heading back, but yes, I suppose so. With Luke dead, there's really no reason for us to keep hiding here," Olivia answered.

"Don't be so sure. There are still threats to both of you out there," Angela said. Olivia's eyes went wide. Angela turned back to her and smiled. "Don't read too much into that statement, Olivia. If you are ready to head back, then go back, but whatever you do, take care of yourself."

"What do you mean?" Olivia asked, furrowing her brow.

"You're going to need help, Olivia. Real help. You're running away from all of your demons, hoping that they'll just drown in the ocean. It doesn't work that way, though. Eventually, they catch up to you," Angela replied.

"You mean the rape," Olivia said.

"If that's how you interpret it, then yes, that's what I'm referring to," Angela answered.

"I can't," Olivia said quietly.

"You aren't ready yet. You will be, though. For the time being, you need to find a way to channel your emotions. Otherwise, they will overpower you to the point where you feel like you're drowning," Angela said.

"How do I do that?" Olivia asked.

"You're not going to like the answer," Angela said with a small chuckle.

"Try me," Olivia challenged.

"Pray," Angela said, matter-of-factly. Olivia recoiled. "You don't have to get on your knees and whisper to some deity you may or may not believe in. Come with me." Olivia followed Angela into the small apartment in the back of the store. Angel pulled out a couple of canvasses, paints, brushes, and a palette from a large closet.

"You strike me as a painter. Here, take these, and make…whatever feels right to you. The point is, though, get involved in the piece emotionally. Don't try to duplicate something realistic, unless that's what you feel. It's not meant to be frustrating, but soothing," Angela instructed her. "I promise you, God understands emotions, and creative expressions are the clearest way to communicate with Him, or Her, if you prefer. Use the canvas to communicate your anger, fear, resentment, whatever you need to get out, but Olivia, get it out."

"This really works?" Olivia asked skeptically. The truth of the matter was that Olivia did need to express herself in some way; she just wasn't sure how to do it. She never considered herself much of an artist, but Angela had been right about everything so far.

"Sometimes it takes a few tries to get the perfect medium, but yes, it does work, and the proof is in the gallery behind you. Just try it. What do you have to lose?" Angela said, still smiling. Olivia stared at the objects in her hands.

"I don't know what to say," she said softly.

"Then say nothing. But try it," Angela replied. Olivia turned and made her way to the front of the store. She put her hand on the door, then turned to ask Angela one more question.

"Angela," Olivia began. "What happened between you and Alex?" The smile disappeared from Angela's face.

"That's her story to tell," Angela replied.

"All she said was that you were responsible for ripping her family apart. What did she mean by that?" Olivia pressed.

"I'm sorry, Olivia. I know you want answers. But for that question, you will have to let Alex tell you in her own time," Angela replied. Olivia knew by this point that it was useless to get anything out of her, so she shook her head and drove back home. By the time she got there, Alex was awake and puttering around the kitchen.

"Hey, you're up early," Alex said before kissing Olivia lightly.

"Yeah, I picked up something special for dinner tonight," Olivia said, holding up the plain brown paper bag. Alex studied it intently and noticed the slight movement inside.

"Are those…lobsters?" she asked, practically giddy. Olivia nodded. "Oh, honey, thank you!" Alex exclaimed, throwing her good arm around Olivia to hug her.

"I told you I imagined a nice dinner and a bottle of wine with that proposal, and I'm going to make good on that promise. As for the ring…" Olivia said.

"I told you I didn't care about the ring," Alex said, cutting her off.

"I know, but I'm still going to get you one anyway," Olivia answered.

"You are so stubborn," Alex said, kissing Olivia again.

"Yeah, but you love that about me," Olivia answered back.

"Sometimes," Alex kidded back.

"Sometimes?" Olivia asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I love you, Olivia Benson," Alex answered.

"Good answer," Olivia replied, chuckling. "I love you too, Alex." Olivia stored the lobsters for later on and retreated onto the screened in porch overlooking the ocean. She brought a canvas with her, along with the paints and brushes. She set the canvas on the floor and spread her legs around it, much like a child coloring in a coloring book. She squeezed a couple of the blues and greens onto the palette and dipped her brush into the darkest blue.

_Get involved in the piece emotionally, _she heard Angela's voice echo in her head. She started with broad strokes, not really sure what she was going for. Dark colors began to fill the canvas. She changed to some of the more medium tones and shortened her strokes. She thought of Luke and Isaiah and all of what she had endured at their hands. Her hand started to shake, but she kept going. She tried to take all of that pain and hatred and send it through the brush onto the canvas in front of her. Her eyes started to well with tears, and one of them fell, splashing at the paint. Tear after tear, rolled down her cheeks and onto the canvas, leaving very prominent marks on her creation. Still, she kept going. She covered the canvas in paint, and still, she couldn't stop. She applied layer after layer of color as wave after wave of sadness rolled over her. Finally, she dropped her tools, buried her head in her hands and cried.

"God, I don't know if you can hear me, of if you're even there, but I need help," she began, softly. "I need to feel whole and complete again. I want to be a wife to Alex, and I want to be everything she deserves, but I can't do this alone. Help me, please," she whispered, hoping that someone, _anyone_ would hear her. What she didn't realize was that standing in the doorway behind her was her future wife, and she had overheard every single word.

_**So, what do you think? Remember to leave a review, either here or on Twitter (BensonFan711)**_

_**Coming up next…well, now, what would be the fun in that? We still have the secret between Alex and Angela to explore, Isaiah's identity, and a few other twists and turns in store. More soon, I promise!**_


	37. Chapter 37

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**Oh, direction is a beautiful, beautiful thing. Thanks for all of your reviews, and I'm glad so many of you are still reading!**_

**Chapter 37**

Alex debated whether or not to say anything to Olivia. She was keenly aware that she had just witnessed an extremely private moment, and her place in the situation was questionable. She knew Olivia was hurting, and she wanted desperately to help her, but unless Olivia was truly ready to accept help, she would never benefit from it. She turned from the doorway and slipped back into the house, as quietly as she had arrived without saying a word. When she had retreated into the study, she pulled out her cell phone and flipped through her contact list.

"Hello?" came the friendly voice she had been seeking.

"George, hi. It's Alex," she began.

"Alex! I heard about everything that happened with you and Olivia. Are you two ok?" he asked. Alex had a great deal of respect for George Huang. He had an uncanny ability to get into the mind of just about anyone. He understood motivation, and he could scrutinize actions to pull together an accurate picture of whoever they were looking for. And yet, there was the softer side to him; the one that led cops to trust him with their own demons.

"Physically, yes, we're both fine," Alex answered carefully.

"Something tells me this isn't a social call," George answered. Alex sighed.

"I'm worried about Olivia," she confessed.

"What's going on?" he asked.

"How much do you know?" Alex asked, unsure who knew what details at this point.

"I know that there was a break-in at your apartment, and Olivia was kidnapped. She was rescued as a result of Elliot's most recent undercover mission, but other than that, nothing," he said.

"It's worse than that, George. She was…I don't even know how to describe it," Alex told him.

"Talk to me like a prosecutor, then," George suggested. Alex immediately flipped into lawyer mode, trying to forget that the victim she was describing was Olivia.

"They held her for several weeks. During that time, she was raped and tortured repeatedly, and when she finally escaped, they nearly killed her," Alex spilled out. George took a deep breath.

"She needs help," he said softly. "And so do you."

"Never mind about me, it's her I'm worried about. I'll be fine. But there's more," Alex said. "They targeted us because we're lesbians. The whole point of everything she went through was for them to convince her that she can 'choose' to be straight."

"Let me guess, some sort of absurd Biblical reason?" George speculated. Alex rolled her eyes.

"Of course. Anyway, I was wondering if you'd talk to her. We're out of town for the moment, but we should be heading back to New York in a few days," Alex asked.

"I can try, Alex, but if she's not ready to accept help, then there isn't much I can do for her. I'd also like to talk to you. Whether you know it or not, this tragedy has impacted you," he insisted. Alex bit her bottom lip. He was right. She had been trying so hard to hold herself together, she hadn't realized just how much she needed to talk to someone, too.

"Done. I'll call you when we get back," she said, hanging up the phone at his acknowledgement. She headed back to the porch, where Olivia had composed herself and was laying out her painting to dry.

"Hey," Alex said, plastering on a smile. "I didn't know you painted." Olivia gave a slight chuckle.

"Neither did I. You know, this is really bad," she said, studying the canvas in front of her. "But I kind of like it."

"I think it's wonderful," Alex said. "What's it called?"

"Called?" Olivia asked.

"Sure, every painting needs a title," Alex answered. Olivia studied her work. She thought of all of the words she associated with the colors. Cold. Detached. Abandoned. Then she turned her mind towards the emotions she had felt creating the piece. Sadness. Anger. Helplessness. Fear. And then she had it.

"Drowning in Ice," Olivia said decidedly.

"Wow. That's…deep," Alex commented. Olivia shrugged.

"It's just something I'm playing around with. The painting, I mean," she answered.

"Where did all of this stuff come from?" Alex asked.

"Oh, um, Angela gave it to me. She thought I could use it," Olivia answered. It would have been so easy to lie and say that she had stopped at a craft store and picked up the supplies, but now, more than ever, Olivia wanted to know what Alex's deal with Angela was. It was a mystery, and detectives don't like mysteries they can't solve.

"I wish that woman would just get out of my life," Alex muttered.

"What was that?" Olivia asked.

"Nothing, Olivia. Don't worry about it; it doesn't concern you," Alex warned her.

"If it concerns you, then it concerns me. Please, tell me what happened. Were you two involved in some sort of crime or something?" she asked. She was flipping into her interrogation mode. She was going to get Alex to confess, one way or another.

"No! Would you just drop it? Please?" Alex begged.

"I can't do that. Somehow, she's managed to find a way into our lives, and my gut tells me I can trust her. But then, I know that you don't, and I can't figure out why. Please, Alex, tell me what happened," Olivia said.

"Don't you see? I can't!" Alex cried.

"Yes, you can. You said she ripped your family apart. How did she do that, Alex?" Olivia asked, in that damn soft tone of hers.

"She killed my mom!" Alex cried, tears threatening to escape her eyes.

"Alex, that doesn't make sense. Your mom died in a car accident a few years ago," Olivia said, keeping her voice steady. Alex took a deep breath and lowered herself onto the sofa. Olivia took a seat beside her and placed a hand on the blonde's knee.

"My parents were on their way up here for a long weekend. It was late, and they were minutes away from the house. Out of nowhere a car collided with theirs. My dad walked away with a few cracked ribs and other minor injuries, but Mom…" Alex choked up. "We were finally talking again, you know?" Olivia nodded, and allowed Alex to continue her story. "I gave her hell when I was a teenager, but after I left home to go to college, we started to get along really, really well. And after my dad and I had our falling out, it was Mom who kept the family together. She was the glue that held us all together. Angela was the other driver in that accident. She even had the gall to flat out admit that it was her fault." Olivia pulled Alex into an embrace and stroked her hair.

"I'm so sorry," Olivia whispered.

"I had been trying to write to my father for years. After Mom died, the letter started coming back. I always thought that he was at least reading them, even if he wasn't responding, but after that, I knew he wanted nothing to do with me. It was like I lost both of them that night," Alex said.

"Sweetheart, that was a long time ago, and it probably _was_ an accident," Olivia replied.

"I've tried to forgive her, but every time I look at her, I see Mom, and I think about everything she's missed out on. Angela was the one who drove over the line that night. Why isn't she the one in a pine box instead?" Alex asked.

"I don't know, hon. Sometimes, these things just happen," Olivia said. "They're not fair, and we can't explain them, but they happen." Alex sat up and wiped the tears from her eyes. "But Alex, if she hadn't come by here the other night, we'd probably both be dead." Olivia's words hit Alex like a ton of bricks. Olivia was right. Angela had redeemed herself for the accident, and Alex should forgive her. In her head, Alex understood that, but in her heart, she couldn't bring herself to take that step quite yet. The sun was dipping low on the horizon, and Olivia remembered that they were supposed to have a special dinner.

"Come on," she said to Alex. "Why don't you go splash some water on your face, and we'll get those lobsters cooking?" Alex smiled and headed for the bathroom. While she was gone, Olivia pulled out the lobsters, potatoes, corn, and other ingredients necessary. Her phone vibrated in her pocket.

"Benson," she answered, pinning the phone between her shoulder and cheek.

"Liv, what the hell happened up there?" came the irate voice of Elliot Stabler. Olivia moved her hand to the phone to hold her head upright.

"Elliot, we're fine," she said.

"That's not what I heard. I got a call from the Barnstable Country Sheriff's office about a shooting, and all you can say is you're fine?" he practically screamed.

"Elliot, calm down. There was an altercation, but it's over. Luke's dead," she told him.

"So I heard. Were you also planning to tell me that Alex was shot?" he asked.

"She's fine, El, really. The bullet missed everything major. She's a little sore, but she'll make a full recovery," Olivia answered. "Listen, I was just about to get dinner going, so…" 

"Wait, Liv. I'm coming up there," he said.

"Elliot, stop. You don't have to do that. I can take care of myself," Olivia replied.

"I'm not coming up to check on you," he said. "I want to have a look at the crime scene evidence up there, and I want to talk to the experts and possibly have some things sent back down here."

"Elliot, like I said, we're fine, so if you're coming up here on official business, fine, but otherwise, stop worrying," Olivia said, just as Alex appeared in the kitchen, ready to start cooking.

"Who is it?" Alex mouthed.

"Elliot," Olivia mouthed back. Alex rolled her eyes. She could appreciate how Elliot felt like Olivia's protective older brother, but sometimes, he took it too far.

"It is official, Liv. And I want you with me when I talk to them. I need you; I need my partner," he said, finally calming down.

"Ok, fine. Tomorrow," she said.

_**So, what do you think? Remember to leave a review, either here or on Twitter (BensonFan711)**_

_**Yes, still more story. Think you know Angela and Alex's secret? Think you know who Isaiah is? I'll leave you with something Angela keeps telling me:**_

"_**All is not as it appears to be."**_

_**Cryptic one, isn't she? I'm waiting patiently for her and the others to tell me the rest of the story, so I'll pass it on as I learn more.**_


	38. Chapter 38

**Disclaimer: All familiar SVU characters belong to Dick Wolf. I'm just having a little fun with them.**

_**I know, I know…it's been a while since I updated. Summer heat seems to do horrible things for my writer's chi. Anyway, here is the long awaited next chapter!**_

**Chapter 38**

Olivia couldn't help but laugh as she watched Alex struggle with the cracker to free the tender lobster meat from its protective shell.

"I'm sorry, hon. I didn't think this one through. I should have picked the halibut instead," she mused.

"Don't be ridiculous," Alex chided. "This tastes so much better than halibut." She sighed and handed the lobster claw to Olivia. "Would you mind?" Olivia took the claw from her, expertly opened it, and pulled out the entire claw completely intact. The two continued to laugh throughout the rest of the meal, putting aside the uncomfortable conversation from earlier that afternoon.

"Alex," Olivia began as they were piling dishes in the dishwasher. "I'm sorry about your mom."

"Just forget it, Liv. You didn't know," Alex repied.

"I know what it's like to lose a parent," Olivia told her. Olivia's own mother had died a few years prior to Alex's, and she would never forget the look on Captain Cragen's face as he informed her that her mother was gone. It had been the only time she could ever remember his voice cracking.

"I don't really want to talk about my mom," Alex answered as she snaked an arm around Olivia's waist and nuzzled her neck. "I just want to talk about you and me," she said, peppering kisses on Olivia's neck and cheek.

"Mmmm…" Olivia moaned, leaning back into her lover's embrace. "Are you sure you just want to talk?" Alex grinned and shook her head as she continued to devour the detective.

XxXxX

Elliot paced the living room of his own house like a caged animal. His head was plagued with thoughts of danger and frustration at his own inability to make any new headway on Olivia's case. He felt a violent rage coiling inside him, building to a breaking point, and the only way to release any of that energy was to continue to move.

"El, will you stop? You're making me crazy," his wife Kathy said.

"I can't help it. It sounded like the Barnstable County authorities had a new lead on Liv's case. Plus, she and Alex are up there, alone, and we still have no idea who is responsible for kidnapping Liv," he spat out.

"Well, then why don't you just go up there and find out for yourself," Kathy suggested.

"I plan to, but I called Liv, and she was adamant that she didn't want company until tomorrow," Elliot explained. Kathy raised an eyebrow.

"You're worried about her." It was a statement, not a question. Elliot stopped pacing and sighed.

"Yeah," he managed to say. He didn't have to say anything else. Kathy knew that the macho side of Elliot Stabler was rearing its ugly head. He felt insanely protective over his partner – his female partner. Maybe some of it was warranted. Both he and Olivia had experienced several brushes with death, and it brought them closer than either of them dreamed possible. Secretly, Kathy was relieved when she discovered that Olivia was interested in women because it put many of her fears to rest that there might have been something more than just a strong friendship between Olivia and Elliot.

"Elliot, go. You won't sleep until you do," Kathy said gently.

XxXxX

_Prominent Attorney's Home Burglarized_ blazed across the headline of the local newspaper. The press was calling this the worst crime in decades. Isaiah couldn't help but chuckle. It really was a sleepy little town if the worst crime was a burglary. In New York, these things were so common, they rarely made the papers. No, that was left for things like high profile murders, rapes, and other more brutal crimes.

He slammed the paper on his desk and swung his chair around to face the full length windows of his office. Central Park loomed in front of him several stories below. What was it about Detective Benson that prevented him from reaching her? How did she always manage to slip through his grasp? She was defiant and showed no sign of repentance, not to mention that she had caused the death of one of his people already. And now, Luke. The paper hadn't specifically mention the death of Luke, but he had failed to check in, so Isaiah had no choice but to assume the worst. Alex was alive though, and for that, he was grateful.

Luke had been the answer to his prayers. When he lost control of Olivia's training and actually raped her, he had condemned himself to a marriage with her. And, Luke had a pure heart, and would follow God's Word to the letter. With Luke gone, Isaiah was really left with no other choice but to kill her. He rose from the chair and pulled a bag out of the closet. He had anticipated this. While Luke was loyal, he was also weak. Isaiah was going to have to take care of Olivia Benson himself. He stopped just before he left, a gold picture frame catching his eye. The blonde woman in the photo stared back again, a carefree laugh etched forever across her face.

_Don't worry, my dear. I'll protect you from the world. You strayed down the path of evil, but I can bring you back. You'll be safe with me, _he thought. Steeling himself before he became too emotional, he swung the door open and headed for the parking garage, intent on carrying his plan through to the last detail.

XxXxX

Alex hovered over her lover and drank in the sight of Olivia as her brown hair splayed across the pillow under her. She leaned down and captured the brunette's lips once more for a kiss. Their tongues danced as the kiss turned from one of love to one of need. Alex's hand skimmed the detective's body through her clothes as she felt the heat of flushed skin radiate onto her palm. Olivia's lips moved along Alex's jaw down to her neck. Alex moaned as the tingling sensations rippled through her body, centering between her legs. Seizing her opportunity, Olivia rolled them so that she was now on top and continued to tease the blonde's skin with her tongue. Her hands skated along her lover's body, eliciting yet another moan from Alex, this one higher pitched and more needy.

Olivia straddled Alex and pulled on the buttons of her blouse. She wanted to explore every inch of skin as it was exposed, but she knew it would drive Alex more insane if she waited. Her fingers moved along the buttons across Alex's breasts and over the expanse of her flat stomach before she parted the halves, exposing Alex's creamy white skin to her, accented by the white lace bra she was wearing underneath. Olivia place her hands just underneath Alex's bra line and traced the sides of her body with feather light touches. Bending over her, she allowed her lips to trace the same patterns as her fingers. Alex twisted her fingers into Olivia's hair. She wasn't sure if she wanted the brunette to go higher or lower, but staying in the middle was driving her crazy. She lifted herself enough to remove the blouse from her shoulders and toss it to the floor. Olivia grinned as she continued to torture the blonde's skin with her lips.

Finally, deciding Alex had had enough teasing, Olivia moved higher, kissing Alex's left nipple through the lace.

"Liv, please…" Alex begged.

"Please, what, honey?" Olivia asked.

"You know what I need," Alex replied.

"Tell me," Olivia answered, switched from Alex's left nipple to her right. Alex responded by clawing at the hem of Olivia top. She tried to keep her injured arm still while using her good hand to grab the garment in the center and attempt a pitiful yank to pull in off.

"Would you like some help with that?" Olivia asked nonchalantly as Alex continued to tug. Alex nodded. _Good enough,_ Olivia thought. She sat up in order to give Alex a full view of her body as she crossed her arms over her and lifted her shirt over her head and tossing it to join Alex's blouse on the floor. Alex's good hand immediately went to cup Olivia's breast through her black satin bra. The sight of Olivia in front of her was intoxicating. Olivia lifted slid lower on Alex and popped the button on her jeans. She slid them down, kissing each inch of exposed skin as she went.

"God, Olivia, please!" Alex cried again.

"Please, what?" Olivia asked again.

"You know what," Alex hated when Olivia made her ask for what she wanted. She swore Olivia did it just to torture her. In truth, Olivia did it because she knew that deep down Alex enjoyed it. She always got wetter and came harder when she had to beg.

"Make love to me," Alex replied. Olivia rolled Alex onto her side so that she was facing her and lifted Alex's leg over her own. She reached between Alex's legs, pushed her panties aside, and searched for her folds. Olivia's fingers circled around Alex's clit, drawing another moan from Alex's throat. She pulled the blonde into another kiss as she continued to work the flesh between her legs. Alex screamed as Olivia plunged two fingers deep into her and massaged her most sensitive regions. She was close, so close. Olivia's thumb replaced her fingers on Alex's clit and the sensations overwhelmed Alex as her body contracted and twisted around Olivia, ecstasy flowing through every ounce of her being. Olivia guided her lover through her orgasm and stopped moving her finger only when Alex fell back onto the bed, glistening in moisture. Olivia brought her fingers to her own lips and licked them one at a time.

"Delicious," she said, smiling. "I love the way you taste." Alex responded by rolling Olivia onto her back.

"We're not even close to being finished yet," she whispered as she kissed Olivia again.

XxXxX

Elliot pulled the car into the driveway of Alex's beach house. The entire drive up, he wondered if he was doing the right thing. Olivia had asked him to wait a day, but he couldn't ignore that sinking feeling in his stomach that she was in terrible danger. He turned off the car, but didn't immediately get out.

_Maybe I should go to a hotel for the night,_ he thought. He had his hand on the key and was just about to turn the ignition when he heard a blood curdling scream rip through the night, coming from the house. Instantly, his head snapped up and he went into full cop mode. Drawing his weapon, he raced to the front of the house and tried the front door. Locked. He raced around to the back of the house and saw the screen door of the back porch wide open. He stepped inside and noticed the painting supplies littering the area. He furrowed his brow. As far as he knew, neither Alex nor Olivia painted. Another scream, this one fainter, and definitely one he recognized. Elliot ran through the house.

"Liv!" he called. No answer. The sound was coming from upstairs. Elliot reached the master bedroom and threw open the door, and the sight he found was not what he expected.

His very naked partner was on her back, obviously having the time of her life. The sheets were bunched around her waist, but there was obviously another person in the bed with her. _Shit. _Her head turned and he could see the lust in her brown eyes instantly replaced with fury.

"Jesus, Elliot!" she yelled, yanking the sheet to cover her exposed body and sitting up. "What part of 'tomorrow' don't you understand?" From her hiding spot underneath the covers, Alex suppressed a giggle. Elliot mumbled something and fled the room. Pulling the door behind him, he leaned his head back and silent prayed that some deity would take pity on him and strike him dead.

_**This scene has been stuck in my head for quite a while; I just wasn't quite sure how it would play out. So, anyway, love it? Hate it? Let me know!**_


	39. Chapter 39

**Do I really have to put the disclaimer here? You all should know by now…Dick Wolf owns 'em, I just mess with 'em.**

**Rating: M**

_**I know it's been a while, and my updates are coming slower and slower. The truth is that I've started a new job, which is going really well, but it takes away considerable from the time I have to write. Never mind that I've written this chapter several times and I think I might be ok with this version. I appreciate your patience, and I hope you enjoy the chapter.**_

**Chapter 39**

Olivia pulled herself out of bed and threw on her bathroom, pulling it closed around her. She yanked the door open and wasn't the least bit surprised to see Elliot still standing in the hallway.

"Discretion really isn't your strong suit, is it?" she spat. She had been so close to the best orgasm of her life, until he came charging in like a bull in a china shop.

"Liv, I'm sorry, I…I just…" Elliot stammered.

"Stop it, Elliot. Just stop it. I am so sick and tired of this overprotective bullshit. I went through the Academy and earned the badge too, you know. I can take care of myself," Olivia yelled.

"Like you did the night of the break in?" Elliot countered. Frosty silence filled the air. The instant the words were out there, Elliot wanted to take them back. He had hit below the belt, and he knew it. If looks could kill, Liv would have vaporized him with her glare.

"Get. Out," she said, carefully punctuating the words to make her point perfectly clear. She watched as he turned and headed down the stairs. She waiting until she heard the click of the door close behind him and sound of his car engine turning over before she headed back into the bedroom. She threw on a set of pajamas and climbed back into bed. Almost instantly, she felt an arm wrap around her waist and lips on the side of her face.

"Not now, Alex. I'm not really in the mood," she said. Alex sighed and rested her chin on Olivia's shoulder.

"Wanna talk about it?" she asked. Talk about it? What was there to talk about? The events of that night were replaying in Olivia's head. She had made a mistake. One, simple little mistake that had cost her so dearly. She had dropped her guard in her own home and hadn't checked the room thoroughly, and she had missed the second intruder, which set the entire series of events that followed into motion. She thought about the prison she had been held in, the torture she had endured, and the pain and suffering she had caused Alex. Perhaps there was some truth to Elliot's words after all.

Olivia gave Alex's arm a gentle squeeze. "I'm fine, hon," she said softly as a single, solitary tear slid down her cheek.

XxXxX

Isaiah pulled off the highway and turned down the road leading into town. He passed a familiar spot that always made his heart ache when he remembered the tragedy that had occurred there so many years earlier. He knew the story well; the story of the prominent Cape Cod couple who had lost everything here. In fact, he knew what most others did not.

"_Are you sure you aren't too tired to drive?" Denise Cabot had asked her husband before climbing into the car._

"_I'll be fine," he had replied. They were on their way up to the Cape after he had finished a grueling 72 hour shift at the hospital. Ultimately, his final patient had died on the operating table, and even though he knew there was nothing he or his surgical team could have done differently, he still blamed himself. A long weekend at the beach was just what he needed to clear his mind._

_After four long hours, he pulled the car off the highway onto the narrow New England roads. His eyelids felt heavy, in spite of the copious amounts of coffee he had consumed. Denise had asked him if he wanted to trade places nearly a dozen times, and he had replied with a little more annoyance each time, vehemently insisting that he was fine._

_Denise's head had slumped against the window, and she was dozing. He wasn't surprised; it was already after midnight. He shook his head, trying to shrug the sleep from his body. In less than 20 minutes, he and his wife would be safely tucked into bed. His mind drifted…_

_Suddenly, he saw two headlights barreling towards him. He swerved, as did the other driver. Adrenaline surged through him. It wasn't enough. The impact rang in his ears, deafening him. He felt his head fly forward and snap back. His chest struck the steering wheel, sending jolts of pain through him. The seat belt did its job; it prevented him from flying out of the seat. And then, as quickly as the chaos began, it fell silent. Deathly silent. He looked over at his wife. Blood was pouring from an unidentified wound on her head._

"_Denise," he said softly, shaking her slightly. "Denise, wake up." The doctor in him leapt forward. Her checked for signs of breathing. There were none. Time was of the essence now. He threw open the door and raced around to the other side of the car. Denise's door was mangled from the impact, and he was losing valuable time trying to wrench open the door. After what seemed like eternity, he pried the door open and gently placed his unconscious wife on the flat surface of the street. The other driver raced forward, apparently uninjured._

"_Call 911!" he shouted. In a state of semi-shock, the young woman pulled out her cell phone and dialed._

_He checked his wife again after giving her two rescue breaths. Still nothing. He felt for a pulse and found nothing. She was slipping away. He focused on giving her CPR, barely aware of anything else going on around him. The police arrived first. They took the statement from the other driver first. Still he continued CPR. Then the paramedics had arrived. He hadn't wanted to let them take over for him because as long as he was still working, there was a chance she would be ok._

"_Sir, she's in good hands, I promise," the paramedic had said before loading her into the back of the ambulance. Only then, as it was disappearing into the horizon, did he survey the damage. Both cars were destroyed, and the other driver was none other than his daughter's friend, Angela._

"_Mr. Cabot, we have all we need. This young woman says she knows you and has arranged for a ride," the officer said._

"_You don't need a statement?" he asked._

"_She gave us everything we need. Admitted she caused the accident," the cop answered._

"_Why, Angela? The accident wasn't your fault," he asked her once the cops left. "I was the one who drove over the line."_

"_Because," she answered, "God is giving you a second chance."_

"_Alex will never forgive you," he said._

"_I know," Angela answered softly. _

Isaiah's heart ached. So many had confided in him over the years. He knew many secrets, like this one, and he had guided so many of them down the path of righteousness. He pulled into the parking lot of his favorite bed and breakfast and checked in for the night. He was tired, and he wanted to make sure he was well rested for the days to come. He settled into the cozy room overlooking the water and slipped into a deep sleep.

XxXxX

Olivia tossed and turned wildly in her sleep. Alex placed a hand on Olivia's shoulder and whispered to her.

"Shhh, Olivia, everything's fine. No one is going to hurt you. Sleep, honey." Sometimes it worked; sometimes it didn't. Olivia calmed for a moment, and Alex settled back into the pillow next to her. She listened to the rhythmic sound of Olivia's breathing and closed her eyes. Moments later, a soft whimper came from Olivia's side of the bed. The whimpering got louder.

"Liv, honey, wake up," Alex said, nudging the detective. "Wake up, hon, it's just a nightmare." Olivia's eyes snapped open and she brought her hands to her face. "See? Everything's ok," Alex whispered.

"No, it's not," Olivia said somewhere between speaking and crying.

"What are you talking about?" Alex asked.

"I'm so sorry, Alex," Olivia said, her eyes welling with tears.

"You have nothing to be sorry about," Alex replied.

"Don't you get it?" Olivia asked, somewhat annoyed. "I made a mistake that night, and it was a mistake that nearly cost both of us our lives." Realization swept across Alex's face.

"You did everything you could," Alex said.

"It was a rookie mistake. I didn't check the room thoroughly. I should have seen the second guy there, and I didn't. It was stupid and reckless," Olivia explained.

"Oh, Olivia, don't do this to yourself. I don't care what you think you did wrong. I know you did the best you could that night. You saved my life, and we're both here now. That's all that matters, love," Alex whispered as she held Olivia in her arms.

_**So, what did you think? I love hearing reviews! Follow me here, on Facebook (Summer Jayne) or on Twitter (bensonfan711)**_


	40. Chapter 40

_**Greetings and salutations! Ok, ok, ok…this writer's block thing is seriously getting old. I sort of know where I'm going, but I have to figure out how we're going to get there. I think I might be nearing the end of this, so if you have any questions in any of the storylines, now is the time to speak up!**_

Elliot stared at the body on the slab in front of him. Luke's face looked sinister even in death. He tried to listen as the Barnstable County Medical Examiner reviewed her findings, but she wasn't telling him anything he didn't already know. Luke had been taken down by a cop during a home invasion. But yet, there was so much more to it than that. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't get the previous night out of his head.

"_I'm a big girl, Elliot. I can take care of myself."_

"_Like you did the night of the break in?"_

How could he have been so stupid? How could he have taken such a cruel pot-shot at Liv when she was already suffering entirely too much for one individual? And yet, the words had just fallen out of his mouth before he had a chance to swallow them back down. Once again, he had managed to make a mess of things where Liv was concerned.

"Detective?" The M.E.'s voice pulled him out of his thoughts, jarring him back to the task at hand.

"Hm? Oh, right. We'll need a DNA sample. This man is a suspect in several rapes, and we'll need something to compare the rape kit data to," Elliot responded.

"Of course. I'll make sure everything is delivered to your crime lab and that you receive copies of the medical reports."

Elliot left the morgue and thumbed his phone. He should call her. He wanted to call her. He needed to confess the her that he was an insensitive prick, and he didn't mean what he said. But on some level he must have meant it, or he wouldn't have said the words.

He tried to remember the last time he had seen that much fury in her eyes. With all of the monsters they had collared, with all of the degrading misogynistic scumbags they had bagged, never before had she looked at any of them with the same contempt, fury, and hatred he had seen from her last night. Sighing, he put his phone back in his pocket. He had a case to solve. No matter how much the victim despised him, he would still make sure she still got the justice she deserved.

XxXxX

Olivia sat on the back porch watching the waves pound at the shore as she sipped a cup of tea. Even wrapped in the comfort of a fluffy blanket, sipping searing hot tea, she still felt chilled. Her mind was elsewhere, miles away in New York. She wanted her life back desperately, and she had felt like it was finally within her grasp. But now, she wasn't so sure. Only yesterday, she had felt ready to pack up her things, return to the city, and try to resume her duties at the precinct.

"Liv?" Alex asked softly, stepping through the sliding door. Olivia turned toward her and smiled. She slid over on the wicker loveseat so that Alex could join her.

"Hey…come sit with me," Olivia replied. Alex sat next her and wrapped her arms around the blanket clad brunette.

"Are you feeling any better this morning?" Alex asked tentatively.

"I'm fine," Olivia replied, in the same steely tone she used at work.

"You weren't fine last night. Liv, you were whimpering in your sleep again," Alex said.

"I said, I'm fine," Olivia answered again curtly. She rose from her spot on the couch, and padded inside, closing the door behind her a bit more forcefully than she intended. Alex pursed her lips. When she and Olivia started dating, she had promised Olivia that she would never interfere with the Olivia's relationship with Elliot. They were friends. Good friends, best friends, but only friends. The bond between them had developed to the point where each was fiercely protective of the other, almost to a fault, but they could also wound each other worse than anyone else. Each was the other's Achilles heel. Damn, those two would destroy each other if they weren't careful.

And yet, in the back of Alex's mind, she knew that Olivia needed Elliot's friendship like she needed air. He could reach her on a level that no one else could. _That's how it is with cops, _Alex mused. _Even Kathy knows Olivia and Elliot share something she can't even begin to understand._ And with that, she made a decision that she hoped Olivia wouldn't hate her for.

So, two hours later, she found herself sitting across from Elliot in a booth that reminded her of a similar moment in time.

"What the hell were you thinking last night?" Alex asked. She hadn't meant to be that harsh, but she just couldn't help it. Elliot's comment to Olivia had angered her beyond rationality, not to mention the giant step backwards Olivia had taken towards her own recovery.

"Alex, before you lay into me, you have absolutely no idea how torn up I am about what I said to her," he began.

"You once told me that if I ever hurt her, I'd have to answer to you. Well, I probably should have reciprocated those conditions, because you did hurt her, Elliot, and I'm not happy." Alex was wearing the same scowl she did in court whenever the defense pulled a sleazy tactic that was almost certain to win over a jury.

"How is she?" Elliot asked. His shoulders were slumped over as he stared into his coffee cup. Alex studied him intently. His defeated expression was starting to convince her that he was telling the truth.

"She's…been better," Alex answered, choosing her words carefully.

"What happened?" Elliot asked, keeping his voice so low Alex had to strain to hear him.

"She tossed and turned half the night, whimpering in her sleep," Alex answered emotionlessly.

"Nightmares," Elliot said. It was a statement, not a question.

"Yeah," Alex answered.

"She hates sleeping in the crib because of that," Elliot answered idly.

"Elliot, she hasn't been back at the precinct since she was attacked," Alex observed.

"I know, but Olivia's been like this for as long as I can remember. Every time she's trying to work out something in her head, she shuts down from those who care about her and her body reacts with terrible nightmares. Since we've been partners, she's taken two lives. Until she talked through it, she'd relive those situations every time she closed her eyes." Elliot fiddled with the rim of his cup before he continued. "One time, we were both working a particularly grueling case. We had been up for at least 36 hours straight, but we were still needed to pull the overtime until we got the guy. Liv went to catch a nap, but I needed to vent some of my anger in the gym. When I went in to take a shower, she was screaming and thrashing around on the bed like someone was trying to kill her." 

"Does she know you were there?" Alex asked.

"Sure she does. I woke her up and calmed her back down, but after that, she was so embarrassed, she avoided sleeping in the crib unless it absolutely couldn't be helped," Elliot explained.

"So, how do we help her?" Alex asked.

"_We_ don't help her. _I _help her," Elliot replied. Alex couldn't help but laugh.

"If she'll talk to you," she retorted.

"Well, as long as she's not armed, I'm probably pretty safe," Elliot answered back. And as easily as the laughter appeared between them, it dissipated.

"Don't hurt her," Alex said, out of nowhere. She was looking at her cup and her voice cracked as she spoke barely above a whisper. Elliot reached out and took both of her hands into his. Her head lifted, and their eyes connected.

"I won't," he said. The intensity in his eyes said the rest to Alex. He loved her and protected her just as much as any member of his family. Hell, in many cases, she _was_ his family. So, when Elliot slipped out of the booth and headed towards the door, Alex knew that he would find some way to fix everything. And in understanding that, she got her own peek into the relationship he and Olivia shared.

_**As always, reviews are greatly appreciated. And remember to ask those questions in case there's a random storyline I opened and neglected to close. Yes, you will all find out who Isaiah is in the end! Follow me here, on Twitter (BensonFan711), or on Facebook (Summer Jayne). And, if you are interested in obtaining a copy of Lioness, let me know!**_


	41. Chapter 41

**Chapter 41**

_**Fair warning…I've been stuck in bed with a nasty cold for the past 36 hours or so, and I wrote this while doped up on cold medicine. I hope it doesn't completely suck!**_

**Chapter 41**

Olivia sighed as she slid the chain off its resting place and opened the door a couple of inches, just enough to see Elliot's face in the doorframe.

"What are you doing here?" she asked. She had meant for the sentence to come out with a hint of venom behind it, but instead, she just sounded tired.

"Liv, please, just hear me out," Elliot pleaded with her. She opened the door wider as an expression of fury crossed her face. She made no move to grant him entrance into her home.

"Oh, and why should I do that? Because you forced your way in here, after I explicitly told you not to come? Or because you've thrown a mistake I made back in my face? You know, for someone who claims to care about me, you sure have a funny way of showing it," she spat. There it was. The venom had returned. Elliot looked at his feet. There was so much he wanted to say to her, and yet, at this moment, her just couldn't find the words.

"I was hoping perhaps our partnership of twelve years would at least buy me five minutes," he said, almost sheepishly. Olivia sighed and stepped back.

"Five minutes," she warned as he stepped over the threshold. Elliot took a moment to survey her. After countless hours both at the precinct and in the field, she could never hide anything from him. To the casual observer, she was a mystery, but to him, she would never be anything but an open book. He took in the slight bagginess under her eyes, and even without Alex's information, he knew that she hadn't been sleeping well.

"The nightmares are back, aren't they?" he asked as he slid into a chair at the kitchen table. She responded by clenching her jaw. Elliot rubbed his hand across his face. Still, she made no move to sit. She just stood with her back ramrod straight, arms crossed, staring him down as if he was just another perp in another interrogation room.

"I'm sorry," he said, almost in a whisper. "I…" Damn, the words left again. His brain was filled with images and fragments of statements he wanted to say, but he couldn't seem to form a complete thought.

"Four minutes and twenty-seven seconds." Her voice was so cold. He knew his warm, caring, empathetic partner was in there somewhere, but all he could see was this block of ice. Was this the way the perps saw her? No wonder her arrest rate was so high! He was wasting time.

"I know it's not enough, and it will never be enough, but I'm sorry. Not just about last night, but for everything. Whatever you did or didn't do…I should have gotten you out of that wretched place sooner. If I had, then maybe…" _you wouldn't be so messed up_, he finished silently. He couldn't say that, not to her. It was just another attack, and that was the last thing in the world he wanted to do to her.

"Then maybe what? Maybe I'd be normal?" Olivia asked. "Well, guess what, Elliot. What happened, happened. You need to figure out how to deal with because from where I sit, you're the one with the problem."

"That's not what I was going to say," he lied. "Maybe things would be like they used to be. You know, you and me, side by side taking the bad guys of the street?" He smirked slightly, hoping to lighten the mood, but the expression soon left his face when he was faced with her stoic stare. "You're my best friend, Liv. I can't lose you. I don't care what happened in the past or what will happen in the future. All I know is that I need you back." Olivia knew his words were genuine; she could feel them more than she heard them. She sighed and sat down in the chair opposite him.

"I wish it was that simple. I wish is could just forgive and forget, but I can't. And the thing is, I'm not really sure who I need to forgive – you or me," she confessed.

"How many victims have you counseled over the years? Hundreds? Thousands? How many times have you ever told any of them that it was their fault?" he asked.

"None," she whispered.

"_I_ screwed up. _I_ put the blame on you, and I shouldn't have done that," he said.

"I'm a cop. I should have known better. How many times did they drill into us 'check your corners' at the Academy? I missed it, and that's what started all of this," she said.

"No, what started this is some crazy freak who thinks he has a divine mission to cure the world of homosexuality. It was the middle of the night, Liv. You weren't on duty, and you didn't have a partner. Mistakes happen, and when they do, it's up to the partner to make sure things don't go south. How many times have we compensated for each other's humanity over the years?" he asked her.

"I don't want to fight with you. Not about this," was the only answer she gave.

"Look, the truth is, I came up here last night because I was worried about you. I shouldn't have been, but I was. I've just seen so many victims who completely fall apart after they've been raped, and I was afraid that was happening to you. But there's this inner strength to you, Liv, that's always been there. No matter what life has thrown at you, you've always landed on your feet, stronger than before. You amaze me," he said. He was watching her face intently, and the single tear that slid down her cheek shattered his heart.

"I'm not that strong. I feel like I'm going to break at any moment. I almost lost Alex in the place I thought we were completely safe," she said.

"But you didn't," he said, taking one of her hands in both of his. "She's fine, but it sounds like you've been working your guardian angel overtime," he said, chuckling. Olivia's head snapped up.

"What did you say?" she asked breathlessly.

"You didn't lose Alex," he answered.

"No, after that," she pressed.

"What, that you had been working your guardian angel overtime?" He asked, puzzled. Olivia's head swam. The pieces all fell into place like a perfect puzzle, only she hadn't seen it before.

"Elliot, I need you to drive me into town," she said, suddenly business-like again.

XxXxX

Isaiah settled into the comfortable wing chair at the quaint bed and breakfast he had checked into upon arriving in town. He had wanted to see Olivia immediately, but it was going to take time. Alex mustn't know he was in town, nor could she ever find out his true identity. She would never understand.

Olivia. He had to get rid of her. She had caused more trouble than she could possibly know. After the stunt at the hospital, he knew that she was a lost cause. Only God himself could redeem her, and he would ensure that her redemption came very, very soon.

Then there was Alex. There was still a chance that she could be saved, or at least he hoped she could be. He couldn't give up on her, and whatever happened with Olivia, he needed to make sure that she was protected from the unpleasantness that would be required to deal with the feisty detective.

Yes, he could still save Alex. There was still hope for her.

XxXxX

Elliot followed Olivia's directions and soon they pulled into the parking lot of the now familiar store. Angela's red Beetle was nowhere in sight. Olivia pulled open the door with Elliot on her heels, and as usual, Jenna was polishing the unique jewelry in one of the many glass cases in the main room of the store.

"Olivia!" she exclaimed. "How are you?"

"I'm fine, Jenna. Is Angela around?" Olivia asked. Jenna's face fell.

"Olivia, I'm sorry. She's gone, but she left this for you," Jenna answered, handing Olivia an envelope from behind the counter.

"Gone? What do you mean 'gone'?" Olivia asked.

"She took off earlier today, and no one knows exactly where she went or when she's coming back," Jenna answered. A concerned look crossed Olivia's face. "Don't look so worried. She's come and gone like this for as long as I can remember."

"Do you have any idea when she'll be back?" Olivia asked.

"Hard to say. Could be weeks, could be years. Before you came to town, the last time I saw her was three years ago on my sixteenth birthday," Jenna answered.

"Maybe you should look inside the envelope," Elliot said quietly from behind her. Olivia opened the flap and pulled out the handwritten note in precise script.

_Dear Olivia,_

_When you find yourself seeking, remember that there is a God who loves you more than you can ever possibly imagine. Even when you turn your back, He is there, and it is in those times when He reaches ever farther to bring you back into His loving embrace. He created you, and He created Alex, and it delights Him that the two of you are happy together._

_You're prepared for what lies ahead of you. You have all of the tools you need to become a whole, happy person once again. _

_You're welcome._

_May God's Love be with you,_

_Angela_

Olivia read over the words twice before carefully folding the paper and returning it to the envelope. She wasn't quite sure what all of it meant, but she was starting to get used to Angela's cryptic voice.

_You're prepared for what lies ahead of you…_

The hair on her arm stood up. She knew what Angela was trying to tell her. She didn't want it to be true, but in her gut, she knew it was.

"Elliot," she whispered. "It's not over yet."

_**Reviews? You know I love them! Just to let you all know, I'm now a registered author on goodreads. com. Feel free to follow/friend me there. I also have a blog going on my profile, so feel free to check that out too.**_

_**I think we're getting to the end of this story. I hope you all have enjoyed it, and yes, I will answer the Isaiah question soon.**_


	42. Chapter 42

**Chapter 42**

_**Yeah…no words of wisdom tonight. It's been a rough week.**_

**Chapter 42**

"Olivia, wait!" Jenna called, just as Olivia and Elliot were leaving the store. "There's something else here for you." She took out a small package wrapped in simple brown paper containing Olivia's name in the same scrawl that was on the note.

Olivia tore the package to reveal a small book with the words "Holy Bible" embossed on the cover. Her eyes were drawn to the pale purple sticky note on the front, which read:

_Olivia,_

_Accept this for the gift that it is. If you find it offensive in any way, I simply ask that you pass it on to someone who might find it useful._

_Love,_

_Angela_

Olivia examined the book carefully. The top was littered with flags marking verses with keywords such as "faith," "guilt," "love," "peace," among other topics. Along the side, a single flag protruded from the pages with Olivia's name on it. She flipped open the book and found a passage highlighted in yellow. She made note of it and snapped the book closed.

"You two have a blessed Samhain," Jenna said as they started for the door once again.

"Sow-hen?" Olivia repeated.

"Samhain. It's the Wiccan New Year, and it falls on Halloween night. Legend has it that the veil between the living and the dead is the thinnest on that night. We celebrate the memory of our loved ones and honor our ancestors," Jenna explained. "In a town with as much history as this one has, it's sure to be an eventful night."

"I'm sure it will be," Olivia said. She and Elliot left the store and returned to their car.

"You ok?" Elliot asked, slipping into the driver's seat next to her.

"For now," she replied. Elliot took that as an adequate answer and started the car.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked as he pulled out of the parking lot.

"It's just…none of this religion stuff really mattered before," she explained.

"And now it does," he finished, mirroring her own thoughts.

"Yeah," she said. "I mean, I don't understand how so many people can read the same book and come up with so many different ideas of what's right and wrong."

"Well, it's kinda like any other book, right? How many different interpretations are there of, say, _Romeo__and__Juliet_?" he asked.

"Maybe, but people don't go running around, raping and torturing others because of a line they read in _Romeo__and__Juliet,_do they? And yet, history is chalked full of wars that are started over a book!" she countered. She studied him for a moment. "You're a devout Catholic; you've read this same book. Do you think it's a sin to be gay?" Elliot hesitated.

"I think that there are things in 'that book,' as you call it, that are beautiful and clear. But no, I don't think it's a sin to be gay. Maybe that makes me a bad Catholic, but my own experience tells me that there are homosexual relationships that are just as blessed as heterosexual ones. I have no idea how God decides who should be with who, but I know He does. Otherwise, Kathy and I never would have lasted 25 years," he answered.

"Well, maybe you should take this, then. I don't think I have much use for it," she said, tossing the book in the back seat.

"Angela gave it to you. Will you do something, for me?" he asked. Olivia rolled her eyes.

"What?" she asked, with a hint of sarcasm.

"Take it for a few days. Thumb through it, but do it with an open mind. I'm not saying you have to become a devout Christian, but take a look at what's really in there. I recommend starting with the Gospels. The Father Jesus speaks of is a heck of a lot more relatable than the fire and brimstone God of the Old Testament," he said. Olivia reached back and picked up the volume again.

"Fine, but only because you asked me to. And you owe me for this one," she said.

"That's a debt I'm more than willing to take on," he replied, stopping the car in front of the house. "Do you want me to stay until Alex gets back?" Olivia rolled her eyes again. "Ok, ok, I get it…I'm being too overprotective. Call me if you need anything, or if you just want to talk," he said as she climbed out of the car. "Halloween is tomorrow, after all," he poked with a smile.

"Don't tell me you really believe all that veil-between-the-worlds stuff," she chided.

"Not for a second," he answered with a smile.

Olivia put the book on the coffee table as she sank into the couch, folding her arms in front of her. She stared at it, hoping if she glared hard enough it would simply burst into flames or just disappear altogether. And yet, it just sat there, mocking her. She let out a frustrated sigh and crossed the room to the windows overlooking the beach. There was something about the rhythmic motion of the waves that calmed her chaotic mind. They moved with purpose, constantly shaping the beach before her, silently pounding away at the rocks until they became sand. Was she like one of those rocks? Stubborn and bull-headed? And all of these people who had come into her spiritual life, were they like the waves? Constantly lapping at her until she yielding and washed away like the sand?

She stepped out onto the porch and eyed the painting that she had spent hours trying to perfect, and yet, it looked like a child had done it with a set of finger paints. Angela had told her to put her emotion into her work, but it didn't seem to be there. And now Angela was gone. Olivia still had so many questions for her. Why her? Why did she have to go through what she went through? Why did the Prophets of Leviticus have to break into her apartment? And if God really was so damn loving, why did He allow it to happen? And, if all of that wasn't bad enough, it still wasn't over. Isaiah was still on the loose, and possibly trying to hunt her down. The rage started low in her belly and flooded her entire being. She wanted to explode with all of the anger and hatred she felt. Almost of their own volition, her arms snatched the canvas and held it high over her head. With a shout, she brought the canvas hard against the wall, snapping the frame in two. She threw the pieces across the porch and collapsed into a ball, heaving with sobs.

XxXxX

Alex pulled her Mercedes into the garage and extracted the two pumpkins from the trunk. She entered through the side door and heard the echo of Olivia's sobs as she set them on the table. She hurried over to the porch door, where she found Olivia curled in a ball, crying so hard she could barely breath. Alex rushed to her side and wrapped her arms around the brunette.

"Olivia, honey, what's wrong?" she asked. Olivia tried to form words, but she couldn't manage anything coherent.

"Are you ok? Did someone hurt you?" Alex asked. _Damn,__Elliot,_she thought. _If__he__screwed__this__up__again,__he__won__'__t__have__to__worry__about__whether__or__not__Olivia__is__armed__because__I__'__ll__kill__him__myself._ Olivia shook her head vehemently.

"Then what, honey? Talk to me," Alex cooed. Olivia rested her head against Alex's chest and allowed Alex to stroke her hair.

"I can't do this anymore," Olivia sputtered.

"Do what, sweetie?" Alex asked.

"I can't keep hiding. I want him in prison. Or better yet, dead," Olivia blurted out. _Isaiah,_ Alex thought.

"I know, honey, and nothing would make me happier than to watch you put a bullet in him yourself," Alex said. Olivia's sobs eased. "Let it out, hon," Alex whispered, and there they stayed until Olivia had cried as much as she could. Alex continued to whisper words of love to her as she let out the emotion she had been holding in an iron grasp.

Olivia suddenly wiped her eyes and pulled away from Alex.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"For what?" Alex asked, taking her hand.

"I didn't mean to break down like that," Olivia said, blushing slightly.

"Olivia, I want you to listen to me very carefully, ok?" Alex said. She waited until Olivia's brown eyes met her blue ones. "I. Love. You. And, I want you to be able to share everything with me, even the parts that are unpleasant. You don't have to be the strong one all the time." Olivia smiled.

"I know. I've just been alone for so long that it's hard for me to open up to anyone. And, being the only girl in a squad full of guys, well…" Olivia trailed off.

"You feel like you have to be just as rough and tough as they are," Alex finished. Olivia nodded and relief swept across her face. "Olivia, in case the boobs and the hips weren't a giveaway, I'm not one of the guys." Olivia laughed.

"You know, I _had_ noticed that your parts were a little different from the men I dated." It was Alex's turn to laugh this time. "I love you," Olivia said.

"I love you, too," Alex said, giving her a quick kiss.

"Come on, I have a surprise for you," Alex said, leading Olivia into the kitchen. Olivia eyed the two pumpkins on the kitchen table.

"Please tell me you don't expect those things to turn into carriages," Olivia joked.

"Nope, we're going to make jack o' laterns. It's bad luck to not have at least one on the front stoop on Halloween," Alex explained.

"Since when did you become so superstitious?" Olivia asked. Alex was always so practical when it came to things like this.

"Only up here. There's something about this town that brings out the superstitious nature in me. Maybe it's the ghost that haunts this house," Alex said, nudging Olivia with a slight smile.

"Maybe," Olivia smirked.

_**Reviews are always appreciated…I think there are still 4 or 5 people reading this. **_


	43. Chapter 43

**Chapter 43**

_**I have been trying to get this chapter up for days, and yet, life seems to keep getting in the way! Enjoy.**_

"Alex, this is really disgusting…and cold!" Olivia cried as she stuck her hand inside the pumpkin Alex had expertly sliced the top off of.

"Oh, come on, Liv, lighten up. It's not like you haven't seen worse," Alex chided.

"That's different. The M.E. is the one who has to actually _touch_ the dead bodies. All I do is stand around and figure out what happened," Olivia countered. Alex had pulled off the top of the second pumpkin.

"When you're done with that one, you can start on this one," she said, nudging the pumpkin towards Olivia.

"Oh, no. If I have to stick my hand in one of these things, so do you," Olivia said. Alex held up her perfectly polished fingers.

"I just got a manicure," she said, smirking.

"Oh, well, we wouldn't want Miss Alex to ruin her manicure now, would we?" Olivia replied sarcastically. "Say, Alex, that's a really cute top on you." Alex looked down at the plain knit top she had thrown on to run errands.

"Um, thanks?" Alex responded, unsure of where Olivia was going with this, especially since she was still sporting an evil smirk.

"Mhm. It would be a shame if something were to…" Olivia scooped out a small handful of pumpkin goo and flung it at Alex's chest. "Oh no! I'm so sorry! It slipped." Shock covered Alex's face. She narrowed her eyes and reached into the pumpkin in front of her. Taking her own handful of pumpkin insides, she flung it back at the brunette, eliciting a shriek as Olivia dodged. Orange goo dripped from her hair as a result.

"I can't believe you just did that!" Olivia squealed.

"Did what?" Alex asked as she lobbed another handful of pumpkin at Olivia. Olivia's eyes narrowed as she plunged her hand back into the pumpkin.

"You are in so much trouble," Olivia replied, returning fire. Alex ducked and the orange glob landed squarely on the refrigerator door.

"You missed," Alex said, just as she caught a faceful of pumpkin.

"I didn't that time," Olivia smirked. Olivia reached in for another handful as Alex lunged at her.

"Liv! Stop!" Alex exclaimed, giggling. "How old are we? Five?" Alex wrestled with Olivia until the brunette finally dropped the slimy substance in her hand. Olivia laughed at the pitiful attempt Alex was making to subdue her.

"Let go of me!" Olivia exclaimed, still laughing.

"Only if you promise to stop throwing stuff at me," Alex said. "Otherwise, I'll have to get more…creative," she added, poking at a particularly ticklish spot on Olivia's ribcage. Olivia shrieked again and pulled back from Alex.

"Ok, ok, you win!" she surrendered. Alex finally released her grip on Olivia.

"Here, draw your face," Alex said, holding out a black marker to Olivia.

"Killjoy," Olivia said as she started to sketch out a pattern on her pumpkin. An hour later, the result was two hand carved jack o' lanterns, a messy kitchen, and two women covered in pumpkin guts, but both women were wearing smiles.

"I feel really disgusting," Alex mentioned. Olivia snorted. It was typical of Alex to feel dirty whenever she got personal with something resembling food.

"Why don't you go upstairs and hop in the shower? I'll find candles and put these out on the doorstep," Olivia said.

"Thanks, hon," Alex replied, giving Olivia a quick kiss before disappearing up the stairs. Olivia rummaged through drawers until she found two tea lights and a book of matches. She lit the candles and placed the glowing jack o' lanterns on the front step. As she latched the door, she heard the water stop running, and a wicked thought crossed her mind.

Grinning, she ran up the stairs to the master suite, pausing at the linen closet to pull out a few blankets. She hear the hum of the hair dryer, and she knew, from her vast experience, that she would have exactly twenty-two minutes to finish her plan. She spread the blankets out in front of the fireplace in the master suite, gathered the scented candles Alex loved from around the room, and arranged them so that a soft glow encompassed the area around the blankets. She pulled the pillows from the bed and arranged them away from the fireplace. While the house may have been built in the 1600s, the Cabots had retrofitted the fireplace years ago so that all it took was a flip of a switch and a fire was blazing. Olivia stood back to admire her work as the hair dryer flipped off. Exactly three minutes later, a clean Alex emerged from the bathroom.

"What's all this?" she asked, feigning innocence.

"Tell me, Alex, is it a sin to want to share a moment of intimacy with the most beautiful woman in the world?" Olivia asked, taking Alex's hands in her own.

"Not at all," Alex replied. "But it's impossible for you to be with the most beautiful woman in the world, because that would be you." Alex leaned forward and caught Olivia's lips in a deep kill. Olivia reached up to wrap her arms around Alex, but the blonde had place her hands on Olivia's shoulders and pushed her back.

"What the…" Olivia started.

"You didn't let me finish," Alex said. "Right now, the most beautiful woman in the world is still covered in pumpkin." Olivia looked down. Yep, there were still dry crusted orange splotches on her clothes. "Go make yourself pretty, and I promise I will make it worth your while."

"Why bother? We're just going to get dirty again," Olivia asked, grinning.

"Go," Alex said, pointing towards the bathroom door. Olivia rolled her eyes and headed for the bathroom, knowing that arguing with Alex at this point would be futile. She rushed through her shower, towel dried her hair, and wrapped herself in a fluffy terrycloth robe. When she emerged from the bathroom, she noticed that Alex had not wasted any time. She had dressed in a silky, almost see-through ice blue nightgown that fell to the top of her thighs. The material wrapped around her, parting at the center, giving Olivia a peak at the smooth skin of her perfectly flat stomach and the matching ice blue thong. Olivia's jaw dropped.

"When did you…where did you…" Olivia stammered.

"I take it you like it?" Alex asked, practically purring.

"I love it," Olivia said as she crossed the room. She gathered Alex into her arms and captured her lips in a heated, passionate kiss. Alex moaned at the contact, as a familiar warm sensation settled between her legs. The peal of Olivia's cell phone caused the brunette to lean her head back in frustration.

"Dammit, Elliot…" she muttered, breaking contact to snatch the phone from the nightstand. Alex crept up behind her and snaked her hands around the brunette's slim waist.

"Let it ring," she whispered as she nuzzled Olivia's ear.

"I can't…" Olivia replied, her voice laced with huskiness. Alex nibbled lightly on Olivia's earlobe. "Uhh…if I do, he'll just come over here." She punched the button to answer the phone.

"Hi, El," she said, trying to erase the lust from her voice. Alex continued to lavish attention on her neck and jawline.

"Stop that," Olivia said in a loud whisper. Alex merely grinned and continued to tease her lover.

"Stop…what?" Elliot asked.

"Not you. What do you need?" Olivia asked sharply.

"Um, I just got a call from the Barnstable County Sheriff's office. They have some things about your case that they'd like to discuss with us tomorrow afternoon," he told her. Olivia was doing everything she could to restrain herself from moaning over the phone.

"I don't know, Elliot. I'm the victim in this one. I really shouldn't be involved in any part of the investigation, here or in New York," she answered. Alex slipped a hand into the front of Olivia's robe and grazed her ribcage lightly. She was relentless, continuing to tease Olivia, smirking at the brunette's attempt to remain calm as she talked to Elliot.

"They've extended the invitation as a courtesy to a fellow cop," Elliot explained. Olivia let out a slight moan as Alex's fingertip grazed the underside of her breast. "Hey, are you sure you're ok?"

"I'm fine, Elliot," she answered quickly. "Fine, whatever, I'll see you tomorrow." Olivia said, panting slightly.

"I'll pick you up around 2:00," Elliot said.

"Fine. See you then," Olivia answered, the disguise in her voice started to melt. She punched the phone to end the call and threw it aside. She twisted in Alex's arms so that she was facing the blonde, who was sporting a wicked smile.

"You, are terrible," Olivia said shaking a finger at Alex.

"Mmm, yes I am, but you love it," she answered.

"Come here," Olivia whispered, taking Alex into her arms once again. The two women fell into a heated embrace, touching, exploring, and tasting each other in front of the fire. For the first time since the attack, Luke's face never entered Olivia's mind. All that was present was her love for Alex. Even as Alex held the brunette under her, unknowingly replicating positions Olivia had experienced with Luke, Olivia remembered nothing. For a couple of blissful hours, everything was as it was before.

XxXxX

Isaiah was making his final plans. It seemed appropriate that the night he would destroy Olivia Benson would be Halloween. Halloween was always followed by All Soul's Day, a day of redemption, following the banishment of the demons that lurked on the last night of October. Alex was innocent in all of this. Somehow, he would find a way to reach Alex and pull her wholesome nature from her. Of course, that was all impossible until Benson was gone.

_Damn, Luke,_ he thought. _Why did you have to go and get yourself killed?_ Isaiah abhorred killing, but he knew that there were times when violence was required. If only Luke hadn't been killed; he had been so attracted to Olivia. Even better, he thought Olivia could be redeemed, and Isaiah was perfectly willing to let him take care of Olivia. With Luke gone, though, there was no one who was able, or interested, in taking her on. And, to Isaiah, she was a lost cause. She was the reason Alex continued to live such a distasteful, sinful life. Not after tomorrow.

_**Dun, dun, DUN! We're almost there! Looks like Isaiah's identity will be known on Halloween night. I hope you all enjoyed Alex and Liv having fun with pumpkins!**_


	44. Chapter 44

**Chapter 44**

_**What? Two chapters in two days? Well, what can I say…this is what happens when I get close to the end of the story.**_

Olivia woke with a start. For a moment, she felt disoriented. She didn't immediately recognize her surroundings, but gradually her brain piece together the data her eyes were sending. She glanced to her left and saw Alex lying on her back with a hand lazily draped on the pillow near her face. Her blonde hair fanned her angelic face, and the sight took Olivia's breath away. Her breathing was soft and even, and a slight hint of a smile played across her peaceful place.

They had fallen asleep in front of the fire. Or, more to the point, Olivia had fallen asleep in front of the fire with her head nestled on Alex's chest. Olivia so rarely slept well that, unless she was in the throes of a nightmare, Alex hated to wake her. Even though the pile of blankets had been quite comfortable earlier, Olivia's back was complaining from sleeping on the hard floor, and she knew it was only a matter of time before Alex was feeling the same ache.

Olivia wasn't sure what had woken her. She knew she had been having a wild dream. It wasn't a nightmare, exactly, but it was unsettling. She remembered that she had become aware of the fact that she was dreaming, and had chosen to wake up. Why did that seem so important to her? Not that she had woken up, but that she had _chosen_ to wake up. She knew that Angela had been present in her dream world, and that she had been trying to tell her something important, but she couldn't recall anything more specific than that. All she knew was that at this particular moment, the last thing she wanted to do was sleep. Her body felt restless, like it was preparing itself for a fight.

Even as Olivia sat up, Alex didn't stir. Olivia gently lifted her sleeping lover and deposited her onto the bed. She wrapped the covers around Alex and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. Alex cooed softly, rolled onto her left side, and her breathing returned to it's even, steady rate. Olivia grabbed her discarded robed, wrapped it around her naked form and slipped down the stairs. She wandered into the kitchen and placed a kettle of water on the stove to boil. The cabinet next to the stove contained and assortment of teas, from which she selected a gentle chamomile, and prepared a mug for herself.

As she puttered around the first floor, she wandered into the living room. Her eyes were drawn to the Bible on the coffee table; the same one Angela had left her. Except now, it was open. A chill rippled through her body. She glanced around looking for signs of disturbance. She knew that she had left the book closed, and yet it was clearly opened in front of her. Nothing else seemed out of place. She walked to the coffee table and glanced at the page it was open to. "Matthew" was displayed in bold block letters. Olivia flipped to the page before it, which bore only two words: "New Testament." This was the very spot Elliot had told her to start reading.

Part of her brain was screaming for her to close it, go back upstairs, and bury herself next to Alex. But then there was a softer voice, calm, compassionate, urging her to read. Surrendering to her curiosity, Olivia curled up in the corner of the sofa, place her feet on the coffee table, and began to read. Her mother hadn't been religious at all, so her knowledge of the story of Jesus was minimal. But the more she read, the more intrigued she was. She could see so much of herself in this man that they called the Son of God. He adored children. Angela herself had scrawled a note in the margin about Jesus showing love to all, even those who were often ignored in society at the time. Jesus had embraced the sick and forgotten. Hadn't Olivia done the same thing as an SVU detective? The stigma of sexual assault often left victims alone, but never to her. She wanted justice for them because it was all she had to offer.

She continued through the Book of Mark. Another testimony of the love the Jesus showed towards everyone he came across. Well, almost everyone. He clearly despised the Pharisees. Olivia took in Angela's notes that the Pharisees were the hypocrites of their time, demanding that the people conform to their way of doing things, when in fact, they lived lives of luxury and condemned all who disagreed with them. And yet, there were the tax collectors, who were just as hated within the society, but those who were humble and fair, Jesus embraced. She continued through the gospels of Luke and John. She read of the brutality of the crucifixion, and it moved her on a level that had long laid dormant. A wave of emotion swept over her and a single tear fell for the man who had been tortured and executed for trying to teach the world about a compassionate fatherly God. She didn't understand that level of violence, even though she had seen the horrors one human could inflict on another many times. She was in the middle of Acts when she heard Alex's footsteps on the stairs.

"Liv? What are you doing down here?" Alex asked softly.

"I couldn't sleep," Olivia replied.

"Nightmares?" Alex asked.

"No, surprisingly enough. I just couldn't sleep anymore," Olivia said. Alex yawned and lowered herself on the opposite side of the couch.

"Whatcha reading?" she asked, still groggy. Olivia suddenly felt self-conscious. She wasn't quite sure she was ready for the reaction Alex was about to give her. She didn't want to be called out for all of the hateful and hurtful things she had said and done when Alex had been doing the very thing she was at this moment. And yet, there was no way to hide it.

"Umm, well…" she stammered. Alex glanced over her shoulder when she didn't get a quick response. The razor thin sheets of onion paper and the columns of text were a dead give away.

"Is that a Bible?" Alex asked, furrowing her brow in confusion.

"Yeah, it is," Olivia answered softly. She braced herself for the torrent of accusations she expected from Alex. Instead, Alex simply nodded her head and pulled herself into a more comfortable position.

"Find anything good?" Alex asked. Olivia was floored.

"You're not going to yell at me?" Olivia asked.

"For what? Reading the Bible? It's not a crime," Alex said, confused once again.

"But, the hospital. When I caught you reading the Bible, I said some pretty awful things to you. And here I am, doing the exact same thing," Olivia explained.

"Liv, sometimes, we need the Bible, and sometimes it can be scary as hell. We were in such different places then, and you were in no way open to or ready to hear about anything that's in there. So no, I'm not mad, and no part of me wants to yell at you," Alex paused. "So, let me repeat my previous question. Anything good?"

"I've been reading the story of Jesus. I think these are the gospels; I don't really even know. And you know, he wasn't such a bad guy," Olivia said. Alex chuckled. Olivia hadn't been raised in a church, so to hear her interpretation of what she read was similar to that of a child. She was still naïve about so much of it.

"You think?" Alex asked.

"Hey, stop it. I'm trying to be serious here," Olivia replied, slightly hurt by the response.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to laugh. Keep going," Alex said, genuinely interested in her girlfriend's newfound knowledge.

"Well, Jesus loved the children, the sick, and the people that were generally outcasts. And he taught his disciples to do the same. He loved the sinners and the tax collectors, too. Why don't Christians ever bring up this part of the Bible?" Olivia mused.

"Olivia, this is what I've been trying to tell you all along. This," She pointed emphatically at the bible in Olivia's lap, "is what it means to be a Christian. To follow the teachings of Jesus. This is what Rev. MacMillan has taught at Westside for as long as I can remember."

"Then why do so many alleged Christians use the Bible to justify abuse towards people who don't fit into their perfect mold?" Olivia asked.

"You mean like us?" Alex asked. Olivia nodded. "I don't know, Liv. I wish I could give you an answer, but I just don't know. What I do know is that the God I learned about would abhor the sort of turmoil you endured in His name," Alex told her. Olivia took a moment to digest Alex's words.

"Do you remember when Joan came over to bring us dinner?" Alex asked, jarring Olivia out of her thoughts. Olivia nodded. "You were so convinced that she had some sort of ulterior motive, and all she was trying to do was share her love, Christ's love."

"But she just barged into our lives, and she had no right…" Alex was nodding to Olivia.

"Listen to me. Jesus fed the hungry, took care of the sick, and displayed genuine, sympathetic love towards all he came into contact with. As much as he preached, his actions followed right along with his words. You had just been released from the hospital, and I was doing everything I could to take care of you, and us. Believe it or not, all I would have had to do was pick up the phone, and there would have been a line of people bringing us food. And more would have shown up to do basic housework or the laundry or take you to the doctor or whatever else we needed," Alex explained. Olivia replayed those events in her mind. The Reverend and Alex praying over her bed. Joan and her truly genius cooking. Had she misjudged them? All of them? Was it possible that they had read these same words, and instead of displaying their faith on Sunday mornings, they were trying to live their lives the way Jesus had shown them.

"Rev. McMillan and I knew that after everything you had been through that you wouldn't be comfortable accepting help from them, so they kept their distance. I think there's something in there about that, too," Alex said, pointing to the Bible again. "It's something about 'shaking the dust from your feet.'" Olivia flipped through the pages.

"Matthew 10:14. 'If anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words, shake the dust off your feet when you leave that home or town.' That one?" Olivia read. Alex nodded.

"They knew you didn't want them around you. They didn't know why, and they didn't need to, but they realized that they were doing more harm than good, so they left you alone," Alex said.

"Me?" Olivia asked. "What about you?" Alex pursed her lips.

"They've given me the support that I needed," she answered.

"So what, they own you now? Now you have to make dinners and all of that stuff?" Olivia asked.

"Not at all. That's the beauty of it. Jesus never asked for anything in return, and neither do they. Will I do some of those things? Probably, after we get home. But I'll do them because I _want_ to do them, not because anyone's forcing me to. Religion isn't about force and coercion; it's about love. Nothing more, nothing less," Alex said.

"Alex, do you think…I mean, when we get back…damn, could I maybe…" Olivia stammered. She couldn't figure out how to word her question properly.

"Olivia, do you want to come to church with me?" Alex asked gently.

"Yeah, I think I do. I mean, I don't know if I want to go every Sunday, and I don't know if I even want to stay for the entire service, but…" she lost her words again.

"You're curious," Alex filled in.

"A little. It all seems too good to be true," Olivia confessed.

"Liv," Alex said, lifting the brunette's chin with her index finger, "that's exactly what I thought, too." Olivia's finger played along the sticky note with her name on it. Alex's eyes drifted to the source of the sound of the rattling paper. "What that mark for?" she asked, nodding to Olivia. Olivia flipped to the page and read. It was the exact verse that had drawn her to read in the first place when she left Crossroads with Elliot.

"1 Peter 3:8-9. 'Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing,'" Olivia read.

_**There you go, the mysterious verse left for Olivia as a message from Angela. Cryptic as always (but that's why she's so fun!), but packed full of meaning. Isaiah's coming back. For those of you paying attention, it's now Halloween morning.**_


	45. Chapter 45

**Chapter 45**

Olivia put the Bible back on the table. She had had enough deep conversations for one morning. She stretched and yawned, suddenly aware of the fact that she hadn't really slept the night before.

"Liv, honey, why don't you go take a nap? I was just getting read to go for a run anyway," Alex suggested.

"If I sleep now, I won't sleep tonight," Olivia answered.

"Elliot's coming to pick you up at 1:30, right?" Olivia nodded. "Ok, then you can easily sleep for two hours and still have enough time to get ready. Go on, I'll wake you when I'm done with my workout."

Alex carefully tucked Olivia into bed and sat with her until the brunette was snoring softly. Snoring was a good sign where Olivia was concerned; it meant that she was in a deep enough sleep to actually be productive. Alex changed into a jogging suit and headed out to the beach.

Alex's feet pounded into the sand. The crisp sea air filled her lungs, rejuvenating her, filling her with energy. She remembered a time when Olivia would be right beside her, as they ran through one of the many jogging paths in Central Park. It had always been part of their routine, and Alex had looked forward to those early morning runs with her beautiful brown-eyed detective. Olivia challenged her. Her profession in law enforcement forced her to stay in shape. Add to that she was just genuinely faster than Alex, and those workouts become something of a daily challenge to see who could make it through the park first.

As Alex continued up the beach her mind drifted away from Olivia and back to her childhood. The way Olivia had spoken about Jesus was right in line with what Alex had always been taught in Sunday school. Alex herself had asked about certain verses in the Bible, but her favorite Sunday school teacher had said something that resonated deep within her, and she never forgot it. Her teacher had said that the best way to read the Bible was to read it from a place of love. When a verse seemed to come from a place of hate, then it should be tucked away and examined at another time. But when the verses came from love, those were the ones that were relevant. Now it seemed as though Olivia was arriving at that place on her own. Alex took a minute to marvel at the intelligence of her lover. She had been taught everything and groomed with the knowledge she possessed, and Olivia had figured everything out on her own.

Alex turned on the beach and headed back towards the house. Something was bothering her about Olivia. She hadn't mentioned any details about the case, and she seemed less than enthusiastic whenever Elliot wanted to involve her or even just inform her. In the beginning, she had been relentless about solving her own case, but now, she just didn't seem to care. Had she given up? Or was this indicative of more things to come? Did she want to go back to work, or did then entire idea of being a detective disgust her now? Alex didn't know. There was so much she didn't know about the person Olivia had become. Although she didn't seem fragile anymore, she was hardly the person she used to be. And yet, Alex loved her with all her heart, and Alex clung to the hope that the fire would return to her once they were back in New York. At the very least, Olivia needed to start running more on sleep and less on coffee.

Alex glanced at her watch as she turned back towards the house. She had just enough time to shower and dress before she had to wake Olivia. She slipped off her running shoes and padded up the stairs, carefully avoiding the steps that creaked. She opened the door to the master bedroom and peered in before opening it completely. Olivia was still sound asleep, but she had rolled onto Alex's side of the bed and had her arms firmly wrapped around Alex's pillow. Alex smiled and shook her head. Whenever Olivia slept alone, somehow, she always wound up with Alex's pillow.

_Olivia was surrounded by bushes. They were so tall she couldn't see the tops of them, but there were corridors carved out through them._

What is this place?_Olivia__thought__as__she__took__a__couple__of__hesitant__steps__forward.__In__front__of__her,__the__path__made__a__sharp__right__hand__turn.__Behind__her,__it__stretched__for__an__eternity.__The__voice__of__a__woman__cut__through__the__silence._

"_Olivia!" it cried out. It sounded panicked. Was it a victim? Olivia picked up her pace and took the path that turned. Again and again the voice called to her. It sounded familiar, but Olivia couldn't put a face to it._

"_Where are you?" Olivia called out. She continued to weave her way through the maze. She would walk toward the voice and then the next time it called out, it seemed to have moved to a completely different location. Olivia became so frustrated that she tried to shove her way through the bushes, but she found them to be far more dense than the average bush. There was no ways she could part it. She continued to duck through the maze until she came to a clearing. In the center was a white pillar with a bust perched on the top. She approached the statue, curious. _

_The hair on the back of her neck stood on end as a chill ripped through her body. She knew that face. It was the face of the preacher from the church service the Prophets of Leviticus held. She turned to run from it and found her path completely blocked. She was overcome with panic, and yet, she couldn't understand why this particular figure was causing this sort of extreme reaction. _

"_Olivia!" the voice cried out, and a new corridor slid open, away from the horrible bust that conjured fear from Olivia. She ran at full speed both away from the statue and towards the voice._

_She came to another clearing. This one looked like Angela's gallery, right down to the artwork and knick knacks on the shelves. There was a child hovering by the fountain of Kali. She was sitting on the floor, her knees tucked up to her chest with her arms wrapped around them. Her head was buried between her arms and a curtain of curly black hair covered her._

"_Are you ok?" Olivia asked, approaching the child slowly. The girl's head snapped up and she looked at Olivia but said nothing._

"_My name is Olivia. Are you lost?" The girl blinked at her. _

"_I'm afraid," the girl answered._

"_What are you afraid of, honey?" Olivia asked._

"_I'm afraid he'd going to kill my mommy," the girl answered._

"_Who's going to kill your mommy?" Olivia asked._

"_A man. But my mommy can be saved," she said._

"_Can you tell me where she is? Maybe I can help her," Olivia tried again._

"_My mommy has to listen to the angel. If she does what the angel says, she'll live, but if she ignores it, the man will kill her," the girl said._

"_Come with me, sweetheart, let's see if we can find her," Olivia said._

"_I already found her," the girl answered. "Now I just have to wait."_

"_Olivia!" the voice called again. Olivia picked up the girl and carried her as she sought out the voice once again. Another corridor opened for her to go down. She followed the twists and turns into another clearing, holding tight to the tiny child in her arms. She saw a figure, draped in a white robe with a white light surrounding her. Huge majestic wings graced her back, and her posture was erect and graceful. Her head turned slightly, as if she had been alerted to Olivia's presence. Her wings lifted slightly, and Olivia found herself at a loss for words._

"_Look, an angel," the child whispered and pointed at the figure. She buried her head in Olivia's neck. "Listen," she whispered._

"_Olivia," the angel spoke. "whatever you do, do not blame the child for the sins of the father." Angela's voice. It was Angela's voice, clear as day._

"_Angela?" Olivia asked. The angel seemed to ignore her. Instead, she looked up, always keeping her back to Olivia._

"_It's time," the angel whispered, reaching her arms towards the sky._

"…it's time to wake up." Alex said, shaking Olivia slightly. "Come on, sleepyhead, wake up." Olivia rolled over, shaking the dream from her conscious mind. Fragments of it continued to haunt her. The little girl, the angel, the maze. What had the angel been saying? It had seemed so important at the time.

"Mmm…what time is it?" Olivia asked.

"Almost noon. Go on, hop in the shower. I'll go make us something to eat," Alex replied. "Elliot will be here soon." Olivia obediently rose, rubbed her eyes and headed for the bathroom as Alex headed for the kitchen. Just another normal day, and yet, everything felt off.

_**Well, that was one hell of a dream. Stay tuned to find out what it all meant. I hope you are all still enjoying the journey, but sadly, the end is near. Shoutout to saavik55 for her wonderful assistance with the dream.**_


	46. Chapter 46

**Chapter 46**

"Just a minute!" Olivia yelled as the doorbell rang. She and Alex had lingered over lunch longer than they had planned to, and now, she was running late. She jogged down the hall and pulled open the front door.

"Hi," she said slightly breathless. Elliot was standing on her doorstep and exactly 1:30, just as he promised.

"You ready?" he asked.

"Almost," she answered. "Make yourself comfortable," she added as she sprinted back upstairs. Elliot strolled into the living room where he found Alex curled up in a chair with her nose in a book.

"Hey, Alex," he greeted her.

"Hi," she replied with a smile. "Have a seat," she added, gesturing towards the sofa. Elliot sat down and placed his elbows on his knees.

"Are you sure you don't want to come with us?" he asked.

"You want me to come with you while you talk shop with a bunch of cops? Thanks, but no thanks," she replied. "I'm looking forward to spending the afternoon when a pot of tea and a good book."

Olivia had applied her favorite lip gloss, retrieved her brown leather jacket from the closet, and checked her purse for the essentials before dashing back downstairs. As an afterthought, she had clipped her gold detective's badge to her hip, choosing to leave her gun in the safe. Technically, she wasn't on duty, so she shouldn't be carrying it, but she wanted to badge to identify herself as a fellow officer and not just an ordinary citizen.

"…she actually read this?" Olivia heard Elliot say as she came down the stairs.

"Mhm. We had a long talk about it, too. She's opening up about it," Alex answered. Olivia rounded the corner and saw Elliot holding the Bible in his hands.

"Hey, Liv," Elliot said, returning the book to the table. _Please__don__'__t__say__anything__about__that,_ Olivia thought. She was fine with discussing this with Alex, but she wasn't sure she was ready to go head to head with Elliot about religion just yet. "Ready to go?" was all he said. The two headed out the front door and drove away. Alex returned her attention to her book. It wasn't often that she indulged in pure fiction, but it was still her favorite genre. Too often, she was required to spend her hours pouring over case law and legal briefs. Today, she was going to enjoy a sultry romance novel. She had just reached the point where the hero and heroine admitted that they were in love with each other when she heard a knock on the front door.

"Olivia, did you forget your key again?" she yelled as she made her way down the hall. "I swear, I'm going to tie that thing to your…oh," she stopped as she opened the door. It wasn't Olivia at all. "Dad?" she asked.

"Hello, Alexandra," he said. "I hope this isn't a bad time. Can we talk?" Alex was stunned. She hadn't seen her father in almost twenty years, and yet here he was on the front stoop. She gaped at him for a moment. "Look, if this is a bad time, I can come back later," he said, breaking the trance she was in.

"No, no…it's fine. Come in," Alex said, stepping back. She felt self-conscious about inviting her father into his own house. Although, the Cabot family rule was that whoever was there at the time was treated as the owner. So, when Alex was there, it was her house. When any of her relatives were there, it was theirs. 

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"It's late October," he mused. Alex wasn't sure what to think. Did her father come for an argument, or was he really just 'dropping in'?

"Yeah…" Alex answered, following him as he walked through the house and stepped out onto the porch.

"Your mother passed away in October," he mused. Of course. Alex didn't want to remember the details of that night. She had been in her house in Wisconsin under Federal Witness Protection. The message had come through the U.S. Marshalls by way of Olivia. She had seen the obituary in the paper and insisted that Alex be told, wherever she was. "I come up here every year on the anniversary, just to be close to her again."

"I know. I wish I could have made it to the funeral, but…" she trailed off.

"Your safety was more important, Alexandra," he answered. "I understand completely." He continued to gaze out over the ocean. "She loved it up here so much. That's why I scattered her ashes along the beach." Alex followed his gaze to the very shoreline she had just been running along hours ago. It was the perfect resting place for her mother, who spent her mornings here running the exact same path.

"Sometimes I wonder what Angela was doing out on the road so late. If she hadn't been such an airhead, Mom would still be here," Alex mused, breaking the silence. Her father swallowed the lump in his throat.

"Have you still not forgiven her after all these years?" he asked. Alex whirled to face him.

"How can I, Dad? She killed my _mom_," Alex spat.

"You two were so close when you were teenagers. I always thought that friendships like that couldn't be broken. Then again, I also thought that you and I would always remain close," he said.

"I tried writing to you, calling, but you wouldn't see me," Alex reminded him. "So eventually I just gave up."

"I was wrong, Alexandra. I've been wrong about so many things. I shouldn't have turned away from you," he said.

"Where do we go from here?" Alex asked.

"I need your forgiveness," he said, finally turning to look at her. Alex embraced her father for the first time in years.

"I could never hate you, Daddy," she said.

"Oh, Alexandra, there's one more thing I have to confess to you, that I need your forgiveness for. It's probably better that you not know, but I can't carry the guilt around any longer," he said.

"What is it?" Alex asked in a small voice.

"Angela wasn't responsible for your mother's death. I was. I was too tired to be behind the wheel that night, and I must have fallen asleep behind the wheel. The next thing I knew, I was in the wrong lane, and then the crash…" he trailed off, his voice choking. Alex stepped back, dumbfounded.

"But all of the reports…Angela said…" she stuttered.

"She lied," her father said simply.

"But…why?" Alex asked.

"In her mind, it was better for you to hate her and blame her than for you to hate me. But since you hate me now anyway, it doesn't seem like there was much of a point to that. You needed to know the truth," he confessed. "You deserved to know the truth." Alex felt the tears prick at her eyes, but the man standing in front of her had taught her from an early age that Cabots don't cry. She ducked inside in order to hide the drops of moisture from her father's watchful eye.

"Alexandra, wait!" her father called after her, following her inside. She stopped inside the living room. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't hold the tears back. They fell from her eyes, betraying her façade of elegance and composure.

"All these years! All these years I spent hating her, and she was never the one to blame!" Alex cried, spinning to face him.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly. "I should have told you a long time ago." Alex wanted to say more to him, but she heard the engine of Elliot's car as it pulled into the driveway.

"You should go," she said. "Olivia's back."

"Olivia?" he asked questioningly.

"She's…my finacee," Alex explained. Her father seemed surprised.

"Oh," he answered. "I'd like to meet her."

_**I know, it's short, but you all should be putting the pieces together by now. Stay tuned; I'm on a roll today!**_


	47. Chapter 47

**Chapter 47**

Elliot and Olivia came through the door nearly doubling over in laughter. They were going on about some inside joke involving the game of golf, which Alex couldn't understand. Then again, those two had more inside jokes than any pair should.

"Hey, Alex! Elliot and I were going to grab a pizza, and we were wondering if…" Olivia stopped suddenly at the entrance to the living room. The blood drained from her face leaving her deathly pale. She recognized the man standing in the living room, and it was a face she never wanted to see again as long as she lived. With lightning speed, she yanked the gun from the holster at Elliot's waist and pointed it at him.

"Don't move," she said in her best cop voice.

"Liv, what the hell?" Alex asked, stunned.

"Hello, Olivia," he said.

"Liv? Put the gun down," Elliot said calmly.

"Why don't you tell them who you are?" Olivia asked.

"He's my father, Liv," Alex answered first. Olivia hid the shock her brain was processing.

"Who do you think he is, Liv?" Elliot asked.

"Come on, Elliot, you should recognize him too. You were there," Olivia said, never once taking her eyes off the man she had her gun trained on. Elliot studied the face closely. No, it couldn't be…

"Isaiah?" he asked.

"I've been known by that name, yes," he answered.

"What the hell is he doing here, Alex?" Olivia spat, anger creeping into her voice.

"I don't know, he just showed up. He said he wanted to visit the spot where mom's ashes were scattered and…no, he can't be Isaiah," Alex answered.

"Nice story," Olivia said to Isaiah. "But it ends with me putting a bullet in you."

"Liv, no!" Alex cried.

"Really, Alex? After everything he's put us through? Tell me why I shouldn't kill him where he stands right now while I have the chance," Olivia replied. And then it happened. Again. It was so quick, Olivia didn't have a chance to fire a shot before she realized what was going on. Isaiah pulled a small blade from his belt, grabbed Alex by the arm and held it to her throat.

"What are you going to do now, Olivia?" he asked. "Remember how you were in the hospital? You would have done anything to protect her, except it was never really her. We just happened to find someone who looked like her, but you still bought it. Every word of it. Put the gun down, Olivia, and I promise I won't kill her," he said.

"You would kill your own daughter?" Olivia asked, stunned and appalled.

"Well, honestly, I hadn't planned on it, but if it becomes necessary, yes, I will," he answered non-chalantly. "I had hoped that she could be saved, but she explained to me that the two of you were engaged. I'm wondering if there's enough of her soul that hasn't been corrupted by Satan to save."

"Daddy, stop!" Alex cried.

"Come on, Olivia, you would still lay down your life for her, wouldn't you? Or will she just become another soul on your conscience, like all of the others," he taunted.

"Let her go," Olivia said coldly. Alex's head was reeling. There was no way Olivia was going to be able to save her a second time, and there was no way both of them were going to live through this. She needed to save herself this time.

"You're right, Dad," Alex said. "My soul has been seized by the devil, but I can learn. I swear I can." Isaiah paused to look at his daughter without giving an inch on the grip he had on her. She closed her eyes and hoped that Olivia would understand when this was all over.

"No one's been possessed by anyone," Elliot said, finally recovering from his own shock enough to do something.

"Nice try, Alexandra," Isaiah replied, tightening his grip even farther. It was a weak attempt at saving her life, and everyone in the room knew it, but it was the one that resulted in Alex's best chance for survival. The gun was trembling in Olivia's hands. She was terrified, but she was doing everything possible to keep it suppressed. There was no way she was going to let either of them be injured a second time.

"Liv, give me the gun," Elliot tried again. Still, she made no move to comply with his request.

"Not on your life, Elliot," Olivia replied, finally acknowledging his presence. Alex took a deep breath. She was going to have to act, or else she was going to be dead, because there was no way Olivia was going to let go of that gun. She held her right hand over her father's wrist and lifted her left hand in a surrendering pose. Olivia narrowed her eyes. She recognized the movement, but she wasn't sure if Alex knew how to execute it or not. Isaiah's head was next to Alex's. Alex counted to three silently, reached up with her left hand and jammed two fingers into each of his eyes. Well, that was the intention anyway. Her middle finger connecting with an eye while her pointer finger connected with the bridge of his nose. Isaiah winced at the sudden pain, and Alex seized the opportunity to rotate the hand holding the knife upward. The blade skidded across her chin, but the wound was shallow. Elliot lunged forward, jerked Isaiah's arm behind him, and forced him to the ground.

"It's over, Liv, put the gun down," he said again.

"No," she whispered. "I can't." Her finger was resting on the trigger, begging to be squeezed.

"Liv, stop," Alex said, whipping her head from Isaiah to Olivia. "Do you hate him more than you love me?" The words hit Olivia like truck. No matter what had happened, this man was still Alex's father. Elliot snapped his cuffs on Isaiah. The immediate threat was over. Legally, she had no grounds to shoot him, and Elliot, Olivia, and Alex were all keenly aware of this fact. No, Olivia didn't hate him more than she loved Alex. She couldn't. Her attention drifted to the mirror above the fireplace for a split second, and she could have sworn she saw…no, it couldn't be.

_Do__not__repay__evil__with__evil__or__insult__with__insult__…_ Then again, maybe it was. She could have sworn she saw Angela's face flash across the glass. Perhaps it was a trick of the lights, but…

_Do__not__repay__evil__with__evil__or__insult__with__insult. _Angela had marked that passage specifically for her. Olivia lowered her weapon, choosing her love for Alex over her hatred for Isaiah.

"Alex, call the Sheriff. Tell him to get over here," Olivia said. Alex heaved a sigh of relief and picked up the phone next to the couch. Elliot opened his mouth to read Isaiah his rights and rethought his next move. Instead, he glanced toward Olivia.

"Your collar, Liv," he said. Yes, her collar. She was still a cop, and damn good one at that.

"Isaiah Cabot, you have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right the presence of an attorney. If you cannot afford one, one will be appointed to you. Do you understand these rights as I've explained them to you?" she said from memory. Isaiah snickered.

"Yeah, good thing my daughter's an ace lawyer," he answered.

"Don't even think of asking me to defend you," Alex snapped as she replaced the phone in its cradle. Within minutes, they heard the sirens approaching the house and soon the living room was once again filled with cops.

"You didn't kill him," Alex said softly to Olivia as Isaiah was being escorted out of the house.

"No," Olivia answered.

"Why not?" Alex asked.

"Because, if I surrender to hatred over love, then I'm no better than he is," Olivia answered.

"Happy Halloween," Elliot said glumly, as he joined the two women on the front steps. "You did good in there, Liv," he said. She nodded in acknowledgement.

"So…what now?" Alex asked.

"Now, we go home," Liv answered.

_**The End! Stick around folks, there's still an epilogue to follow. I don't want to leave you all hanging!**_


	48. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

**Five years later…**

"Angela Elliot Cabson, I baptize you in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit," Rev. MacMillan said, punctuated each name with a splash of water on the tiny infant's head. "Members of the Westside Presbyterian Church, I now present our newest addition." He took the baby and paraded her around the sanctuary before handing her back to her mother.

Olivia gazed at the tiny infant in her arms. She was perfect, right down to the last strand of dark curly hair on her head. She turned back towards her wife and smiled. After they had returned to New York, Alex had followed through on her promise of bringing Olivia to church with her. Every Sunday, it had been the same. Olivia wasn't sure if she wanted to go back or not, but for that Sunday she would go. Alex had been offered the opportunity to serve as an Elder, which she had gladly accepted with Olivia's full support. The congregation had welcomed the two women with open arms. While the overall denomination didn't openly embrace homosexual couples, Westside Presbyterian was working diligently to change that, and Alex wanted to be at the forefront of that fight.

Even still, the congregation had pitched in for the wedding, offering up whatever services they could provide. Olivia had never felt so welcomed or loved in all her life, except perhaps by Alex. Her eyes drifted farther to Elliot, who was standing next to Alex at the baptismal font. The two had decided immediately that he should be the sponsor, or godparent, of their new daughter. After all, he had been the reason she was here at all.

Olivia had taken time off for her honeymoon with Alex, when a victim wandered into the precinct. She had been abducted and raped, and by the time she got to a hospital, it was too late for the morning after pill to have any effect. She couldn't find it in her heart to abort, but she didn't want to keep the child either. Alex had pulled some strings with one of her many lawyer friends, and they had adopted the baby quietly.

Olivia's eyes continued their sweep of the church. In the front pew sat Cragen, Fin, and Munch, ever present for the important days in Alex and Olivia's lives. Angela started to fuss in Olivia's arms, but a whisper of soothing words calmed her instantly. They took their seats as the service continued. Olivia was amazed at how easily she had meshed with the congregation here. The fact that she had found a spiritual home was proof that miracles happened. The service came to an end and the family proceeded to the gathering room in the church that normally hosted a coffee and social hour, but today, they were sponsoring a reception for Angela's baptism.

"So, Olivia, I suppose we'll be baptizing you next, huh?" Rev. MacMillan commented after the service. Olivia blushed slightly. Alex laughed.

"I highly doubt that one's going to happen," Alex answered.

"Actually," Olivia began, "Rev. MacMillan and I had a meeting earlier this week. I've asked to be baptized." Now it was Alex's turn to be surprised.

"Liv…I…I don't know what to say," Alex replied.

"I want to be baptized here. You were right, Alex, years ago. These people _do_ live the message of Christ, and I would be honored to join the family," Olivia answered. "But do me a favor, don't say anything to the guys just yet. I'll let them know once we set a firm date. I still have to meet with the Elders first," Olivia added.

"Of course, Liv. You know I'll let you go at your own pace. But Liv, I'm so happy for you," Alex said, hugging her wife fiercely.

"Are you sure you're ok with me bailing on the reception? I know how much you wanted us to do this as a family," Alex asked.

"It's fine. Go do what you need to do," Olivia answered as she headed towards the reception with her child.

XxXxX

Alex signed the registry book and submitted to the required search at her destination. She hated coming here, and in fact, she had avoided it for as long as she could. Now it was time to put the past to rest once and for all. She followed as the guard led her through series after series of sturdy iron doors, deep into the heart of the prison. The man she sought was already seated behind a bulletproof sheet of plexiglass as she took a seat in front of it. She lifted the receiver and spoke into it.

"I got your request," Alex said.

"I'm glad the District Attorney was able to convince you to come see me. I've missed you, Alexandra," Isaiah said.

"What do you want?" Alex said, entirely unamused.

"I don't know where we went so wrong," he said.

"You still don't get it, do you? This is who I am and you tried to kill me for it. Every day I pray that someday, you'll understand that hatred is what got you here, and as long as you continue to hold on to that, you will continue to lose everything you hold dear," Alex said.

"I still have hope that you will see that what you're doing is wrong, that you will find a respectable man and have a real marriage," he replied. Alex's eyes narrowed.

"I have a real marriage. Legal and binding. To Olivia. And, no matter what you say or do, you can't change that. Dad, I love you, but I'm not going to live a lie to make you happy. You should be grateful for everything Olivia has done for you, in spite of the many times you've tried to kill her," Alex answered.

"That little witch has stolen you from me and corrupted you," he said.

"She could have killed you the night you showed up at the Cape," Alex replied. "And it was her victim statement at her trial that persuaded the judge to give you life instead of the needle, which he had every right to do. And yet, Olivia has chosen not to repay evil with evil. God only knows where she gets the strength do that because I'm not sure I ever could," Alex spat back. "Now look, I came to say good-bye. Don't ever contact me or my family again. If you do, I'll see to it that the few privileges you have are revoked." With that, Alex slammed the receiver down and marched towards the exit.

"The Prophets of Leviticus are still out there! You can't hide forever! One day, they'll find you, and I won't be there to protect you!" Isaiah yelled as the guards dragged him back to his cell. Alex continued her march out of the prison and drove home quickly without a look back.

XxXxX

"How's you father?" Olivia asked as Alex returned to their home where the baptism celebration was still in full swing.

"Oh, he's still crazy," Alex said. "But, I told him to stop bothering us, and I let the prison administration know that. I don't think we'll be hearing from him again."

"Good," Olivia said, smiling.

"Where's my daughter? I still haven't had a chance to hold her, and right now, that's all I want to do," Alex asked.

"Oh, she's with Elliot. You know he can't keep his hands off of her," Olivia said, pointing them out.

"Of course not. He's been like that ever since you told him you named her after him," Alex quipped before rushing over to embrace the child.

"Hey, Liv," Cragen's voice said from behind her. Olivia turned to face him.

"What is it, Captain?" she asked.

"Listen, I know this is a special day for you, and I hate to do this, but there's a victim down at Mercy. One of the nurses called and specifically requested you. If you don't want to go, I can always send another detective," he said.

"It's fine, Captain. I'll go. Just let me tell Alex first," she said.

XxXxX

Olivia easily found the room the nurse's had indicated to her when she entered the hospital. She expected to see a lonely, frightened woman, which was so often the case in these situations. She found her victim, but the young woman wasn't alone. Sitting by her bed was a petite woman with short black hair and a face Olivia immediately recognized.

"Angela?" she asked. The woman smiled.

"I think you have me mistaken for someone else. I'm Sister Mary Michael, one of the chaplains here. I was called in by request," she answered, but the smile was still the same. "Rachel, I'm going to be out in the waiting room. I'll be back in after you speak with the detective."

"Hi Rachel, I'm Detective Olivia Cabson. Can you tell me what happened?" Olivia asked. She sat through the entire story. A nurse came in and completed the rape kit as the young girl continued with her tale. It was a typical campus assault, one that would easily be solved since she could identify her attacker.

"I don't understand," Rachel said, as she finally began to cry. "How could God allow something like this to happen?"

"I don't think He did, Rachel, but I'm not exactly an expert on God. Sometimes, these things just happen. Sister Mary Michael might be able to help you wrestle with that question," Olivia replied.

"Detective," Rachel asked as Olivia was getting ready to leave.

"Yes?" Olivia replied.

"Does this ever get easier?" she asked. Olivia sighed.

"In time and with the proper help, yes it does. I'll do everything I can to help you, and it sounds like you have support from other sources as well." It was then that Olivia noticed the simple gold cross hanging on a delicate chain around Rachel's neck.

_If you find it offensive in any way, I simply ask that you pass it on to someone who might find it useful._

"Rachel, I don't normally do this, but right now, I think you could use this more than I can," Olivia said, reaching into her purse. She extracted the battered Bible Angela had given her, the very one that she had found so much solace in over the years. She had carried it in her purse for years, searching for the right person to pass it to.

"Are you sure?" Rachel asked, taking the book from Olivia.

"Yes. It was a gift to me when I needed it most, and at this particular point in time, I think it would serve you well. All I ask is that when you're through with it, pass it on to someone else who could use it," Olivia said.

"Where did you get it?" Rachel asked.

"It was given to me by…an angel," Olivia answered. Olivia gathered the evidence to take to the crime lab as she left the halls of Mercy Hospital. There would always be victims and perps, but deep down, Olivia knew, without a doubt, that there was a God, and that she was loved.

_**Ok, it's really over now. Thanks to all of you who have read and reviewed. This has been a fantastic ride, and I'm glad I got to share it with all of you. I hope that you have learned something, too, and I pray that you all find your own Angelas because yes, angels really do walk among us.**_


End file.
